


i don't care what's written in your history, as long as you're here with me

by chxrylblossom



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: F/F, but child abuse warning, but i like to torture myself and my readers with slow burns, cheryl blossom really needs a hug, cheryl is the gayest gay, choni, clifford and penelope are horrible parents as per usual, eventual romance and relationship, i am terrible at tags and summaries, mostly out of character, slow burn toni and cheryl, so you should probably just read it ;), soft cheryl and toni for the most part, toni is bi but she's more into girls anyway, toni topaz deserves the world, trigger warnings will be included
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2019-11-18 02:24:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 45,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18111338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chxrylblossom/pseuds/chxrylblossom
Summary: toni is supposed to hate cheryl. all her friends do, that's for sure. she's supposed to hate the weird daughter of the man who is slowly but surely destroying her life. and yet, toni can't find it in herself to look at this girl with anything akin to hatred.orthe one where cheryl is shy and a little reclusive, and toni is her saving grace... plus some drama.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so... a new fic! 
> 
> it's mostly au, so unless mentioned (aside from the obvious) don't take anything that happens in the show as a given. 
> 
> i'm quite excited for this one, i have a few solid ideas - and a bunch of pre written chapters - so i hope you guys like it, let me know what you think in the comments n stuff! 
> 
> (also if you read my other fic i apologise for the inconsistency/lack of updates. hoping to get to that soon!)

 

Toni growls in frustration, biting down on her lip almost hard enough to draw blood as she leans back against her bike, double-checking the kickstand with a quick tap of her foot. “This is bullshit,” she mutters, and at times like this she’s glad for the packet of cigarettes in her jacket pocket, because she pulls one out and lights it without a second thought.

 

She stares right back at Jughead as he watches her with something comparable to judgement.

 

He looks away. “Yeah. I agree, but…” With a quiet exhale, he runs a hand through his mess of hair, for once not topped with that god-awful beanie. “We have to keep our wits about us. Not lose our heads.” He looks to Sweet Pea at this, and Toni’s thankful that he’s looking the other way because he was riled up right now and would take a swing at Jughead without question.

 

“They think we’re fucking pushovers, Jones,” Sweet Pea growls, foot scuffing against the ground, unintentionally kicking gravel stones towards Toni’s bike.

 

“Maybe we are,” she mutters, taking a drag of her smoke and disregarding Fangs shooting her an outraged glare. “We can’t just stand by and let them steal our turf. Literally take the ground we’re living on out from beneath us. Money might count for a lot, but this land, this trailer park has been in my family for years. _Generations_ , Jug.”

 

“I know, Toni. Mine too,” Jughead sighs.

 

Toni wants to slap him because, _no_ , not his too. FP wasn’t even a blood Serpent - but her _parents_ had been, and her grandfather too. The founder of the Uktena Tribe. If they lost this, the last thing aside from the Whyte Wyrm that the Serpents have to their name… It would destroy her grandfather. She doesn’t want to see that happen.

 

“Fucking Northsiders. They think they’re so much better than us because, what, they get to live in those fancy mansions, while we’re _‘stuck’_ here?” Sweet Pea hisses, fist slamming against the tree he’s leant against.

 

Swallowing harshly, Fangs looks to Jughead, and Toni can see the fear in his eyes. She immediately feels her anger dissipate, replaced with concern and _heartbreak_ for her best friend. The Southside may be her home, all of theirs, but Fangs doesn’t just have himself to think about - he has his sick mom, and four little siblings. All of whom he’s been responsible for ever since his mom fell ill.

 

Toni drops her cigarette to the dirt, stamping it out and reaching out, gripping his hand in an act that she hopes is comforting. He gives her a soft, yet scared smile.

 

“What does FP say?” He asks gruffly, clearing his throat and squeezing Toni’s hand.

 

Jughead looks uneasy. “I haven’t exactly… Told him yet. But it’s not like I’m obligated to, I mean, I’m the Serpent Ki-” he begins, but he’s cut off by Sweet Pea giving him a hard shove backwards, and he very nearly loses his balance.

 

“Don’t be an idiot, Jones! You’re seventeen, man, we all are! You’re not the Serpent King, you’re a kid playing dress up, and you’re about to cost us all our fucking homes!” Sweet Pea is gripping his shoulder, face inches away from Jughead’s, and he’s clenching his fist in a manner that is threatening to even witness.

 

“Hey, Sweets, calm down!” Toni says, dropping Fangs’ hand, her own curling around Sweet Pea’s bicep, fingers digging in a little as she pulls him back. He hisses at her, but she knows he’d never push her away like he would one of the guys, which is why she doesn’t let go. She’s pissed at Jughead too - she usually is - but getting into fights with each other isn’t going to help them right now.

 

They have to stick together.

 

Toni sighs, stepping back once he’s taken a few steady breaths and given her a nod to get off him. “Look just… Talk to FP, okay, Jug? You may be the big boss now, but your dad’s been doing this for years. Not to mention he went to high school with Lodge and Blossom, right? So if anything he can _testify to their character._ ”

 

Neither Sweet Pea nor Jughead laugh at that, so Toni’s grateful when Fangs gives a small snort of amusement.

 

“Yeah… Okay, guys, I’ll talk to my dad and we’ll call a meeting. But until then please keep it down low. The last thing we need is mass hysteria until we have a plan in mind,” Jughead says, voice steadier than it was before, and Toni’s just glad that he’s talking some sense now.

 

She nods. “I’m telling my grandpa, but other than that you have my word,” she sighs, and Jughead looks like he’s about to argue, but he must catch the look in Toni’s eye that says there’s no leeway on this.

 

Without Thomas Topaz, the Serpents wouldn’t exist. There’d be no such concept in Riverdale, and the Ghoulies would probably rule the Southside. He’s one of the only few more important than the Serpent King himself (which, although her and Fangs would hesitate to admit, they all believe should _not_ be Jughead).

 

“Yeah, okay. Guys?” His gaze is on Fangs and Sweet Pea. He shrinks away a little at the murderous look in Sweet Pea’s eyes - Toni doesn’t blame him.

 

Fangs nods, and with a small nudge in the side on her part, Sweet Pea gives a begrudging nod too.

 

Jughead looks relieved, sucking in a breath of air between his teeth. “Okay. And look, don’t worry. There’s no way we’re losing our homes to the Lodges, or the Blossoms. Over my fucking dead body.”

 

“Mine too,” Fangs echoes, lifting his hand into the signature Serpent symbol of unity.

 

Toni just hopes it doesn’t come to that.

 

*

 

“Is that… Mud?”

 

Penelope Blossom sounds entirely outraged and mortified as she pokes at Cheryl’s shoulder, before pointing to a small smudge of possible dirt on Cheryl’s white tights. Cheryl’s gaze follows her mother’s, and she winces at the sight. She gives a stiff nod.

 

“Yes,” she replies, daring a brief look towards her father, who doesn’t spare her a glance as he casually turns the page of his newspaper. He’s used to Penelope’s dramatics, and probably just grateful that she prefers to take it out on Cheryl rather than him.

 

Penelope sighs, fingers digging into Cheryl’s shoulder as she pushes her away. Cheryl staggers slightly and looks at her mother in confusion.

 

“Go! Go and change right now,” Penelope says firmly, looking Cheryl up and down again, lips curling upwards into a sneer-like expression and brow furrowing in perhaps, disgust?

 

Cheryl’s stomach sinks, but she gives an obedient nod all the same. It’s taken her years to learn that talking back to Penelope gets her no more than a slap around the face, and she’ll do better to just listen and obey.

 

“Leave the child alone, Penelope,” her father sighs, but Penelope sends him a glare, and he’s back to being silent. He doesn’t really care, he’d just rather read the gossip of _The Riverdale Register_ in silence.

 

Cheryl is quick to scramble up the stairs, tugging off her tights with little difficulty and finding a new pair without any dirt smudges, holes, or loose threads. All of which she’s certain Penelope would label as unacceptable and slobbish. She’s six minutes behind schedule by the time that she’s finally downstairs, and she heard Veronica’s car horn sound from outside as her foot touches the bottom step.

 

Her mother gives her an unimpressed look from the dining room table.

 

Cheryl tries to avoid her gaze, slipping on her shoes at the bottom of the stairs. There’s a mark of dried mud at the heel, but Penelope’s not looking. She’s watching Cheryl carefully, though, and as she starts to walk towards the front door, Penelope stands up, and moves to intercept her pathway.

 

“You’ll be home at three forty-five, yes?” Penelope says, hand extending to brush a non-existent crease out of Cheryl’s blouse. Upon instinct, Cheryl flinches and it simply earns her an eye roll and a quiet huff of irritation from her mother.

 

“Yes,” Cheryl replies simply, pursing her lips as she feels a vibration from her phone, and Veronica sounds her car horn again.

 

Penelope nods firmly, glancing out the window. Cheryl knows if it were anyone else, Penelope would have a sharp remark to make, but it’s Veronica, Hiram’s _daughter_ , and Penelope wouldn’t admit it but Cheryl suspects she’s a little afraid of Clifford’s business partner.

 

And for Penelope Blossom, with fear comes respect. Cheryl half believes that’s why she insists on being so _cruel_ to her. The other half of her just believes in the evil that exists within her parents.

 

“Bye Mommy. Bye Daddy,” Cheryl speaks her usual greetings, voice quiet as she does. And, also as usual, she gives her parents each a hopeful glance - because maybe one of these days, maybe if she wishes for it hard enough, a reply like ‘ _have a nice day, darling_ ’ or ‘ _goodbye, dear_ ’ would leave their lips.

 

She has no such luck today, though. She’s met with silence, and a sigh of exhaustion from Penelope. Cheryl rushes to leave the house before she can let the tears build up in her eyes. Veronica’s waiting, anyway.

 

“We’re _ten_ minutes late, Cheryl. Ten _._ That’s ten minutes off my _talking-to-Archie-Andrews_ time, and ten minutes off of your _staring-at-Toni-Topaz-from-a-distance_ time,” Veronica’s talking as soon as Cheryl’s in the car, and the red-haired girl isn’t surprised - her best friend always likes to fill in the gaps of conversation that she often fails to fill herself. It doesn’t seem to phase Veronica, though, she’s a skilled soliloquist.

 

“Hi. Sorry,” Cheryl sets her bag down at her feet, folding her hands in her lap with a heavy sigh. Lana Del Rey is playing softly from the radio, and Cheryl relaxes slightly against the comfortable leather of Veronica’s car seats. Her iced tea from Pop’s is sat in the cup holder as usual, beside Veronica’s empty cappuccino cup, but the ice looks to have melted, and the plastic has steamed up so the car heater has probably warmed it to undrinkable.

 

Cheryl doesn’t much fancy it anyway, her stomach feels a little unsettled. It usually does when she’s anxious - which she is, because she _always_ is, especially after such a tense encounter with Penelope that left her overly conscious of her outfit choice and terrified to dirty her clothes.

 

“Cheryl? Earth to Blossom?” Veronica speaks, drawing Cheryl’s attention away from the loose thread at the hem of her skirt. She’ll fix that later, she’ll add it to her mental to-do list. When Cheryl looks to her, indicating she has her attention, Veronica continues. “Are you okay? I was only kidding, I don’t mind that we’re late-”

 

“I’m okay, Ronnie. Drive please,” Cheryl offers a small smile, but glances nervously at the clock. She’s had a late already, this semester, and an absence. They’re flaws on her record, and Cheryl doesn’t like flaws. She’s a perfectionist - whether by nature or influence she’s not quite sure.

 

Veronica looks doubtful, but getting words out of Cheryl are hard enough, let alone when she’s not in the mood to talk. She starts the engine, launching into a story that Cheryl is half listening to and pulling out of Thornhill in a messy U-turn that makes Cheryl smile slightly. Having Veronica drive her to school now is unusual, but at the same time familiar, because she’s just as bad of a driver as Ja-

 

No. Turns out it’s too soon to think about him and smile. She feels a pain in her chest and has to remind herself to breathe for a few seconds, because the air suddenly feels thick and heavy like tar in her lungs. She tries to focus on the sound of Veronica’s voice instead of the loud pounding of her pulse in her ears.

 

“-turns out she told him I was interested. I mean, it’s obvious I’m not, isn’t it? I know I don’t exactly make _heart eyes_ at Archie, but he’s sort of like my boyfriend anyway and I thought people knew that? Obviously not, but I’m thinking I should talk to him and get his take on… On it… Cheryl?” Veronica’s turning to look at her, frowning softly, seeming to forget she’s actually driving on a road, because her gaze is on her best friend.

 

Cheryl practically squeaks, gesturing in front of her with wide eyes. “Watch the _road_ ,” she says, staring at Veronica in disbelief when the girl’s attention snaps back straight ahead.

 

“Oops!” She slows in time to reach the intersection, and Cheryl exhales a shaky breath as she rolls her eyes - Veronica is a _dangerous_ driver. “I was paying attention, Cher, I promise. In my peripheral vision.”

 

They pull up at school with nine minutes to spare until the first bell, and Cheryl’s quick to double check her makeup in the mirror, grimacing at the small smudge of lipstick off her lip that she wipes off with a quick swipe of her thumb, and a mildly satisfied hum. She’s surprised that her mother didn’t pick up on that. With Penelope, it’s everything neat, tidy and in place; or not at all.

 

Veronica links her arm with Cheryl’s as they get out of the car, Cheryl’s face beginning to burn as they walk through the crowd and up towards the school entrance. Veronica’s presence always attracts attention, and today’s no different, heads turning their way. That’s one of the downfalls of travelling to school with Veronica, Cheryl decides, because with Jason it had been easy enough to slip under the radar. He was popular, well-liked, but not quite the showstopper that Veronica is and _has_ been since they were five years old. Cheryl knows it’s partially her drawing the attention too, though, because ever since Jason… _died_ , people have looked at her - actually noticed her - and she hates it. She’s been a wallflower her whole life, she was hoping to make it through high school keeping it that way.

 

But she was also hoping to make it through high school with her brother… So not everything happens as planned.

 

“I have to go to my locker, and I don’t want to be late to first. So I’ll see you later, Ronnie,” Cheryl says softly, squeezing Veronica’s arm before allowing her own to fall to her side. As per usual, she knows Veronica would be making her way to the student lounge to find her other friends, before they made their way to classes together, and although Cheryl finds them to be perfectly tolerable people; she likes to avoid being forced into situations of a social nature as much as possible.

 

Veronica seems to be mostly focused on her phone now, because she gives Cheryl a nod, but doesn’t lift her gaze from her phone. “Bye, Cherry,” she smiles softly, and Cheryl knows for sure that she’s not paying attention, because no one since _Jason_ has called her that, and… She reminds herself to take a few deep breaths, fingers curling into the straps of her backpack, pushing away all thoughts of her dead brother, because the middle of the school corridor is not the place to have a panic attack.

 

She doesn’t say anything else, simply begins to weave her way through the crowds of students clogging up the hall, towards her locker. It was weird starting senior year without Jason by her side, and although they’re five weeks into semester, it’s still strange. They always had the same classes - whether it was intentional or coincidence, it didn’t matter, Cheryl had adapted to getting through high school with her fiercest protector beside her all the time.

 

With time to spare after gathering her books from her locker, Cheryl finds herself in her English class a few minutes before the bell, and she makes her way to her usual seat at the back of the class. She doesn’t usually get called on if she’s quiet, and keeps her head down. Especially since Jason died, she’s able to fly under the radar in class more than ever.

 

And it’s the same with everyone, not just the teachers - because aside from Veronica and her friends, everyone else seems to stick to quizzical gazes in her direction every now and then, that serve to do nothing more than make Cheryl feel scrutinised and more awkward than usual. She’s not sure whether they’re afraid that she’ll crack at the slightest nudge, or whether they just don’t know how to speak to a girl who’s twin brother died two and a half months ago.

 

Either way, she doesn’t mind too much. Jason excluded - she’s always preferred her own company to other people’s.

 

The door to the classroom opens as she’s unpacking her things onto her desk, and Cheryl doesn’t bother to look up because it’s possible that whoever it is hasn’t even noticed her presence. It’s not until a screwed up sheet of paper lands in the middle of her desk, that she lifts her head. She stills for a moment, feeling slightly nauseous, because there are two big guys wearing Serpent jackets stood a couple of rows away from her, arms folded across their chests, everything about the way they hold themselves inspiring intimidation and fear. She recognises them, they’re in this class too and a few of her others, and… They’re _Toni’s_ friends.

 

“And what do we have here?” The taller of the two speaks, his voice a chilling sneer, lips curled into a snarl.

 

Cheryl swallows harshly, gaze flickering back down to her desk as she continues to unpack her bag. Maybe if she ignores them they’ll go away - people don’t usually try to talk to her. Although she has a feeling that they’re not looking for friendly conversation.

 

“Are you deaf, Blossom? We’re talking to you,” the other one says, taking a step forwards, foot kicking the leg of her desk.

 

Cheryl flinches in surprise, and they both laugh loudly. She’s not sure what about that was funny enough to prompt such an outburst, but she simply keeps her head bowed, eyes fixed on a small crevice in the wooden desk.

 

Back in elementary school, she used to get bullied a lot. They’d make fun of her red hair, her braces, her outfit… They’d always find something. She was never sure why they didn’t tease Jason too; his hair was just as red as hers, his teeth just as crooked… Maybe it was because he was popular, because he talked to the other kids, told funny jokes. She wasn’t sure, but she never wanted to give them a reason to start picking on him too, so she didn’t tell him about any of it. He finally found out, though, and when he did, he lost it and punched all the kids that had been tormenting her, right in the face. He got suspended for a week, and Cheryl had burst into tears of guilt, but he’d simply given her a crooked grin and a reassuring pat on the shoulder and told her he would do it again in a heartbeat. She learned how to ignore the bullies after that, out of necessity. She didn’t want to be responsible for her brother’s second suspension, not after the severe telling off he’d received from Penelope and Clifford for it. No. So she taught herself that you don’t react - don’t show that you’re scared, or upset, and they get bored and move on. It works the same with her parents in a way, except Penelope Blossom doesn’t relent until fear is shown.

 

She just hopes it worked now, because this time, she doesn’t have her brother to show up and deck the guys for her.

 

“He _said_ , are you deaf, Blossom,” the taller boy spits, and the other one kicks her desk again, the impact on the table sending her binder falling to the floor. “Answer me!”

 

“No,” she replies, her voice barely audible, but they hear it all the same because they snort and nudge each other in amusement. She bites back a wince, leaning down to grab her folder, only to have it kicked out of her reach. They laugh again, and she can feel tears stinging at her eyes. But she wills them away, reminding herself not to show weakness.

 

“She’s too _fancy_ to talk to us, Fogarty. Little Princess living the life of luxury up in her castle on the hill… while _mommy and daddy_ take away everything we have,” the tall boy sneers, his squinted eyes fixed on Cheryl.

 

Cheryl doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but she should have known this was something to do with Clifford and Penelope. The town has never liked the Blossoms, not since decades ago when their ancestor, General Pickens, slaughtered half of Riverdale’s population in exchange for maple trees. They’ve earned a certain level of respect over the years, but if her parents have taught her anything it’s that respectability doesn’t equal likability. For a short period of time after Jason’s death, there was an unspoken, widespread _kindness_ that they were shown by the rest of the town, but Penelope and Clifford were quickly back to their usual ways, and all of that fell away as quickly as it had come.

 

“Answer us, damn it-” the one who was just referred to as ‘Fogarty’, begins, when the door flies open for a second time, and Cheryl looks up in time to see a girl bursting through the door, bag slung over her shoulder, pink hair flying out behind her; _Toni Topaz_.

 

She has her hands on her hips as she comes to a stop, eyes squinted, lips pursed as she scans the room, gaze lingering on Cheryl. Cheryl’s heart is already pounding in her chest from fear, but now it’s beating extra fast, because this is the girl she’s had a crush on for the last year and a half, and she’s looking right at her for maybe the first time ever…

 

“What the fuck are you guys doing?” She sounds angry, perhaps even outraged, and Cheryl wonders why exactly she’s so mad. “Jones told us to stay _out_ of it. What bit of that makes no sense to you idiots?”

 

It’s almost a humorous situation - this girl who can’t be taller than five foot two stood there reprimanding two boys largely taller than her, who are now both almost hanging their heads in something akin to shame. If she wasn’t on the verge of tears and terrified to embarrass herself in front of Toni Topaz, Cheryl would perhaps laugh.

 

“Come on, Tiny-” the taller boy begins.

 

“Save it, Sweet Pea,” Toni simply growls, taking a few steps forward and leaning down to pick up Cheryl’s pink English binder, much to her surprise. “Is this yours?” She asks, holding it up with an arched eyebrow.

 

Cheryl stares at her for a second, throat suddenly dry, as all of the knowledge that she has of how to communicate with other humans leaves her brain. She’s pretty sure her face is burning, but she splutters out a quiet agreement and gives a nod. Toni’s eyebrow raises further, and Cheryl wants to fucking _disappear_ \- but then the pink-haired Serpent is walking towards her, dropping it down on her desk.

 

“Th-thanks,” Cheryl manages to choke out, swallowing the lump in her throat, cheeks burning as she averts her gaze from Toni, because, her social ineptness is so _embarrassing_.

 

Toni gives a small nod and a shrug. “It’s no big deal,” she says, before turning to the boys again, “Just back off, okay, guys? You might not always agree with Jughead, but he’s the King, not you. So chill out.”

 

There are a few grumbles from the guys, ‘Sweet Pea’ still giving Cheryl a murderous look that she’s trying to avoid. But luckily, a few seconds later, the last bell rings and within a matter of moments more students are flooding into the classroom ready for first period. The small group of Serpents stood before her disband, the two boys going to sit at the front, and Toni… sitting directly to her right.

 

Cheryl feels her stomach flip.

 

She focuses on her binder for a few more minutes, wincing softly at the scuff marks on it and trying to listen to whatever it is that the teacher’s saying, but she can’t help but be painfully aware that Toni is sat just over two feet to the right of her. It makes it hard to concentrate, because Cheryl finds herself wondering why Toni didn’t sit nearer to the front with her scary friends like she usually did. The majority of the lesson’s teachings was usually inaudible over their outrageously boisterous laughs, ‘Sweet Pea’s’ crude remarks, and the teacher shushing them every thirty seconds.

 

Cheryl doesn’t usually mind - she’s normally able to read the text herself, and take down notes from what the teacher is writing up on the board, because she’s not sure she could ever find herself angry at Toni. But today… Today, Toni is sitting right beside her, and she’s (embarrassingly, but truthfully) scared to even breathe in fear of making a fool out of herself again.

 

She manages to catch and note down a few sentences on Shakespeare's presentation of love in _Romeo and Juliet_ , but before long she finds her mind drifting again. Toni had stuck up for her, for some reason, against her own friends. Cheryl had never even thought that Toni knew who she was, and yet she was willing to argue with her friends over her? Yes, maybe it’s a little more complicated than that, but if Cheryl has ever expected anyone to stand up for her if she needed it, a Southside Serpent wouldn’t have been her first guess. Especially not… The Southside Serpent that she’s had a crush on for the last year and a bit.

 

Lifting her head to look up at the board, Cheryl’s shocked to find herself catching Toni’s gaze for a split second. Light brown eyes avert themselves before she has the chance to even process it, but Cheryl’s heart rate picks up once again. Had Toni been watching her? Possibly just glancing her way, but still…

 

She does her best not to stare, but as she goes to drag her eyes away from the Serpent - she catches a tiny smirk playing at Toni’s lips. It makes her stomach flutter.

 

And Cheryl just hopes that maybe, _maybe_ , that smile was for her.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys, i'm back with chapter two! let me know what you all think! comments and kudos are always received with appreciation <3

 

“Twelve minutes late, Cheryl,” her mother’s voice slices through the silence of the house, sending a harsh shiver down Cheryl’s spine, and she has to do her best to bite back a whimper.

 

Penelope Blossom is stood in the doorway of the dining room, hands on hips, peering over the top of her reading glasses. She looks as though she’s been stood there for the last twelve minutes, utterly prepared and waiting for Cheryl to walk through the doors so that she can scold her.

 

“I-I’m sorry. Veronica’s last class ran over,” Cheryl says, tongue darting out to wet her lips as she speaks the lie. Her throat always feels as though it’s closing in when she lies to her parents, because she knows of the consequences, and she knows they’re never good. In honesty, Veronica wouldn’t stop talking to Archie Andrews, despite Cheryl insisting beforehand that she couldn’t be late home as her mother had already been on edge this morning. Veronica had simply dismissed her with a small smile and a squeeze of her shoulder, before launching into a discussion with Archie Andrews about what seemed to be the entirety of his music career, and Cheryl had been too nervous to do anything but stand back and anxiously keep watch of the time.

 

“You could have walked Cheryl,” Penelope says, voice holding nothing but repulsion as her gaze scours over her daughter, and it just causes Cheryl to retreat further into herself with a sullen nod.

 

She doesn’t want to point out that it would’ve taken her thirty five minutes to walk, in comparison to the eight minute drive time. “I will next time. Sorry, Mommy,” she says, voice quiet, and if it weren’t for Penelope’s huff and eye roll, Cheryl. would assume that she hadn’t heard her.

 

“Stop apologising, for God’s sake, child,” she mutters, taking off her glasses to look at Cheryl properly. “Go to your room. I’m sure you have plenty of homework to do.”

 

She doesn’t. Cheryl spends her lunchtimes in the library, or empty classrooms if it’s too busy up there, getting as much of her work done as she can. The canteen is always busy and full of people who like to stare at her - plus, her only option is to sit with Veronica and her friends, which just leads to more staring. She tried it once, and it was the most painful forty minutes of her life… Okay, exaggeration. But it wasn’t fun.

 

Cheryl gives a small nod, fingers curling around the straps of her backpack as she moves to make her way up the stairs, only for Penelope’s harsh grip to clamp around her arm. Cheryl feels her breath catch in her throat, but she doesn’t allow herself to flinch.

 

_Monsters thrive off fear, Cheryl._

 

“If you lie to me again, you won’t see the light of day for a week,” Penelope hisses, sharp nails digging into the soft flesh of Cheryl’s arm, and it’s impossible for the younger Blossom to hold back a wince. That seems enough to satisfy Penelope though, because she’s releasing Cheryl’s arm, jaw clenched in a stony expression that Cheryl barely dares to look at. “Stay in your room until your father gets home. He won’t be pleased to hear about your defiances,” she says, as she walks off towards the kitchen, arms across her chest and face locked into an emotionless glare that should turn everything in her path into ice.

 

Cheryl ignores the stinging of her upper arm, and the burning of impending tears in her eyes. She simply tightens her grip on the straps of her bag and makes her way upstairs, reminding herself to be brave. If there’s anyone that scares her more than Penelope does, then it’s her father. Most of the time he doesn’t acknowledge her existence; Jason was Penelope’s favourite, and Cheryl is certain it was the same for her father.

 

But when he’s angry… Well, Cheryl has never been more terrified in her life than the night of Jason’s death, when her father found out she was the one to row Jason across Sweetwater River _\- the day_ that his lifeless body was found in the middle of the Fox Forest at the bottom of a twenty five foot drop. Her father’s eyes had turned darker than Cheryl had ever seen, his face so red as he puffed his chest in anger that Cheryl thought he might detonate like a bomb. She had been unable to leave the house for two weeks after that night, and even then her mother had insisted on sitting her down in front of the dressing table and applying her makeup to perfection - to conceal the still healing discolouration of her ivory skin.

 

So yes, Penelope scares her, but Clifford _terrifies_ her, and Cheryl makes sure to do everything that she can to avoid crossing them. Especially now that Jason’s gone.

 

Because now he’s gone, she doesn’t have anyone to protect her anymore. And Cheryl’s starting to wonder whether maybe the bullies are both at home and school, because, whatever her parents’ new evil scheme is to avenge their sick vendetta against the town of Riverdale; it’s clearly upset the people of the Southside. And despite her lack of knowledge on the topic (in fact, her lack of knowledge on anything to do with her parents) if her unsavoury encounter this morning was anything to go by, she knows she’s going to be taking the force of it.

 

The thought makes her sigh quietly under her breath. Not for the first time, she wishes that she wasn’t so powerless against her parents. She wishes that she could stand up to them, instead of always submitting to them and their wishes like a _coward_.

 

But that’s not going to happen, and Cheryl knows it. So instead she takes off her shoes, sets down her bag and gets into bed. She’s uncomfortable, but exhausted, and sleeps right through dinner.

 

Neither Penelope nor Clifford bother to wake her.

 

*

 

The yellow envelope sits on the counter, staring Toni in the face as she steps out of her bedroom. She’s instantly gritting her teeth at the sight of it. ‘ **LATE. FINAL WARNING** ’ is stamped on the front, in big red lettering, as if daring a challenge, daring anyone to turn away from the dread it inspires within you.

 

“Uncle Harry?” She says, voice wary, pulling her door shut behind her.

 

She’s never been particularly close with her uncle. He’s the closest thing to a paternal figure that she has in her life, but he’s also the furthest thing from fatherly. He treats Toni more like one of his friends from down at the Wyrm, even allowing her to share his occasional joint. Toni’s father wouldn’t approve, she knows that. He had tried to create a life for her and her mother as far detached and sheltered from the Serpents as he could. But then again, she’s sure they’ve done a lot of things that would disappoint him, if he was still around to feel as such.

 

“In here, kid,” his voice is slow, slurred, and glancing at the digital clock on the cooker, Toni reads that it’s only eight o’clock. She sighs, gathering that means he had found the envelope and realised that there’s not enough money to pay for their rent of the land.

 

“I could pick up a few more shifts at the Wyrm, Hog Eye won’t mind. Or I could talk to FP, he knows you’ve had it rough since you lost your job, he’d give us an extension, maybe a loan-” Toni begins, unintentionally rambling as she makes her way into the living room at a quick walk. She wants to stop her uncle before he gets too drunk, because god knows how long he’s been awake and drinking, and being so out of it at this time of morning can’t be good; unless he’s still drunk from last night.

 

Harry cuts her off with a shout, forming no words in particular. She winces quietly, but comes to a stop, leaning against the back of the tattered couch, where she can just about see him, haphazardly seated in the equally as tattered armchair that faces the other direction.

 

“We don’t accept no charity, Antoinette! I’ve taught you that, no?” he lifts the beer bottle to his lips, missing by a couple of centimetres and ending up with a wet patch down the front of his shirt. Not that it matters, it doesn’t look like he’s going anywhere any time soon.

 

She breathes a sigh, running a hand through her knotted hair. She hasn’t had time to brush it yet, she was planning on taking a quick shower, but she’s not sure if she’ll have time now. “I can pick up a few more shifts then. I’m not scheduled for this weekend, I can drop in before school and put my name down. They’re always looking for extras at the weekends.”

 

There’s a long silence, and then Harry grunts in disapproval. “There’s a reason Byrdie won’t let you in on- on Saturdays, kid. It ain’t a place for you, take my word.”

 

Toni sighs. She’s not sure who he thinks drags him off the floor of the bar at three o’clock on Sunday mornings, when the bar is closing and only the straggling, out-cold drunks are left. She’s seen it all, but she doesn’t want to embarrass him by reminding him of that detail. Nor will she go against him. He has a strong sense of being the ‘ _breadwinner of the house_ ’ despite his status of unemployed for bordering on four months now. The only time that Toni has ever feared Harry could hurt her was when she suggested that it was her that provides for them, her who works almost every day despite having to juggle school work and an actual social life- he had turned so red in the face, his hand slamming against the wall above her head, body trembling with rage. If Sweet Pea hadn’t arrived, asking if she was in, Toni didn’t doubt that he could’ve laid his hands on her.

 

Even so, it’s true. It’s her shifts at the Wyrm and FP’s help that keep them going - he buys groceries for them, only the essentials, but Toni is convinced that they could’ve starved by now if it weren’t for Jug’s family. The boy may be an idiot, but he’s got a hell of a good father.

 

“What do we do then?” she asks, voice quieter than she intends it to be. She’s not scared. They’ve survived situations like this before, when Harry’s pay-check is a few days late. Or when Toni has to go running to her grandfather, tail between her legs, asking for ‘lunch money’ despite the fact that the only lunch she eats is whatever Sweet Pea and Fangs steal off whichever weak kid in the cafeteria is their target that week. She feels bad, always, but they usually pull out another five dollar bill from their pocket and go off to get another lunch tray - because they’re _Northsiders_ , and they can afford to eat lunch.

 

“We…” Harry trails off, and then he lets out a laugh, spinning around in the armchair and pointing his finger at her. She’s a little taken aback, but it’s not unusual behaviour when he’s drunk, or high, or whatever the chosen poison is. “ _You_ go to school. You’re the bright one, kiddo. So get on that bike and go.”

 

Toni smiles at him, because he’s trying his best. He doesn’t want her to worry, although she will, despite it all, because she knows that once she walks out of that door he’s going to be grabbing another beer, or even stumbling his way down to the Wyrm if his legs will hold him upright for long enough. But if she leaves now, she won’t be late, and she’ll have the whole day to think of a plan. They don’t come knocking on the door demanding the late fee, until at least four days after the letter, so she has time. In fact, the rent is only a day late, and there’s usually a few days leeway before they receive a late notice, and this has got to be their fourth one this year - Toni assumes it’s because the landowners have the buyers breathing down their necks, and they most likely need their books to be immaculate.

 

“Okay, Uncle Harry. I’ll see you later,” Toni says as she turns to grab her bag from its place on the chair by the front door. “Bye-” she lifts her hand to give him a wave, but he’s back in the armchair, facing away, beer bottle raised to his lips.

 

She sighs, grabbing her keys off the side table and wrenching the door open in a swift tug. “No worries, Toni. You’ll think of something - you always do.”

 

*

 

“She’s wearing a black shirt today. The usual ripped jeans, and a pink flannel tied around her waist. I think the shoes are Doc Martens, but it was hard to tell from a distance.”

 

Cheryl pushes her locker door closed, chuckling quietly at the sight of Veronica leant against the lockers, arms crossed over her chest. She raises her eyebrow in inquisition, because while her habit of staring at Toni is a much tired out joke that Veronica likes to taunt her with, they’re not in the business of keeping record of Toni’s outfits, so she’s a little confused as to why Veronica is telling her this.

 

“I’m sorry for making you late last night. You told me you wanted to be on time, and I didn’t listen,” Veronica tilts her head, a soft pout settling on her lips as she sticks out her hand, taking Cheryl’s before she can react. “Were your parents angry?”

 

Cheryl sighs quietly, taking a step forward, squeezing Veronica’s hand with a small shake of her head. “It’s okay Ronnie,” she says, giving her best friend a smile. “My mother wasn’t mad.”

 

Of course, that’s a lie. But Cheryl doesn’t want Veronica to feel guilty. It’s no secret that Penelope and Clifford aren’t contenders for ‘parents of the year’, but she’s almost certain that no one has any idea of just _how_ terrible they actually are. Aside from the one time that Veronica accompanied her father to a business meeting at Thornhill (only for her to be instructed to wait outside Clifford’s office for an hour), no one from school has ever set foot inside Thornhill. And, perhaps Cheryl feels grateful for that. Keeping up the facade of absolute ‘fineness’ at all times is hard enough when it’s her burden and hers alone to bear; she’s not sure if she could cope with it if she had to work to convince another person that she was indeed fine. As often, she really doubts that she is. Some days more than others…

 

“Oh good. I worried when you texted to say you didn’t need a lift this morning,” Veronica says, leaning in and wrapping her arms around Cheryl with a tight squeeze.

 

Cheryl almost flinches away from the unexpected motion of affection, but forces herself to remain still, allowing Veronica to hold onto her for a few moments - body stiff. She exhales in relief when her friend pulls away and gives her a smile. “It’s okay,” Cheryl repeats again, for lack of better words, although that seems to appease Veronica enough because she’s stepping away with a cheery clap of her hands.

 

“As long as you’re fine, then I must dash. Archie Andrews is saving a seat for me in math, and I wouldn’t want to keep that ginger stallion waiting!” Veronica exclaims, and Cheryl has to wonder how her other friends are able to withstand her being so loud and positive all of the time. She’s an excellent friend, yes, but she’s a little too intense for Cheryl to be able to spend more than a couple of hours with her, at most, before falling victim to a headache.

 

“Bye, Ronnie,” Cheryl smiles in return, hugging her english binder to her chest, as she shifts so that her bag is resting more comfortably on her back.

 

The corridor is starting to become a little busier, because the first bell had rung at some point while Veronica was speaking, and Cheryl can feel her chest tightening a little with anxiety. The crowded corridors are one of the reasons she likes to get to classes early, but she hadn’t wanted to rush to English today, in case Toni’s Serpent buddies came to find her again. She’s not feeling her best, and an incident as such could be enough to prompt her to tears.

 

Even so, she doesn’t want to be _late_ , so she hugs her folder even closer to herself and starts to weave her way through the bustling crowd, towards the English classroom. The teacher’s already there when she steps in, along with a few other students, and Cheryl is relieved, because the Serpents might be mean, and angry, but they’re not stupid enough to pick on her in front of a teacher. At least she doesn't think so. And lifting her head, she realises they’re not even here yet, only Josie who gives her a soft smile, Reggie Mantle, and—

 

 _Toni._ She’s sat in the chair beside Cheryl’s usual seat, and Cheryl panics for a second. There are only four seats at the back row, one either side of Toni’s, and one directly behind where Sweet Pea sits, and Cheryl isn’t brave enough to sit there. But she’s also not sure if Toni will mind her sitting next to her or not.

 

Inhaling sharply, she keeps her gaze fixed on the floor as she walks to the back of the classroom. She stops a little way from Toni’s desk, and the pink-haired girl looks up from her phone almost immediately, brow furrowing. She doesn’t look too happy, and Cheryl has to physically stop herself from taking a step back, of intimidation.

 

“What's up?” Toni asks, setting her phone face down on her desk and crossing her arms across her chest.

 

“C-can I sit here?” Cheryl asks, quietly, voice trembling slightly as she points to the empty desk beside Toni. She tries to avoid talking at school as much as she can, and when she does, ninety-five percent of the time Veronica is at the receiving end of her speech. She occasionally holds a conversation with Josie, or Betty, but it’s always mostly one-sided and brief.

 

And so, speaking to the girl who she’s been crushing on for almost eighteen months is close to making her tremble from fear.

 

Toni gives her a weird look, that causes Cheryl to take a sharp inhalation of air, averting her gaze once more. “Why wouldn’t you? It’s your usual seat, isn’t it?” Toni says, tone slightly incredulous, and drawing Cheryl’s attention back to her again.

 

She stares at her, a little taken aback for a moment or two, before she’s blinking her eyes in quick succession and giving a nod. Sliding her bag off her shoulders, she sets it onto the floor, setting her folder on the desk and sliding into her seat. She wants to feel relieved, but Toni’s still unashamedly watching her, gaze filled with something that Cheryl can’t decipher. So she sits still in her seat, body tense, hands entwined with each other on the desk, because she’s a little scared to move.

 

“I’m not going to whip out a knife and shiv you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

 

Cheryl’s breath hitches in her throat, and she turns to look at Toni, heart rate picking up a little in her chest. “I-I… I know that,” she chokes out, stumbling a little over her words. Her cheeks burn and she can feel her throat drying up.

 

“Okay, but you look like you’re either about to explode from holding your breath, or snap from how tense your back is. And I’m just saying that you can relax a little, Blossom,” Toni rolls her eyes, but it doesn't seem malicious.

 

Cheryl frowns a little and nods, re-adjusting her position so that she’s leant back slightly in her chair, and forcing a breath of air into her lungs. Sparing Toni a glance, the girl is looking at her again, a slightly bemused smile on her face. She doesn’t look as frustrated as she did a few moments ago, and it puts Cheryl a little more at ease. She does her best to give a smile in return, to which Toni lets out a quiet chuckle, before turning her attention back to her phone.

 

The last bell rings just as she does, and right on time, Sweet Pea and Fangs burst in through the door. The teacher looks up, lips curled downwards in distaste and irritation as she hushes them promptly. Fangs just laughs louder, his gaze scanning over the classroom, and Cheryl can feel herself stop breathing again, dread looming over her as she drops her gaze to her desk.

 

“Topaz, why are you sitting with that freak?” Fangs’ voice cuts through the subliminal murmurs currently filling the classroom, and Cheryl tenses once more in her seat. The heads of the other students in the classroom turn to look at her, and Cheryl’s eyes are suddenly burning with tears, knuckles white as she grips onto the edge of her desk.

 

“Mr Fogarty, that’s enough. Sit down right now, or you’ll be seeing the principle,” the teacher says, firmly.

 

Fangs grumbles in complaint, and Cheryl peeks up quickly in time to see him throw her a glare before he slumps into a seat on the other side of the room, his arms folding across his chest. She inhales shakily, reaching up to harshly wipe away a tear that had escaped her eye, bowing her head once more, and trying to ignore the gaze of a girl who’s name she doesn’t know that is still lingering on her - her eyes are all but burning holes in the side of Cheryl’s head with the intensity of her gaze, and Cheryl sinks lower in her seat to try and avoid it. She’s surprised when she hears Toni’s chair scraping against the linoleum floor, and she’s leaning forward to poke the girl in the back with a pencil. Cheryl bites back a quiet gasp of shock.

 

“Turn the fuck around, moron,” Toni hisses, the point of her pencil jabbing the girl’s shoulder again, and she’s quick to spin back around and return her attention to the front of the classroom.

 

Cheryl peers over at Toni, through her hair that has fallen over her face like a copper curtain, and Toni’s already looking at her. Cheryl brushes her hair behind her ear, opening her mouth to say something, taking a sharp breath in, but she’s met with a small shake of the head from the Serpent.

 

“It’s no big deal, Blossom,” Toni mumbles.

 

Cheryl’s starting to believe that maybe it is.

 

*

 

“What’s the deal with you and the Blossom chick? She’s fucking _weird_ , Toni.”

 

Toni rolls her eyes, sitting back against Sweet Pea’s couch with a sigh. His trailer is a lot cleaner, and even a little bigger than hers. So is Fangs’, but every inch is covered with either kids’ toys or actual kids, and at times even he needs a break from his constantly screaming siblings. He’s a good brother though, a really good brother, and Toni knows she would’ve been lucky to have a big brother like him growing up.

 

“Her brother died, Pea. Can you just… Back off her a little?” Toni asks, sighing heavily and kicking her feet up on the coffee table as she turns to look at Fangs. “You made her cry today, man. I’m all for putting people in their places, but what has she ever done to you?”

 

Fangs sits forward, the beer can in his hand crackling under the pressure with which he’s squeezing it. “What has she _done_ ? Fuck, Tiny, they’re taking away our homes. They’re all the same, and we don’t mean shit all to them! They’re arrogant and entitled, and they’re taking our _homes_ … What part of that doesn’t get through to you? If we lose the trailer park, we lose our trailers. We’re going to be literally homeless and even if we can find some place to squat, my mom’s too sick, Tiny, and you really think my siblings can survive that? So…That’s what she’s done - what they’ve all fuckin’ done.”

 

He’s turned red in the face, his beer can entirely crushed in his hand, sat forward in the armchair. He’s angry, of course he is, that much he’s entitled to. That, they’re _all_ entitled to. But Toni just wishes he understood that Cheryl Blossom isn’t the person that he’s angry at. She’s simply an easy target for his pain, otherwise why isn’t he taking it out on Veronica Lodge too? No doubt her father plays an equally as big role in the sale as Cheryl’s does. But she isn’t going to be able to convey that without giving him an aneurysm or something.

 

She purses her lips, exhaling shakily and nodding. “Yeah,” she sighs simply, giving him a nod to appease his rage. “I guess you’re right.”

 

“Course he is,” Sweet Pea nods in agreement, glancing at the beer stain on his carpet as a result of Fangs’ rant. He then stands up, walking to the fridge and bringing three new cans back over, passing them out despite the fact that Toni’s barely taken a sip of her first. Beer isn’t her drink. In fact, she doesn’t like to drink alcohol at all. She’s seen firsthand how badly it can mess you up, how badly it’s messed her _uncle_ up. She doesn’t ever want to live her life like that.

 

“I’ve got to come up with rent money by the end of the week or we’re out. This is our fourth late this year, _last time_ was our final chance,” Toni says, dragging a hand through her hair with a heavy sigh. If there’s anyone she can talk to about this, it’s the boys. They’re jerks sometimes, yes, but they’re her brothers. They’ve been by her side ever since they were five years old and running around the trailer park together, bare foot and carefree. Toni’s parents were still around, her uncle still stably on the wagon, Fangs’ mom was healthy, his dad not working three jobs to cover the expenses of medical bills and five kids, Sweet Pea’s dad hadn’t bailed yet, and his sister wasn’t hooked on opioids. Definitely the better days.

 

“Harry’s still out of work?” Fangs doesn’t sound angry anymore, in fact his voice is bordering on empathetic, and Toni is glad that their rare but intense arguments never serve to drive a wedge between them for long.

 

She sighs, offering a tight smile and a nod. It’s always the same, they know that by now. “His time is split between the Wyrm and the living room arm chair,” she leans her elbow against the arm of the couch so that she can rest her head on her hand, shaking it slightly as she bites down on her lip. “I’m working almost every day, and that only covers food, basics, and Byrdie wont let me put my name down for any weekend shifts. So aside from going to FP for a loan, which… I _really_ don’t want to do - I’m out of options.”

 

“Tiny, I could ask my-” Sweet Pea begins, and Toni sits forwards, holding up a finger to silence him.

 

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” she says, shaking her head as she stares at him firmly. “We’ve always been able to talk to each other, right? That’s how it is. Don’t start with that now, Pea, because I’m not telling you for charity and pity, I’m telling you because I need you two to put your dumb heads together and help me come up with something.”

 

Sweet Pea snorts quietly, raising his hands in a gesture of mock surrender. “Okay, point taken. But maybe you shouldn’t insult us when asking for our help- Ouch!” He barely dodges the tissue box that comes flying towards his head, prompting both Toni and Fangs to burst out laughing.

 

“It didn’t even brush you, you big oaf,” Toni says between laughs, reaching out to give Fangs a fist bump.

 

A minute or so longer off Sweet Pea’s fake angry grumbles, Toni and Fangs still laughing at him, and then they settle again, suddenly all remembering the serious nature of the conversation that they had been having. Toni sighs, slumping down in her seat again. “I might just sell some stuff,” she mutters, glancing up in time to see the boys’ surprised expressions. “Relax, I don’t mean drugs. Just old things that I don’t need anymore. If I combine that with extending my week day hours and cutting out some of the food shopping… I might be able to scrape it together. Harry says we’re just short, but I’m not sure that we have any of it. I think he spent it.” On booze, drugs, you name it.

 

Sweet Pea reaches out his leg, nudging hers with his foot. “My mom likes you more than she does me, Tiny. You’re welcome for dinner any day, okay? She’d kick my ass if she knew you were going hungry and I hadn’t invited you round.”

 

Toni chuckles, allowing herself to smile again as she nods. “Cheers. I might take you up on that; your mom’s macaroni Wednesday is not to be missed.”

 

The rest of the afternoon consists of similar banter between them, the heavy stuff brushed under the carpet within a few minutes, because they’re never able to remain serious for too long. Toni leaves Sweet Pea’s trailer at five-thirty, to head to the Wyrm. She’s working until midnight, and she knows that she’s going to be exhausted tomorrow, and aware that she’s done none of her homework, but the tips get better the later it is, and she’s just hoping that she’s able to scrape the cash together.

 

She has to be able to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my twitter is @chxrylblossomx if any of you are interested in occasional info about my fics, etc haha. hope u enjoyed!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a new chapter ladies, gents and all other human beans! hope you enjoy!

 

Cheryl hates lunchtimes. Especially lunchtimes when the library is too busy, and so she finds herself sitting alone at the back of one of the empty classrooms, hoping that a teacher doesn’t find her and tell her off for being in here.

 

This particular lunchtime, she’s sat at a desk at the back of the classroom, sketchbook open in front of her as she lightly shades in the wisps of hair hanging over Jason’s face. He’s all she can draw, recently. His face is prominent in her mind, sometimes bright and smiling, the others sad and twisted. She’s glad that her mother and father stopped their weekly searches of her room a couple of years ago, because if they found her sketchbook, each page containing a new sketch of her beloved brother, they’d no doubt throw it into one of Thornhill’s many fires to burn.

 

She’s just about to reach into her bag for her lunch, when the door opens a little, enough for a streak of light from the hall to illuminate part of the dark classroom. Cheryl snaps her sketchbook closed quickly, upon instinct, sitting up straight in her chair. If it’s a teacher, maybe she can pretend she was upset and just wanted to sit by herself for a while. They probably wouldn’t tell her off, she’s never been caught breaking a rule before anyway.

 

She blinks her eyes at the dark silhouette in the doorway, unable to make out who it is until they reach out to turn on the above-head lights and… Cheryl almost winces in surprise at the sight of Toni. She’s has her arms crossed over her chest, and her gaze scans the almost empty classroom before falling to settle on Cheryl.

 

She opens her mouth to speak, and Cheryl is prepared for a mean comment, or at the very least a sarcastic quip. But she’s taken by surprise instead. “Do you mind some company?” Toni asks. Her voice sounds sincere, _human_ , and she’s looking to Cheryl as if she really cares about her reply.

 

Cheryl isn’t sure why she’s asking - even if she did mind (which she most definitely does _not_ ) she would never be able to say no to Toni Topaz without expiring from fear. Or maybe even being beaten to a pulp by Fangs and Sweet Pea.

 

Cheryl nods her head quickly, glancing to the desk at her left and then back to Toni again. “Sure. Y-you can, um, sit,” she wants to kick herself for the tremble in her voice, but she settles with averting her gaze down to the cover of her sketchbook to distract herself from the imminent anxiety.

 

“Lights on or off?” Toni asks, finger hovering over the light switch. The daylight from outside that filters in through the thin blinds is just enough to provide light for Cheryl to draw by, but not so much so that it brings on a migraine like the blinding floodlights in the ceiling.

 

“Off, please,” she says quietly, and within a couple of seconds the room is back to its previous near-darkness.

 

She wonders whether Toni will sit by her, or on the other side of the room. Maybe she doesn’t mean actual company, she just wants to know if she could sit in this room too… Her train of thoughts is cut off, though, when Toni begins to make her way across the room, pausing a row away from her, before she slides into the desk next to Cheryl’s.

 

“Thanks,” she says simply, slumping down in the seat with a quiet sigh. Cheryl’s unsure what Toni’s thanking her for, but she gives a small smile and a nod, even so, her finger tracing the spine of her sketchbook as she watches Toni slide her jacket off her shoulders and sets it on the back of her seat.

 

Toni glances over, and Cheryl ignores the urge to look away before Toni realises she’s looking at her. The Serpent is staring at Cheryl’s sketchbook, and she feels a second of panic even though it’s firmly closed. She’s never shown a drawing of hers to anyone but Veronica and Jason; it just feels far too personal to share, but Toni’s gaze conveys curiosity.

 

“What’s that?” she asks eventually, and Cheryl stiffens.

 

She drums her fingers against the cover for a moment, swallowing the lump in her throat. “My sketchbook,” she replies, quietly, hands tightening around it. Toni herself hasn’t exactly been mean to her yet, but her friends have, and if she takes it from her, Cheryl’s certain she would cry.

 

“You draw?” Toni sounds interested, and Cheryl is surprised, maybe a little pleased, prompting her to look up with a small smile and a quick nod. “Can I see?”

 

Cheryl falters, her gaze dropping to the cover again, finger tracing up the spine. She doesn’t want to have to say no, and risk Toni hating her again. At some point, they seem to have crossed the line from her being no one, in the Serpent’s eyes, to her being a human being - mildly worth conversing with. She doesn’t want to undo that.

 

Toni seems to sense her trepidation, because she shakes her head, drawing Cheryl’s attention to her again. “You can say no, Blossom. It’s okay,” she says, voice softer than Cheryl’s ever heard it. It’s a little strange because usually people use her last name as an insult, or when they hear it they cringe and turn their heads. The same name that she and Jason had always been told to bear with pride, is something that brings her shame and fear. But hearing Toni say it, like that, so gently… Cheryl’s stomach flips.

 

“Sorry,” she replies, even so, her cheeks burning as she hugs the sketchbook to her chest, providing herself with a little comfort.

 

“No big deal,” Toni replies, and the three words that she’s growing used to hearing Toni say make her smile a little.

 

She looks over Toni for a moment or two, feeling a moment of boldness. “Don’t you h-have lunch?” she asks, voice still quiet as she slides her sketchbook back into her bag.

 

Toni shrugs and shakes her head. “Nah. Three dollars is too pricey for a slice of soggy pizza and four rock hard fries.” She attempts to look nonchalant as she speaks, but Cheryl takes note of how she swallows and shifts a little in her seat.

 

Cheryl reaches into her bag, pulling out the little tupperware box containing a peanut butter and jelly sandwich cut in half. She takes one of the slices out for herself, and then leans across to place the box on Toni’s desk, nudging it towards her. She’s not sure why Toni doesn’t have lunch, and she doesn’t want to jump to false conclusions, but she has a sandwich that she usually only eats half of anyway, and she doesn’t see why she shouldn’t share it.

 

Toni looks up, frowning slightly as she looks at Cheryl. There’s a moment of silence where Cheryl’s remains still, feeling a little scrutinised under Toni’s gaze, and then the Serpent gives a small nod. “Thank you, Cheryl,” she says, voice only a little more than a whisper, and Cheryl isn’t sure if she imagines the roughness to her tone. Even if she doesn’t, Toni’s soon clearing her throat, taking the half of the sandwich out of the box and passing it back over to her.

 

Cheryl doesn’t respond, she simply tucks the box away in her bag, along with her sketchbook and gives Toni a smile.

 

She’s just finished her half of the sandwich when Toni’s voice breaks the strangely comfortable silence that they had settled into. “I’m sorry that my friends were such jerks to you. I mean, they have a reason but… It’s not really your fault,” Toni says, crossing one leg over the other and shifting slightly in her seat to face Cheryl more.

 

Cheryl tilts her head, biting down on her lip as she studies Toni’s face. She’s trying her best not to stare, but she’s attempting to mentally formulate the question that she wants to ask. “Wh-what is it? The reason,” she says quietly, after a few more moments of silence. Toni frowns a little at that, so Cheryl looks away quickly, drumming her fingers against her desk, tongue darting out to wet her lips before she continues, “They said… S-something about my parents. I don’t know what they meant.” She clamps her mouth tightly shut after that, the anxiety swirling around in her stomach making her fearful of her sandwich resurfacing.

 

“Well, they meant about the deal that your father and Hiram Lodge are trying to put through,” Toni says, simply, frowning a little more as her eyes scan over Cheryl’s face. Cheryl is not sure what she’s expecting to see, because she’s simply confused. “Oh… You don’t know, do you?”

 

Cheryl swallows, shaking her head. Her father doesn’t talk business with her. He used to with Jason - they would spend hours in his study, discussing things that her brother was never allowed to tell her about. Sometimes he’d even be let into Clifford and Hiram’s secret meetings, and when he came out he’d be very silent and thoughtful. Cheryl never minded, and she never much cared to know what went on inside those walls. But right now she wishes that she wasn’t sat here, so clueless and oblivious, because clearly there’s something that she _should_ know.

 

“Your father and Hiram are trying to buy our land. The Serpents - we live in Sunnyside trailer park. They’re trying to buy it from our landlord, which will include our trailers too, and will render us homeless,” Toni sighs, slumping back against her seat once more. “It’s a big plot of land, I guess it has potential. I don’t know, but either way, I’m not sure what the chances are of it not going through.”

 

Cheryl bites down on her lip, her leg starting to bounce slightly with anxiety and she fixes her gaze back on her desk to try and keep herself controlled. Why would her father want to buy land on the Southside? He hates the Southside and all the people there, why would he want to set up a business project right in the middle of their turf?

 

“It’s not your fault. I- well, we all thought you would’ve known,” Toni says softly, and Cheryl feels her stomach flip again at the gentle tone with which she speaks.

 

But she forces herself to take a trembling breath in, meeting Toni’s gaze and finding a little solace in her warm brown orbs. “I-I’m so sorry, Toni. I d-didn’t… I didn’t have any idea,” her voice is shaking worse than before, but she’s doing her best to keep it under control. She just wishes her anxiety wouldn’t peak at the most inconvenient times.

 

“ _Cheryl_. It’s not your fault,” Toni says, again, voice firmer this time, but also impossibly softer. She’s staring at the red-haired girl, eyes intense and insistent, and Cheryl almost cowers under her gaze, equally though, feeling so calm staring into her eyes. “We can’t be held accountable for our families, or their actions.”

 

Cheryl sighs quietly, but gives Toni a nod, lips twitching into a tiny smile. She’s surprised to find it reciprocated on the Serpent’s lips. She’s decidedly gorgeous when she smiles, something that Cheryl realised she hasn’t seen her do a lot. But she wants to see it more. She wants to be the _cause_ of it more.

 

“I have a lemon bar i-if you want to split it,” she says quietly, leaning down to pull out the little tin foil parcel. She keeps her gaze on Toni, smile turning into a shy grin when the girl gives an eager nod.

 

“How could I say no?”

 

*

 

Cheryl is enjoying the comfortable silence, looking out at the near still surface of Sweetwater river, the late afternoon sunshine still reflecting off the occasional ripples of the water. It’s a beautiful place; very serene and tranquil, and Cheryl likes coming here to attempt to order her thoughts, no matter how messy and chaotic they may be.

 

It’s the last place she ever saw Jason, and while someone may think that would make it an upsetting place for her, she has nothing but beautiful memories here. When she had said farewell to her brother - she had been smiling, as had he. He hadn’t been going far, he’d told her he was ‘ _going to see to a few things. Don’t worry about it, Cherry, I’ll be back before you know it.’_ He couldn’t tell her more than that. She was his alibi to Penelope - she was to tell her that they had just taken a trip to the river.

 

Cheryl had never asked too many questions about Jason’s plans for the afternoon, and while in hindsight she wishes she had, the idea of trying to find out _now_ is too painful. To find out, would almost be worse, to think it could’ve been a trivial meet up with Reggie or another one of his friends that essentially resulted in his death… She would rather focus on the healing of her heart, after losing the person dearest to her in the entire world, although she isn’t sure she can ever entirely heal. Not while she knows that she was the one who rowed him across that river, the one who returned hours later to find he wasn’t at their meeting point at the agreed time, the one who waited another further hour before returning home to tell their mother, heart racing in panic. She was the one who stayed by the fire, her whole body trembling with anxiety as Sheriff Keller and his men searched the woods along with her parents, the one who sat by the phone and received the most dreadful call of her life, to tell her that Jason, _Jason was dead_ , and—

 

This isn’t the place, though. This is her place for _happy_ memories of her brother. So she blinks her eyes harshly shut to force away those memories.

 

Instead, she remembers his smile - and it’s as vivid as a photograph in her mind. She hopes it will remain imprinted on her brain forever, because Jason will always be the most important person in her life. And his smile was always able to bring her out of her deepest sadness - whether that was a twin thing, or just an attribute of Jason himself, Cheryl still isn’t sure.

 

But here, she feels a little happier than most places. Elsewhere, the mere thought of her brother is enough to leave her with a heavy heart. But here, she’s able to at least attempt to relax. Just as she is now, with the birds tweeting their soft tunes as a melodic background to her fast-paced thoughts, she’s able to feel… A semblance of calm, which is unusual and yet definitely welcome.

 

But of course, when in the company of Veronica Lodge, silence is a very temporary thing.

 

“Do you think he actually likes me? I’ve seen the eyes that he gives Betty, and I’m a _Lodge_ , I refuse to chase after a man whose heart belongs to another. But… He’s more heavenly than Zac Efron on rollerskates,” Veronica lets out a dreamy sigh, slumping back against the rocky shore of the river as she does.

 

Cheryl turns to look at her, lips curled upwards slightly in amusement. Veronica is a bit of an enigma to her sometimes, she says the most unusual things, and everything that she does is tinted with the dramatic flair that she’s so renowned for. But Cheryl loves her best friend. And so she tolerates her sometimes excessive chattiness and thespianism.

 

“He likes you, Ronnie,” she says, pulling her skirt over her knees as she crosses her legs, shifting slightly on the uncomfortable rock they’re seated on. “Betty is… Not his type,” she’s careful to word her sentence tastefully so as not to offend Veronica’s other best friend.

 

Veronica makes a small noise of agreement, leaning back against her elbows as she looks up at Cheryl. “How about your _belle_? Are Toni and her little gang still being horrible?” she asks, head tilting to the side slightly.

 

Cheryl bites down on her lip, shaking her head as she thinks back to lunchtime. Toni had been so _different_ to how Cheryl has known her to be before. She was actually, genuinely kind, and she didn’t roll her eyes nor make a snarky comment once. After Cheryl had given her half of her lemon bar, Toni spent the remaining twelve minutes of lunch making jokes about various different teachers in the school. Cheryl was able to laugh, even adding a few comments of her own, without feeling as scared or anxious as she would expect herself to be in that situation.

 

Toni isn’t as mean and bitchy as she wants people to think she is.

 

“Toni’s not horrible,” Cheryl replies simply because, for a reason that she can’t quite identify, she doesn’t want to share the details of their conversation at lunch. She would rather it stay hers, for the time being. But suddenly she remembers the thing that Toni had told her, about her and Veronica’s fathers. She was curious to know if Veronica was just as in the dark as she was. “Ronnie?”

 

“Hm?” Veronica looks up again, giving a small nod telling her to go on.

 

Cheryl hummed quietly, sighing as she rested back against a rock behind her. “Do you know anything about the, um… Business deal that our parents are working on?” she asks, tapping her fingers against her thigh, and doing her best to sound nonchalant.

 

Veronica frowns, remaining silent for a few moments before she sits up completely. “That piece of land on the Southside?” she asks, tilting her head. “They’re trying to buy it, to renovate and build on, I think. Daddy won’t talk too much about it, but since I’m an official shareholder of Lodge Industries he was obligated to tell me. Why, Cherry?”

 

“I was just curious,” Cheryl responds, lifting her shoulders into a small shrug as she tries not to react to the nickname. She still doesn’t understand, but now she’s aware that Veronica is more informed than she is, it’s probable that she will be the best source of information on this.

 

Veronica seems satisfied enough, because she hums, giving a nod, and leaning her head against Cheryl’s shoulder. Cheryl does her best not to stiffen, but for the most part, she fails. Veronica doesn’t seem to mind though, because she doesn’t move away, and so Cheryl settles back against the rock so that she can keep herself and Veronica upright.

 

“Won’t your parents be wondering where you are?” Veronica asks, suddenly, and once again she breaks the short-lived silence that had settled over them.

 

Cheryl shakes her head, almost nudging Veronica off her shoulder in the process. “They’re at a meeting in Greendale,” she informs Veronica, and she wonders whether it’s something to do with their Southside deal. She doesn’t dwell on it though, instead finding it almost laughable that Veronica thinks she would be sat here with her if her parents were home. They’ve been out of school for forty-five minutes. Penelope would probably chain her to her bed, or something of that magnitude.

 

“In that case, will you come to Pop’s with me to meet Betty, Jughead, and the paladin of my dreams?” Veronica looks up at her in excitement, and Cheryl feels her anxiety start to build up again.

 

Veronica’s friends are just as loud and talkative as she is, combined with the fact that Cheryl probably wouldn’t be able to stay long in case her parents did end up coming home early, and Veronica probably wouldn’t want to leave to give her a lift home…

 

“Maybe n-next time, Ronnie,” Cheryl says, shaking her head slightly and giving her friend a small pat on the shoulder. “Will you drive me home now, please?”

 

Veronica nods, sitting up and placing a brief kiss to Cheryl’s cheek that makes her jump a little, eyes wide and blinking in surprise. Veronica laughs quietly, squeezing Cheryl’s arm as she jumps to her feet and sticks out her hand. Cheryl takes it, getting to her feet and starting towards the car.

 

“What was it that you were saying about Toni?” Veronica asks, once she’s buckling up her seat belt and starting the engine.

 

Cheryl smiles at the mention of the Serpent’s name, shrugging a little as she settles into the passenger's seat. “I just said she wasn’t horrible,” she mutters, unintentionally flushing, and leaning forward to fiddle with the radio until it lands on one of the stations she likes. “Her friends don’t like me because our parents are buying the land where they live.”

 

“Wait, really?” Veronica sound surprised, and Cheryl raises her eyebrows, giving a nod. “I knew it was on the Southside, but I didn’t know it was the trailer park. That explains why Jughead is all but giving me the cold shoulder.”

 

Cheryl nods, sighing softly and dropping her gaze to her lap. She’s angry at her father for doing this. There are lots of people like Toni and her friends whose families live there and will be left _homeless_ if this deal goes through. Just because, what, he wants to make some money of a few buildings on the site? It’s not good enough, and while she’s still confused on the details, Cheryl doesn’t like it at all.

 

She wishes that her family wasn’t going to be the one responsible for ruining any of the Serpents’ lives… But especially not Toni’s. No, the last thing she wants is to ruin Toni’s life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know your thoughts!! i love hearing from you guys.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here it is! next chapter may be a littleee delayed since i have exams coming up and easter break will be spent studying solidly! but hopefully i'll be able to put it out on time. enjoy!

 

Cheryl spends almost the whole of her lunch hour waiting to see if Toni will show up again. She doesn’t, though, and Cheryl tries not to be disappointed. She isn’t even friends with Toni; they shared her lunch one time and spent half an hour together. That doesn’t make them anything. She’s giving it more meaning than she should, because of her ridiculously placed crush on the southside girl.

 

Toni isn’t the type of person to become even _friends_ with someone like her, Cheryl knows she should have accepted that by now.

 

The next day she’s not quite as disappointed when Toni doesn’t show up again. She decides that it was a one time thing. And she has to be okay with that, because Toni is far too high up in the high school hierarchy to be caught dead with her.

 

But she can’t stop thinking about how different Toni had seemed - how _nice_ and _kind_ she had been. Cheryl hadn’t been sure that she had a side like that to her, and now that she’s seen that in fact Toni _can_ be more than the ‘big bad gang member’ that she shows herself to be… Cheryl’s thinking about her more than ever.

 

That becomes even more evident in her last class of the day - history. Her mind is drifting, she’s distracted and deep in her thoughts, her pencil idly pinched between her fingers. It isn’t until the end of the day bell rings that Cheryl is brought back to reality and finds that at some point she managed to create a very lifelike sketch of Toni spanning across three quarters of her lined sheet of paper, beneath a half-hearted paragraph about historical appeasement. It’s a light sketch; a single layer of pencil only, but it’s very distinguishably _Toni_.

 

There’s a line of small hearts traced above her head, and Cheryl thinks that’s where she began doodling. Cheeks flushing a deep red, she’s quick to crumple up the sheet and stuff it deep into her backpack, along with her history folder and pencil case, before she’s making her way out of the classroom, trying to beat the rush as usual. She stops by her locker, just about to put in her combination when she feels her phone buzz in her pocket. Knowing it’s either Veronica or her mother, Cheryl pulls it out, eyes scanning over the notification lighting up her screen.

 

**ronnie [3:37pm]**

_hey cherry i’m so sorry i forgot that i promised betty i’d stick around to help her with a thing for the blue+gold. are you going to be okay to get another ride home?_

 

Cheryl groans softly, leaning back against her locker with a sharp exhale of dismay. If she’s late home again, just four days after the last time, her mother will go _crazy._ Either that or her father will be sure to ‘teach her a lesson’ that will leave her with the bruises to show for it, for at least a couple of weeks.

 

Panic begins to rise in her chest, and Cheryl clenches her fists at her sides to try and keep herself calm. She should be a pro at it by now, but when it comes to her parents, she can never manage to keep her anxiety under control-

 

“What’s up, Red?”

 

Cheryl flinches in surprise at the sound of a voice from behind her. Turning around, she’s surprised to find herself faced with Toni, arms across her chest, a smirk plastered on her face. It’s not quite the soft smile that Cheryl had been the receiver of two days ago, but it’s better than the eye rolls and raised eyebrows that she was beginning to become accustomed to.

 

She gives as best of a smile as she can, rubbing her hand up her thigh as she stands up a little straighter. “H-hello,” she responds, a little cautiously, because she’s still not sure where she stands with Toni, and she’s still a little nervous of her. But it’s becoming more of the _good_ type of nervous.

 

“Hey.” Toni’s eyes scan over her face for a moment, before she frowns a little. “But, seriously, what’s up?” she asks, and Cheryl is surprised.

 

Does Toni… care? About her? It seems strange, and a little implausible, so she shrugs the thought away, gaze falling to her feet.

 

“My ride is b-busy, and I… I’m meant to be home soon,” she says, catching her lip between her teeth. She can feel Toni watching her, and as she peers up, her darker brown eyes meet Toni’s warm brown ones.

 

Toni is smiling ever so slightly, and she gives a small shrug. “I‘ll give you a ride,” she offers.

 

Cheryl’s eyes widen in surprise, and she stares at her for a moment. “Why would you do that for me?” she asks, tilting her head in confusion. Veronica gives her a lift because she’s her best friend, and Toni… Well, Toni should hate her. And Cheryl was pretty certain that she did… up until a few days ago.

 

“Because you need a lift, and I can fit you on the back of my bike,” Toni breathes a quiet chuckle, eyes still fixed on Cheryl’s. “You can say no, if you like, I’m not going to be offended.”

 

“Y-your _motorbike_ ?” Cheryl blinks, swallowing harshly. She’s never ridden a motorcycle - she’s never so much as been within two feet of one. Her parents not only believe that motorbikes are dangerous, but they look down on those who ride them as well. Her father especially, whenever one passes, he tightens his jaw and makes a sound of blatant disapproval. Cheryl wonders whether it’s specifically to do with the Serpents. But either way, if he or her mother caught her, or heard about her riding on a _motorbike_...

 

Toni seems to soften a little after observing her reaction, her lips curling upwards slightly into a smile that warms Cheryl’s chest a little. If she was a little braver she would tell her that she should smile more often. “Have you never ridden on a motorbike before?” Toni asks.

 

Cheryl blinks her eyes quickly at the question, and she shakes her head fervently.

 

“Didn’t think so,” Toni chuckles, glancing down at her watch and shrugging. “Your friend drives you, right? However long it takes them to get you home, my bike will get you there in half the time.”

 

Cheryl hesitates, shifting on her feet a little. She’s still not sure why Toni would want to do this for her, why she’s being so nice when her friends seem to hate Cheryl’s guts. But even so… She _really_ needs to get home. “Okay,” she says, decidedly, after a few more moments of hesitation, “Yes please… Thank you.”

 

“No big deal,” Toni says, smiling more, and Cheryl wants to chuckle softly at Toni’s repeated use of those three words that she seems to like so much, but instead she simply gives a smile and a nod.

 

Toni starts walking before Cheryl even has time to grab the books she was planning on getting from her locker, and instead of asking her to wait, she simply scurries after her, trying to keep up, but Toni walks surprisingly quickly for someone with such short legs. Maybe it’s because she just barges through the crowd, not caring about the dirty looks she receives until they realise that it’s _Toni Topaz_ , unlike Cheryl who is careful to avoid bumping into anyone, arms hugged tightly to her body as she does. Cheryl loses track of Toni, and by the times she’s out of the doors, Toni is already stood by a motorbike that’s parked just to the left of the front building.

 

“I lost you, back there,” Toni chuckles softly, holding out a helmet to Cheryl. “If it’s too loose, let me know and I’ll tighten it for you.”

 

Cheryl takes the helmet, frowning softly as she checks the bike and looks to Toni. “What about you?” she asks, and she can’t hide her very real concern. She knows it’s definitely not safe to be riding a motorcycle around without a helmet on, not even a small town like Riverdale where the roads are quieter than most.

 

“What about me, Red?” Toni asks, raising her eyebrows.

 

“Y-your… head.” Cheryl blinks in confusion when Toni laughs, because she’s deadly serious when she says she doesn’t want to see Toni Topaz’s brain explode or something if she happens to accidentally drive head first into a tree.

 

“I don’t wear a helmet usually, anyway. There’s barely any road traffic in Riverdale and I’ve been riding since I was twelve. But I figured there was no way I could get you on _without_ one,” Toni smirks a little, giving Cheryl a small nod. “Just put it on.”

 

Cheryl hesitates, before sighing and slipping it on over her head, clipping it up at the bottom. Toni watches, nodding in approval and pulling the keys out of her jacket pocket.

 

Jumping on the bike in a motion that can be described as nothing less than _graceful_ , she starts the engine and looks back at Cheryl over her shoulder. “You gonna get on?” she asks, and Cheryl adjusts her bag on her back before sitting herself down on the back of Toni’s bike, leaving a small gap between them.

 

Toni chuckles softly, shaking her head. “You’re gonna have to hold onto my waist. Really tight so that you don’t go flying off.” Toni pauses as Cheryl shuffles forward uncertainly, her hands landing to rest awkwardly on Toni’s waist, fingers trembling a little. Cheryl’s cheeks redden as she does, and she’s starting to wonder whether accepting Toni’s offer for a ride was a good idea.

 

“It’s okay, Cheryl. I don’t bite. Just wrap your arms around my waist, okay?” Her voice is that special tone of soft again, that Cheryl had never heard her use before two days ago, at lunch.

 

It gives her a burst of bravery and she leans forward, arms wrapping around Toni’s midsection. Still not very tight, but her chin is resting against Toni’s back, and she’s painfully aware of how close she is to the girl that she’s had a crush on _forever._ Her heart is hammering so fast in her chest that Cheryl is certain that Toni must be able to feel it too.

 

“D-do… You know where I live?” Cheryl asks, her voice muffled through the helmet, but Toni obviously hears her because she nods.

 

“There aren’t all that many mansions in Riverdale,” Toni chuckles, “do you want me to drop you around the corner? I don’t imagine your parents would be too happy to see you rock up on a Serpent’s motorbike now, would they?”

 

Cheryl blushes slightly but nods. She wonders how much Toni knows about her parents.

 

“You ready?” the Serpent asks, as the bike lets out a low rumble, the engine making a roar and prompting Cheryl to let out a squeak of surprise. Toni laughs at that, revving the engine again. “I’ll take that as a yes. Hold on tight, okay?”

 

Cheryl nods against Toni’s back, despite the fact that she can’t see her, taking a deep breath in through her nose as Toni starts off towards the parking lot exit.

 

It’s not as bad as she expects. The helmet cancels out a lot of the noise, and despite how cold she feels with the air whipping around her… She finds herself _maybe_ enjoying herself. It takes everything within her to not focus on the fact that her body is pressed flush against Toni’s back, because she may just pass out if she takes a second to actually think about that.

 

It’s over far sooner than she would’ve liked, and Toni is pulling to a stop just round the corner of Thornhill. Cheryl’s not sure how loud the bike is but she really hopes that her parents didn’t hear it - bikers never ride by the area where their house is, and they would undoubtedly find it suspicious if she arrived home shortly after hearing the rumble of a motorbike.

 

Cheryl’s arms slacken around Toni’s waist, and the pink-haired girl hops off, foot nudging out the kickstand and she extends her hand to Cheryl. “M’lady,” she says, teasingly. Cheryl giggles and takes her hand a little sheepishly, allowing Toni to help her off the bike.

 

Fumbling with the strap, Cheryl is able to unclip it and tug the helmet off, shaking her hair out as she inhales a large gulp of air. She notices Toni chuckling quietly as she looks at her, and tilts her head slightly in inquisition.

 

“Helmet hair,” Toni says, chuckling and reaching out her hand to brush Cheryl’s hair over her shoulder. Her hand brushes past her cheek, just barely, but enough to send a shiver down Cheryl’s spine. Toni’s lips twitch upwards a little more. “It’s a good look on you.”

 

Cheryl almost spontaneously combusts right there and then.

 

Her cheeks burn, and she looks down at her watch to try and disguise it. It takes her a moment or two to focus enough to figure out what it says, because her head feels a little fuzzy and her stomach is swirling with an unfamiliar warmth. She’s two minutes earlier than usual.

 

When she looks up again, admittedly having been staring at her watch for possibly a little too long, Toni has placed the helmet on her bike handlebars and is stood watching a Cheryl with her arms crossed. “So, how’d I do timewise, Blossom?” she asks.

 

“I’m early,” she smiles, hands sliding into the shallow pockets of her skirt and she rocks forwards slightly on her feet. “Toni, I-I really owe you one-” she begins, but stops when she finds herself being cut off.

 

“No, you don’t. You were nice to me without a second thought the other day, and you didn’t even have to be… You’re kind to _everyone_ , Cheryl, it doesn’t seem to matter who. Why is that?” Toni asks, head tilting to the side a little.

 

Cheryl blinks, frowning slightly. The thought of being horrible or unwelcoming to Toni hadn’t once crossed her mind, and she’s not sure why it would. This ‘kindness’ that Toni is describing could be partially explained by her feelings for the Serpent girl, but even so, Cheryl has never really felt inclined to be spiteful towards anyone aside from her parents (which she would never act upon anyway). And still, Cheryl’s not about to confess how she feels to Toni; even _if_ she’s showing herself to be a lot kinder than Cheryl had previously thought, there’s no doubt in her mind that it’s in a purely friendship way. Toni would probably laugh at her and join her friends in calling Cheryl a freak if she knew about her _perverse ways_ . Toni doesn’t need to know that she’s deviant _._

 

“Why not?” Cheryl responds quietly, feeling as though her answer is a little stupid, until Toni’s face breaks out into a grin. Bigger than Cheryl has ever seen her smile.

 

As soon as it appears, Toni is rushing to bite it back, giving a small nod, her own gaze dropping to the ground for a moment or two. Cheryl is a little confused until Toni looks up to meet her eye again, smile still in place. “That’s a good answer,” she says, sighing softly and nodding again. “The world would be a much nicer place if everyone thought like you do.”

 

Cheryl’s not too sure about that, but she smiles even so.

 

There’s a short silence between them, until Toni is giving a nod and stepping back towards her bike. “You should go. You said you had to be home quick, right?”

 

Cheryl hesitates, but then nods. “My, my parents…” she begins, catching her lip between her teeth. She doesn’t want it to seem like she’s rushing away, because honestly she would much rather stand here with Toni for as long as she other girl would want to stay, than return inside to that _hell hole._ But she’s not sure how to explain. She’s not excellent with articulating her words, especially not around people who make her nervous, and Toni does - even if it’s a good nervous.

 

“It’s okay. You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” Toni shakes her head slightly. “I get it.”

 

Cheryl wonders what exactly it is that Toni gets, and she finds herself wishing that she knew more about her. Even just the little things, she’d like to know something. But now isn’t the time for that, so she pushes those thoughts away and gives a nod, jaw clenching slightly as she glances up at the house. “Thank you, again, Toni _._ I’ll see you a-at school on Monday?”

 

Toni chuckles, hands closing around the handlebars of her bike as she glances at Cheryl again. “Yeah you will. Same place at lunch?”

 

Cheryl’s a little taken aback, but she’s nodding before she can think otherwise because, why would she ever say no? “I-I… Yes. Same, uh, same-” she wants to groan in embarrassment, her hands clenching into fists in her pockets.

 

Toni laughs quietly, though, and Cheryl relaxes because it’s not a mean laugh, it’s a… an affectionate one? She’s not sure, but even so, there’s not a trace of venom in it. “Cool. I’ll see you then, Cheryl.”

 

Cheryl’s doesn’t respond, but she smiles, big, watching as Toni jumps onto her bike. True to her word earlier, she doesn’t bother with the helmet, and Cheryl wants to scold her for it but she knows it’s not her place. She watches as Toni starts the engine and her bike rumbles to life, the roar of the engine making her cringe slightly, but probably not loud enough to be heard from within Thornhill. There’s a moment’s pause, and Toni glances over her shoulder, throwing her a wink, before all that’s left in her wake is a blur and a stifling cloud of exhaust fumes.

 

Cheryl can’t shake her happiness, not even as she strolls into her house three minutes late. Usually her hands would be trembling, especially after the happenings just days ago, but Penelope and Clifford aren’t even in sight. Smiling a little wider, she sets her bag down at the bottom of the stairs and heads up to her room.

 

She’s not quite sure what just happened - not entirely sure if that was all real. But there’s one thing she is sure of… that she’s screwed, because Toni Topaz is the most beautiful girl she’s ever met.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you guys thinkk :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys! sorry for the day's delay, i forgot it was friday yesterday! without further ado... chapter five :)
> 
> trigger warning for child abuse. like, it’s pretty heavy guys. please don’t read it if this is going to trigger/upset you. your mental health comes first.

 

Peace is something almost foreign to Cheryl - rare and hard to come by. With parents like Clifford and Penelope Blossom, her performance in every area of life never seems to reach quite a high enough standard to please. So she strives, as often as she can, to reach perfection and excellence. She works, studies, revises to ensure her grades are all As, if not A pluses. She does her best to obey, to follow their rules and, now more than ever, to be a good enough daughter to make up for the son they lost. It's constant worrying, a battle to impress; because to Penelope and Clifford, you’re either _perfect_ or you’re worthless, and Cheryl has found that for the most of her life she’s been viewed as the second option. Despite how hard she tries. Striving for perfection has never left her with much peace - not from her parents, not from her anxiety, the constant _whirlwind_ of her own mind—

 

But that’s all beside the point. Because, right now, lying on Jason’s bed with his pillow hugged tightly to her chest, the last beams of sunlight peeking in through the crack between the curtains… She finds herself feeling peaceful.

 

While it saddens her, Jason’s room also brings her comfort. Seeing his things, just as he had left them, just as he had last seen them - she’s not sure why, but it’s a definite consolation. A small one, but consoling all the same.

 

His pillow doesn’t smell of him any longer, and while that thought makes Cheryl’s eyes sting with tears, for once she doesn’t force the emotion away. She simply allows the single tear to slide down her cheek and land on her brother’s navy blue pillowcase. She misses Jason, more than she’s ever missed anyone, and she knows that if he were still around, he’d be the _first_ person she was running to tell about Toni. She isn’t exactly sure what she’d say, but he would be happy for her all the same. As long as she was happy, Jason would be happy for her.

 

It must be along that train of thoughts when she accidentally falls asleep, the covers up around her and Jason’s pillow hugged close. Because she’s not sure how much later it is when she becomes vaguely aware of a repeated _drumming_ in her subconscious. It’s getting louder and closer, and she quickly realises it’s not drumming, it’s-

 

Footsteps.

 

“Cheryl! Cheryl Marjorie Blossom, where are you?” Penelope is screaming, her tone laced with menace, and Cheryl feels her blood run cold. Her mother _hates_ her being in Jason’s room, her father hates it even more, but it’s much too late now, because Penelope is right outside the door.

 

It flies open, crashing against the dresser and making the floor tremble slightly. Penelope is stood there, hands on her hips, face red and flustered and showing an expression of deep anger. She’s holding something in her hand, Cheryl can’t quite figure out what, it looks like a piece of paper maybe, and… oh _no_. It’s her drawing of Toni.

 

“How many times have your father and I told you to stay out of here?” Penelope marches forward, her hand gripping Cheryl’s arm in much the same place as where her previous bruises were just starting to become less painful. Penelope yanks Cheryl off of the bed, fingers digging into her skin, and Cheryl winces, only just able to hold back a yelp of pain. “Not another sound out of you, you _deviant_ child.”

 

There’s that word. The word that brings tears to Cheryl’s eyes every time Penelope utters it, the word that gives her goosebumps and makes her feel disgusted with herself. She blinks her eyes shut and gives a tiny nod, her head spinning with slight disorientation, whether it’s the haze of sleep still lingering or the sick feeling in her stomach. Her eyes open, gaze shifting down to the crumpled up paper in Penelope’s hand, and she catches a flash of her brief drawing of Toni, surrounded by an arc of hearts.

 

“What, in the lord’s name, is _this_?” Penelope spits, holding the paper up, hatred burning in her eyes as she looks to Cheryl. “I won’t have this… Your disgusting behaviours, making themselves known again.”

 

Cheryl takes a step back, regretting it when she feels her back hit the wall, because Penelope has her cornered. “I-it’s just a drawing, Mommy,” she whimpers, voice barely above a whisper, hands trembling by her sides because… God, no, it’s so much more than that.

 

“Don’t talk back to me,” Penelope hisses, taking a step closer to Cheryl and effectively pushing her further back against the wall. “This is vile and perverse, Cheryl… I won’t have such things in my house.”

 

“I-I’m _sorry_ ,” Cheryl’s barely able to choke out, because she’s trembling so much, her jaw clenched to try to keep her tears back. Her eyes squeeze shut, and seconds later she feels a sharp pain against her face, followed shortly by another. She opens her eyes, staring up at her mother’s raised hand with a quiet whimper. She resists the urge to bring her hand up to touch her cheek, because despite how much it’s stinging she doesn’t want to _show_ her mother that.

 

“Just wait until your _father_ hears,” Penelope’s lips twitch upwards into a cruel smirk, face nearing Cheryl’s, and then her hand is gripping Cheryl’s chin, fingers squeezing hard enough to make her wince again. “What will it take to _fix you_ , Cheryl?”

 

Cheryl doesn’t respond, she can’t. She’s terrified, and she wants to beg her mother not to tell Clifford, because… Fuck. But that would just mean she’d won, and Penelope loves to win. Fear equals respect; and she’s nothing if not a woman who believes she’s worthy of everyone’s utmost respect.

 

“Suit yourself,” Penelope pulls her hand away, eyes scouring over her daughter for a moment before she steps back. “Get _out_ of Jason’s room. Now.”

 

Cheryl doesn’t waste any time in scrambling out of the door, making it to her own room, shutting the door firmly behind her, leaning against it with a harsh exhale of relief. Her cheek is stinging, her arm painful from her mother’s aggravation of her bruises, but she knows that this is nothing compared to what will happen when Clifford gets home.

 

The thought makes her heart rate speed up again, and not for the first time today, a single tear slides down her ivory cheek.

 

*

 

Cheryl can barely breathe through her tears, her chest aching with each gasp of air she tries to let into her lungs. Her entire body is stinging from her father’s wild attempts to chastise her with his belt. His movements had been much too frantic and angry to cause her any real _damage_ aside from a few bruises on her exposed skin, but it hurts like hell anyway. He’d ripped her drawing of Toni to shreds, before grabbing her sketchbook (which her mother had apparently looked through as well) ripping out pages at a time and screwing them up with aggression in each movement. That hurt the most, watching him shred up the memories she had of Jason. She’s _terrified_ that his image will erase itself from her mind, and all she’ll have left is a few faded photos…

 

She needs those drawings to keep Jason _with her._

 

At her panicked attempts to stop him, to grab her sketchbook back, she’d only wound up further hurt, her father throwing her back against the kitchen cabinets, no doubt bruising her back even more. As soon as his rampage had fizzled out, ending with him storming off upstairs - all but steaming from the ears - and Penelope following shortly after, Cheryl had gathered up as many of the tiny pieces of paper as she could, but she quickly realised it was all futile; there was no way she could fix those.

 

And so here she is, sat on her bed, body aching with each inhale of air and from each tiny movement.

 

She doesn’t know how she got from having such a _good_ day, to here. She hadn’t been able to wipe the smile from her face after Toni dropped her home, all but skipping inside. But of course, as usual, her parents had ruined that…

 

Cheryl takes another trembling breath in, lungs screaming in protest, and she simply hugs herself tighter. She hasn’t seen her father lose his temper with her like that for at least a month, and maybe she had forgotten how scary it was, and that was why she had been so careless. Of course they detected her deviant intentions behind that sketch, they barely trust Cheryl with Veronica and Cheryl has no doubts that if she wasn’t Hiram’s daughter then there would be interventions in their friendship.

 

Glancing at her bedside clock, the numbers are bright and glaring ‘ **_11:23_ **’. She wonders if Veronica is awake, and even reaches out for her phone, hand trembling, but she quickly realises that there’s no point because if she called her she would have to explain why she’s crying, and that’s a can of worms that Cheryl doesn’t want to open up.

 

Her body is aching, but she took a couple of Tylenol, and she’s praying for it to take effect soon so that she can get some sleep. She wouldn’t usually go to sleep this early on a Friday night, she likes to spend her evenings drawing, or watching old films if her parents have gone out for the evening. But she heard their voices from their room a few minutes ago, and she doesn’t want to risk doing anything to remind them of her presence. She’s aching and trembling too much to be able to deal with another telling off.

 

So she sits back against her bed, closing her eyes tightly in a vane hope that sleep might come.

 

*

 

“It’s crazy, Jones. You’re basically saying you want to break into a potential mobster’s house, essentially risking your _life_ , reliant on the vague possibility of finding something to use as blackmail material.”

 

Jughead squints his eyes, ruffling his hair and giving a small shake of his head. “Clifford Blossom isn’t a mobster, Toni,” he says, and Toni rolls her eyes violently, because is that really the only part of what she said that he chose to pick up on?

 

“Okay, maybe not, but he’s a dangerous man. If you’re smart you’ll know that, Jughead,” Toni sighs, leaning further into the back of Sweet Pea’s truck, pulling the blanket tighter around her shoulders. They hadn’t been sure why Jughead insisted they meet by Sweetwater River, but he’d told them it was a meeting of _sensitive_ _information_ and they needed a _private_ _location_. She hadn’t counted on them being out for this long and she was starting to wish she had brought a jacket for warmth, instead of the dirty red blanket she’d found in the back of Sweet Pea’s truck.

 

“He’s not though, he’s a dumbass,” Sweet Pea mutters, and Toni bites back a snort of amusement.

 

Jughead glares at them. “What happened to ’no Serpent stands alone’, guys?” he asks, and all three of them let out a groan.

 

“That rule doesn’t apply when you’re breaking into one of the most powerful men in Riverdale’s house with no fucking reason, Jones,” Fangs says, shaking his head. “You haven’t even told us what you think you might find.”

 

“ _Blackmail material_ ,” Jughead says, and Toni wants to reach out her leg and kick him, or at the very least knock the grubby beanie off from his head. “Look, I won’t force you guys, but at the end of the day it could save our homes! It’s a risk, but I can get my dad to agree to pay you guys for it, and-”

 

“What?” That definitely caught Toni’s attention.

 

It’s Friday night, meaning she has exactly two days to get together enough money to cover the rent. Despite the longer shifts she’s taken at the Wyrm this week, she’s still short, by a lot, and out of ideas. One out of many drunkards at the Wyrm had overheard her relentlessly begging Byrdie for a couple of weekend shifts and offered her twenty bucks for ‘twenty minutes in the back room’ and Toni wasn’t quite sure whether it was intended as a sexual innuendo, but either way she’d had to physically restrain herself from decking the guy.

 

Jughead looks up, a little confused. “What to which part?” he asks, and Toni growls in annoyance.

 

“The paying us, part,” she says, and she feels Fangs and Sweet Pea’s eyes on her all of a sudden, but she ignores it.

 

Jughead nods and shrugs. “Yeah, of course. I’m not asking you to do this out of blind loyalty,” he says, and Toni wonders why he didn’t lead with that. They probably could’ve saved at least twenty minutes of sitting out in the cold.

 

“I’m in,” she says, without a moment’s hesitation. Jughead’s looking at her curiously, and she knows he’s wondering why she needs the money so desperately, but she doesn’t feel like telling him. She’s not nearly as close with him as she is with Sweet Pea and Fangs, their only real connection (aside from Jughead being the half-assed king of the Serpents) is the frequency of Toni’s visits to his trailer to see FP. And most of those times Jughead is off with his Northside girlfriend, Betty, anyway.

 

“Tiny-” Fangs begins quietly, and Toni simply shakes her head at him. She’s desperate, so much so that she had seriously contemplated asking one of the older Serpents if she could help them out with moving some jingle jangle. She’d shut down the thought almost straight away, but the idea still lingered in case she couldn’t come up with an alternative.

 

Eyes scanning between her best friends, she can all but see the gears in their heads turning. She doesn’t want them to say yes just because she has, although she knows it’s likely that they might - they’re basically her brothers, it makes sense. But they could also use the money, she knows that. They _all_ could, they live in a trailer park for god's sake.

 

“Me too,” Sweet Pea says after a while, and at that Fangs gives a small firm nod, folding his arms over his chest with a sharp exhale.

 

“Yeah, I- me too,” he mutters, and they all exchange looks, jaws tight in a mutual understanding that this is _desperation_. “When do you plan for us to do it, then?”

 

Jughead sighs, shaking his head. “Soon. I’m not sure how long we’ll have. The landowners are meant to give us six weeks notice, but everyone knows Hiram and Clifford don’t play by the rules,” Jughead bites down on his lip, shaking his head. “I was counting on tomorrow night?”

 

“So like, _soon_ soon.” Sweet Pea raises his eyebrows, looking up at him. “How d’you know no one will be there?” he asks.

 

“I heard Cheryl talking to Veronica. She said something about some important dinner at a fancy restaurant in Greendale tomorrow,” Jughead says.

 

At the mention of Cheryl’s name, Toni suddenly finds herself thinking of the red haired girl. She doesn’t imagine Cheryl would be best pleased to hear that Toni had broken into her house, if they got caught, and… Toni hope she doesn’t find out, because, well, maybe she’s growing on her or something. Toni isn’t sure, but she feels a pang of some _unidentified_ feeling, at hearing Cheryl’s name; it’s unfamiliar, not exactly unwelcome, but she can’t figure out what it is _._ Cheryl is... possibly her _friend_ , or maybe just an acquaintance that Toni happens to think is pretty cute.

 

She can’t admit to it being any more  

 

Toni breathes out harshly, shaking her head, still filled with doubt on how reliable this plan is. “How would we get in? You can’t exactly just- smash a window. They’re bound to have _some_ security at least, they’re, like, the richest family in Riverdale.”

 

“I snagged a key from Cheryl’s bag earlier. It looks like a front door key, and if not, we’ll try the other doors until one of them work,” Jughead smirks.

 

Toni’s guilt is back. From what little she knows of Cheryl, as soon as she discovers the absence of that key, she’ll panic. Or even worse, she’ll get in trouble for losing it. She doesn’t know a lot about the Blossoms, but if they’re as bad parents as they are people, then Toni doesn’t imagine Cheryl’s home life is the most pleasant.

 

“And what time are they going out, Sherlock? How long will they be?” Sweet Pea’s voice is dripping with sarcasm, but Jughead clears his throat and gives a little smile.

 

“We’ll have a mini stake out. We can park our bikes behind the estate and watch from across the road - I scouted the area, and we could definitely all hide there unseen. It’s almost certainly a business meal of kinds, so they won’t be any less than two hours. And as long as we keep an eye on Veronica’s snapchat, which we know is active twenty-four seven, then we should have a pretty good timeline of their evening.”

 

Jughead looks incredibly pleased with himself, and while Toni is mildly impressed, she wishes he would wipe the smugly satisfied look off of his face, because it’s making her regret her choice more and more by the moment. He’s going to get them into something _stupid_ , she just knows it… “If this goes wrong, I want full permission to punch you in the face,” Toni says, and even Sweet Pea looks at her, slightly startled.

 

“If our heads don’t get blown off; permission granted,” Jughead says, to which they all respond by staring at him in surprise because, _did he really just say that?_ “It was… It was a joke guys,” he adds hastily, and Toni just exhales sharply, shaking her head as she pushes herself out of the back of Sweet Pea’s truck, standing up.

 

“Is that all, can we go now?” she asks, shifting on her feet and pulling the blanket around her even tighter, exhaling and watching the little cloud of air drift up in the cold.

 

Jughead hums and gives a nod. “Tomorrow night, okay, guys? We’ll meet at my trailer at six to go over the plan.”

 

*

 

Cheryl usually likes Saturdays. Sometimes she’s allowed to hang out with Veronica, and sometimes she just stays home and amuses herself for the day. Penelope and Clifford are usually out for most of it, and almost always not even aware of whether Cheryl is home or not. Not that she would dare to sneak out without permission… No.

 

But this Saturday, she wakes up, barely able to move with the pain in her body. It’s worse than last night, and she’s surprised that it hurts as much as it does, deciding that her brain must’ve blocked out a large amount of what happened, because she barely remembers the evening, right up until she tucked herself into bed.

 

What’s worse, is the looming reminder of the impending business meal she has to attend with her parents, later in the evening. It’s only with Hiram, Hermione and Veronica, and Cheryl wonders why it has to be in such a fancy restaurant, to the extent that her mother insisted she iron one of her best dresses. But despite her familiarity with their company, Cheryl knows that three hours of striving to impress, for fear of the repercussions from her parents, is emotionally draining even when she’s not in pain all over.

 

Looking down at her arms, exposed by her tank top, she cringes at the patches of discolouration littering her alabaster skin, and Cheryl has no idea how she’ll go about wearing a dress with these. Any makeup she has is bound to rub off, or simply not conceal well enough, and so she’ll probably have to spend the evening baking to death in a long sleeved cardigan that, out of necessity, hides her arms and undoubtedly shoulders and upper back too.

 

Cheryl slumps back against her pillows, momentarily forgetting the pain in her back and biting back a whimper. Glancing at the clock, she realises it’s already getting on for ten, and since she hasn’t heard any noises from downstairs or any of the adjacent rooms, her parents could very well be out. She hopes so, because she’s not sure she could bear to spend the rest of the afternoon tiptoeing around them, and avoiding their brooding silences. After an explosion in the magnitude of last night’s, Cheryl will be able to sense her father’s discomfort around her for the next couple of days. Any time he catches a glimpse of discoloured skin that he was the cause of, or a wince when she moves, he averts his gaze with a nonsensical grumble and frown. She’s never sure if he feels guilty, or whether it’s something else, but even if he does - it’s obviously not enough to stop him from hurting her time and time again.

 

Sliding out of bed, Cheryl makes her way over to her wardrobe, managing to keep a brave face through the pain of each movement. She rummages through her drawer and finds a pair of cotton shorts to put on, making her way downstairs, quietly, just in case. The smell of fresh coffee is drifting up the stairs, and Cheryl feels her heart sink when her gaze falls upon her parents sat at the dining table. There’s various sheets of paperwork sprawled across the table, and Cheryl is mildly curious, but she’s too tense with their gazes now fixed on her to look closer.

 

“You’re joining us and the Lodges for dinner tonight I assume, dear?” Penelope says, setting down her coffee mug and peering at Cheryl over the rim of her glasses.

 

Feeling a seldom moment of braveness, Cheryl bites down on her lip and shrugs. “Do I have a choice?” she asks, quietly all the same, but it’s bolder than she usually dares to be. Mostly because she knows they won’t dare to even reprimand her, not after last night.

 

Penelope moves to stand up, and Cheryl flinches slightly in fear, but Clifford’s hand grabs her wrist and he pulls her back into her chair. She looks to him, outrage evident in her eyes for a moment or two, before she seems to recompose herself with a deep breath in.

 

“No. You don’t,” she responds, and Cheryl gives a small nod.

 

“I guess that’s a yes then,” she slides her hands into the pockets of her shorts, rocking slightly on her heels as she does.

 

“Very well, dear,” Penelope says, tone sickeningly sweet. Clifford is still avoiding her gaze, sipping his coffee and staring down at a stack of papers in front of him.

 

She’s in the habit of only coming and going as her parents tell her to, so when Penelope turns her attention back to the papers on the table, and begins mumbling to Clifford again, she’s a little lost, but in the end decides upon going back upstairs. There’s not much she’ll accomplish today, given that she’s hardly allowed to leave the house anyway, and even if she were, each movement elicits a soft wince from her lips.

 

“Cheryl!” her mother’s voice sounds out from downstairs, and Cheryl feels irrationally hopeful for a second or two. She stops at the top of the stairs to await the inevitable following statement.

 

“Iron your dress for this evening. We wouldn’t want you to appear unkempt!”

 

Cheryl’s stomach sinks. She pushes away the disappointment and makes her way into her room, slamming the door closed behind her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you think, your comments make my day!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, well, hello! this chapter is... quite something. lots of drama. next chapter is packed too. not really sure what else to say, so yeah... enjoy!
> 
> trigger warning for guns, mentions of abuse, mentions of murder, and kind of suicidal thoughts

 

“ _Ouch_ , fuck-”

 

“Shh!”

 

“Jesus fucking christ, ow-”

 

“Shh!”

 

“I’m gonna f-”

 

“Shut up!” Toni hisses, for the third and final time, and if they weren’t currently all balancing upon the top of a ten foot high gate, she would reach out and shove Sweet Pea. Sliding her bag off her shoulders, she drops it to the ground below on the other side of the fence, glad she’d taken FP’s advice to pack her stuff with towels to cushion it from any damage.

 

The ex Serpent King hadn’t been best pleased about their plans to _break into_ Thornhill, in fact, when Jughead had first sheepishly explained their intentions, FP's face had turned almost red in anger. After some persuasion, mostly in the form of Jughead’s incessant whining, he came round to it, even dubbing it a job that he’d pay them for. “As compensation for my son’s idiocy if you get shot in the head by Clifford Blossom” had been his exact words; but Toni’s trying her best not to think of that possibility right now. She had asked him to put it directly to the rent for their trailer, because she’s not sure if she would be able to take care of it all in time to avoid a visit from the outraged rent collectors with an eviction notice. He’d given her a strange, concerned look, but she simply pursed her lips and offered a small smile, eyes pleading with him to leave it for now, because, discussing her and her uncle’s financial issues in front of her three friends (even if FP is like a paternal figure to her) is not a situation she wants to find herself in.

 

“Is that a security camera?” Fangs hisses, eyes narrow as he stares at something on the side of the house.

 

“Motion sensor. The light isn't on, though, so it’s not activated,” Jughead mumbles, tossing his own bag to the ground, glancing down at the drop with a nervous tilt of his head. “As with most aspects of the Blossoms’ lives, it’s just for show.”

 

Toni thinks about how untrue that is in regards to Cheryl. But she pushes that thought out of her mind too, because she really doesn’t want to get caught up in thinking about Cheryl right now. It will just lead to the inevitable guilt weighing down on her and, there's  _no way_ she can back out now, but she might end up doing just that if she keeps thinking of a certain redhead. That’s not an option, though; not even because Jughead would crucify her, but because her _home._ If she doesn’t get the money for this job, her and her uncle are out of their trailer, and she won’t let that happen.

 

Glancing across at the boys, she realises that none of them intend on going first. With a harsh roll of her eyes, she grips onto the railings and jumps off, bending her knees in preparation. She lands almost perfectly, and finds herself momentarily grateful for the five years of gymnastics that her mother had made her endure as a child. Taking a few careful steps forward and scuffing her foot against the ground, she looks up and shrugs. “No sensors. What’re you waiting for?” she calls up, quietly, the sight of the three boys clinging to the top of the gate is almost comical.

 

Fangs jumps first, and Toni pats him on the back as he straightens up, as they wait for Jughead and Sweet Pea to join them. If she wasn’t as nervous as she is, she would probably be taunting Sweet Pea for his hesitance, but she’s much too tense and she imagines that the same goes for her best friend.

 

“You’ve got the key, right, Jones?” Fangs asks, watching as Jughead brushes the gravel from his knees, having stumbled upon his landing. He was perhaps the least graceful of them all, and again, in another situation, Toni would currently be laughing at him.

 

Shooting him a glare, Jughead whips the silver key out of his top pocket. “How stupid do you think I am?”

 

“Don’t answer that,” Sweet Pea mumbles, eliciting soft snorts of laughter from his other two friends, as Toni bends to pick up her bag from the ground, adjusting it on her shoulders.

 

It takes Jughead a minute to get the key in the front door, and none of them comment on the fact that his hand is shaking. They’re all scared. They’re used to doing jobs for the Serpents, but they’re usually jobs well within the bounds of the law, and without the risk of having their _heads_ blown off.

 

The door clicks open after a few more moments, and Fangs is the first to step in, clapping his hand down on Jughead’s shoulder to lead him in, given that the boy is all but trembling with nerves. It's a small friendly gesture but it causes a smile to tug at Toni’s lips, despite the knot of anxiety that’s ever-tightening in her stomach. Toni follows shortly after, Sweet Pea double checking the drive before pulling the heavy mahogany door closed behind them.

 

A silence falls over them all as their gazes sweep the hall in front of them. It’s unlike anything any of them have ever seen before.

 

Thornhill is visible from the trailer park, and growing up Toni had always wondered what  _the castle on the hill_ (as the Southside children had dubbed it over time) looked like from the inside. She didn’t imagine that she would ever find out, especially not as a consequence to breaking in to the mansion itself, and yet… It’s not what she expected. She had envisioned a grand house, just as majestically furnished on the inside as you would anticipate as an external onlooker, and that part of her expectation is proven to be true, but… Toni had also expected a home. A home with a warm, cosy, feel of being so surrounded and cushioned by objects and luxury that the house that undoubtedly has at least a hundred years of history behind it, feels like a safe, warm embrace of a house.

 

That turns out to be a major misconception. Because despite being stood in the hall of this grand manor, Toni’s certain that she’s never stepped foot in a place with a more somber, terrifying, haunting energy. It feels like less of a home than Toni’s _postage stamp_ of a trailer, the obviously well-thought out design and decoration failing to lessen the dark misery of the house.

 

Before long, Toni’s mind is drawn to Cheryl.

 

The beautiful, mysterious, poor little Cheryl Blossom who seems to walk the halls of Riverdale High in a perpetual state of absent fear - seemingly all alone, aside from Veronica Lodge, who seldom appears to have a moment for anyone but Archie Andrews, as far as Toni knows. Cheryl is so misperceived and neglected at school, only to have to return to a ‘home’ such as this one… Toni feels incredibly as though she, and all of them, are invading on the girl’s privacy to just be here in this place, absorbing what seems to be a deeper understanding of the ins and outs of Cheryl Blossom’s life.

 

This family’s trouble. She knows that. Any and all involvement with even a single Blossom can lead to your ultimate demise in both literal and metaphorical terms. The rumours surrounding Jason Blossom’s death had flown high for an entire month, even all the way over on the Southside.

 

‘… _What a horrible tragedy. He was so young…_ ’

 

‘… _How dreadful to be the one to find a child’s body at the bottom of a twenty foot drop, neck snapped…’_

 

 _‘…That poor, poor family. To lose a son, so soon..._ '

 

Toni had barely known Jason, only known _of_ him, and yet the sparse but chilling details of his death served to drive Toni away from reading too much into it. There was something all too sinister about knowing there was a death, albeit ruled accidental, of a boy who sat two rows away from her in math, a boy who she simply knew to be the one of the two semi-infamous Blossom twins, a boy who had been nothing more than a name and a face in passing to her. All of it still felt much too sickening for Toni.

 

And yet here’s Cheryl, still living in this nightmare, with constant reminders of her pain and loss surrounding her every day; if the giant painting of Jason in the hall is anything to go by. It pains Toni to know all of this, to take a step into Cheryl’s home and feel as though she’s experiencing even only a fraction of her daily pain…

 

“Where to first?” Sweet Pea’s voice is quiet and gravelly, and breaks them all out of their trains of thought.

 

Fangs sniffs, ruffling his hair as he looks around with a slow shake of his head. “I don’t like this place, guys, not at all,” he mutters, and there’s a mutual hum of agreement, all looking to one another for validation of their discomforts.

 

“Doesn’t it feel… Wrong, to be here? I kind of forgot the fact that as monstrous as Penelope and Clifford are, they lost their son not even three months ago.” Jughead speaks with empathy and simultaneous reason for the first time that Toni can recall, and she gives a slow nod, because he’s right. Nothing about this feels quite right.

 

And yet …

 

“Our homes, guys. Our lives, our families, our trailers, the _Serpents_ ,” Fangs says, voice firm, despite the underlying and still present tremble of discomfort. “As horrible as a situation is, a man like Clifford Blossom has much to hide. It’s just down to us to uncover _one_ thing, and all our lives are saved from this destruction. We keep our homes, as do all the other Serpents, and- Toni, your grandfather, he needs this, remember?”

 

Doing her best to remain calm, Toni clenches her jaw and gives a nod. Of course she remembers. Each of them are here because they’re desperate, this is the _last_ and _only_ option. And if Toni had anything else, she would not be here in Cheryl Blossom’s house, about to ransack the place looking for something that may not even exist. _Anything_ to hold over Clifford Blossom’s head.

 

“Of course I do. I’m not backing out now,” she replies, arms folding over her chest, gaze dropping to the patterned carpet adorning the floor to avoid meeting Jughead’s guilty eyes.

 

“Where first?” Sweet Pea asks, firmly this time, glancing towards the staircase since that seems the obvious answer.

 

“A businessman like Clifford is going to have a home office where he keeps his papers, computer, etcetera. I would say that’s our best bet,” Toni responds, fingers curling into the straps of the bag on her shoulders.

 

There’s a mumble of mutual agreement, and despite still feeling horribly on edge, that allows Toni to relax slightly.

 

If they’re in this, at least they’re in it together.

 

*

 

“It’s wonderful to see you again, Hermione.”

 

Cheryl can see right through the grin plastered on her mother’s face and the warm embrace of Veronica’s mother which she follows her words with. Penelope isn’t a fan of the Lodges, she knows that much. Instead, Cheryl suspects that she fears them a little - rightly so, because Veronica’s father is the most powerful man in Riverdale, and although that may not seem to be a feat in itself, Cheryl knows from various droplets of information over the years, that he has his sights on more than just their little town.

 

Pulling her cardigan tight around her shoulders, Cheryl walks to stand by Veronica’s side, giving her best friend a small smile. This evening is going to be torture enough, and Veronica’s presence may serve to slightly lessen that.

 

“Hey,” Veronica smiles, pulling Cheryl into a hug that has her wincing softly. Veronica doesn’t seem to notice, because she holds on far too tight for a few seconds, before relinquishing her grip. “This evening is going to be entirely too painful,” she mutters, voice too quiet for anyone but Cheryl to hear.

 

“Believe me, I know,” Cheryl replies quietly, moving to cross her arms over her chest, exhaling deeply, her breath sending a white cloud through the evening air.

 

“Are you okay?” Veronica asks, voice soft as she turns to look at Cheryl, brow suddenly furrowed in careful concern.

 

Cheryl bites down on her lip, Veronica’s gentle expression a soothing relief, and yet she doesn’t intend on confessing any of the truth to her. Not now, not here, and… probably not ever. For fear of not being able to shut up once she’s begun. So instead she nods, giving a small smile. “I’m-”

 

Before she can continue, Penelope walks up beside her, hand gripping onto her forearm. “Come along now, Cheryl, our reservation is waiting,” she says, and Cheryl winces harshly at the touch alone, pulling her arm away upon instinct.

 

Penelope’s eyes narrow as she stares at Cheryl, and the younger Blossom cowers involuntarily under her stare. She hadn’t meant to pull away, not really, but her whole body is aching already, and every touch right now - especially from her parents - feels like a horrible burning. “Sorry,” she breathes quietly, fear cramping in her chest.

 

Veronica is looking at her, frowning a little more as she observes the interaction, but as soon as Penelope’s gaze lands on Veronica watching them closely, the woman’s lips are stretching into a broad smile. Cheryl’s stomach feels uneasy at the thought of the consequences of what she just did - showing her mother up in front of Veronica. Not to mention, no one defies Penelope Blossom without consequence, not even the smallest of actions, and Cheryl doesn’t like the thought of what reprimand she may face, later.

 

“Come on, dear,” Penelope says, voice a sickeningly false, sweet tone that Cheryl despises as her hand slides further up Cheryl’s arm, fingers digging into her forearm, undoubtedly bruising the already sensitive flesh.

 

Cheryl looks to Veronica, and immediately regrets it, because her best friend is staring at her with a mixture of confusion, concern and something Cheryl can’t quite identify. The last thing she needs is Veronica digging around for information about her home life; all that takes place within Thornhill is something Cheryl would rather keep to herself, shoulder the burden alone because god… the minute she entrusts someone, confides in them the _truth_ about her parents and how cruel they are… she’s not sure that she’ll be able to pretend anymore.

 

She’s barely kept it together since Jason’s death, barely managed to greet even her best friend with a smile, barely managed to wake up in the morning with anything more than a soft sigh of realisation that she’s _still here._ Opening up now, revealing the truth to someone, anyone… Cheryl’s sure that would break her.

 

“Behave yourself, for lord’s sake,” Penelope hisses as soon as they’re out of earshot of Veronica, voice low and laced with venom. Her smile is still in place, and so to Hiram and Hermione who are being led into the restaurant by her father, all seems perfectly normal and relatively inconspicuous.

 

“S-sorry, Mommy,” Cheryl makes her voice even quieter, shrinking away at Penelope’s aggravated sigh, but ensuring not to pull away from the hold on her arm.

 

Penelope all but wrenches the door to the restaurant open, pushing Cheryl through with a tight squeeze of her arm, before releasing her. “Just be _good_ , Cheryl,” Penelope says, voice less harsh than before, and Cheryl bites back a whimper as she gives a nod.

 

She’s trying - she _always_ is. All she’s ever wanted to do is to please her parents. To make them love her. She just wants to be enough for them, for _anyone…_

 

Maybe one day she’ll be enough for someone. Maybe someone can show her the love she’s never received from the two people who are meant to love her the most in the world.

 

She chastises herself when her train of thought drifts wistfully to Toni Topaz. No, that’s not even a possibility. Toni is far too… Toni is _entirely_ out of her league, and Cheryl feels guilty for even entertaining the idea.

 

Even so, that doesn’t stop the soft embarrassed burn of her cheeks as she bows her head, gritting her teeth and stepping into the restaurant, preparing for an evening of torture.

 

*

 

Toni feels the heavy guilt in her chest returning as she stands in the doorway of Cheryl’s bedroom. After appointing himself ‘leader of the mission’ given the fact that he’s Serpent King (a fact which he’d stated, in case they’d forgotten) Jughead had sent Toni to scout the rest of the house, while Fangs checked Clifford and Penelope’s bedroom, and he and Sweet Pea investigated the home office. They’ve been here for bordering on an hour, and yet none of them have found _anything_ incriminating, and Toni’s beginning to grow uncertain that they will. Sure, just by being here, FP’s probably transferring the money for her rent right now - but what’s the use of that if they’ll all be bulldozed out of the trailer park in six weeks anyway?

 

She doubts there’s anything of use to their mission to be found in Cheryl’s bedroom, and yet she feels an alluring pull towards it - just to… _look_. It’s decorated with a sophisticated, red theme, and there’s a stuffed bear sat in the middle of the pillows at the top of her bed. The sight of it makes Toni smile, despite how hard she digs her teeth into her lower lip to try and stop it.

 

She wants to look around, have a little more insight into Cheryl’s life, given that almost all she knows about her is from empty rumours and the few, nervously mumbled words she’s received from the girl herself. But this isn’t how she wants to get to know Cheryl. And while she’s not quite able to pinpoint why yet; she _does_ want to get to know her, but she wants it to be on Cheryl’s terms, and not by snooping around where she doesn’t belong.

 

“You’re not going to find anything by standing in the doorway,” Jughead’s voice startles her out of her thoughts, and Toni almost jumps a foot in the air, arms tightening across her chest.

 

She turns to face him, tucking away the soft smile that had been on her lips, and giving a small shake of her head. “There’s nothing to be found, in there, I was just… curious,” Toni murmurs, swallowing harshly, because she can feel her cheeks warming slightly and, _goddamn it_ , she needs to get better at disguising her conflicting feelings.

 

“I see. So you’re not going to check?” Jughead asks, lips twitching upwards, as he gives a small tilt of his head. There’s a hint of knowing in his eyes as he does so, and Toni’s not quite sure exactly what he thinks he’s onto, because even she doesn’t know why she’s stood in the threshold of Cheryl’s bedroom, staring like an idiot at the little pink bear on her pillows.

 

Toni frowns, shrugging her shoulders and stepping away from the door, pulling it closed behind her. For some reason, she doesn’t like the idea of Jughead wanting to see inside Cheryl’s room either. “Not found anything?” she asks.

 

Jughead doesn’t seem to mind her change of subject, and he sighs heavily, shaking his head. “Sweet Pea’s trying to get the filing cabinet open with a couple of paper clips, but, he’s not very talented with the art of lock picking. If we had Betty here, however-” he begins, and Toni is rolling her eyes harshly, reaching up to tug the bobby pin out of her hair before Jughead can launch into a speech about his girlfriend, who Toni happens to find a little more than mildly irritating.

 

“Bobby pins work better than paper clips. I assumed Nancy Drew would’ve taught you that,” she grumbles, brushing past Jughead before he has time to look offended.

 

Stepping into the office, her eyes widen at the mess they’ve made out of it all. They had better hope they find something, or Clifford will no doubt be going to Sheriff Keller with reports of a break-in, whether they take anything or not. Inhaling through her nose, she walks over to the cabinet that Sweet Pea is jostling violently, brow crumpled in agitation.

 

“Here, budge out the way,” she says, bending the bobby pin to shape as he shuffles back, giving a small frown of curiosity.

 

“It’s not going to work, Tiny,” he says, rolling his eyes as she jams the pin into the lock. “I’ve been trying for ten minutes, it must be some weird special lock-” he’s cut off when it makes a soft click, and Toni pulls the drawer open.

 

She laughs at the surprised look on his face, tucking the pin back into her hair for the time being. “You’re welcome,” she says simply, eyes scanning over the rows of files in the drawer. It’s the only one that’s actually locked, which seems at least a little suspicious, and Toni feels a spark of hope that maybe they’ll find something, even if they still have no idea whatsoever what it is they’re looking for.

 

“We should split the files up, guys,” Jughead says, as he walks back into the office, followed shortly by Fangs. “Veronica just posted on snapchat and by the looks of the food, we’ll probably only have a little over an hour or so left, and these files are looking like our best shot. If we don’t find anything we’re gonna need to tidy the place up and get out.”

 

Toni nods, lifting a stack of the files out from the drawer, arms trembling slightly under the weight of them as she holds them out to Sweet Pea. Sliding two piles across to Jughead and Fangs, she begins to leaf through the remaining few, finding it infuriating how they don’t seem to be in any particular order.

 

“These are just like… Business stuff, I think,” Fangs frowns, leafing through what appears to be a particularly thick stack of binded papers. “Contracts and stuff. It doesn’t make a lot of sense, but it talks a lot about maple syrup so, it can’t be too shady.”

 

“Just keep looking, okay? It must have been locked for a reason,” Jughead responds, and Toni wants to trust that he’s right, but she’s doubtful as she picks up another file with ‘BIG SALE’ written on the front in scrawly handwriting.

 

They all work in mostly silence for a while, the only sound being the shuffling of paper, and occasional heavy sigh. Sweet Pea’s quieter than usual, and Toni knows that even he is aware of how important this is. She’s starting to think they should probably come up with a back up plan, though, and fast. Just as she goes to drop one of her last files down on the desk, an exasperated grumble at the tip of her tongue, the corner of a red file at the back of the cabinet drawer catches her attention. It’s obviously been hidden behind the others, so far back in the drawer that you probably wouldn't think to look unless you were _trying_ to find it.

 

She pulls it out, brow furrowed curiously as she slides a few sheets of paper out of the case. The first couple of papers seems to be lists of bank transfer of sorts, and as soon as her eyes land on the total price in the bottom corner, she blinks in surprise. Thirty thousand dollars. It seems to be going from Clifford Blossom to a… John Curdle? The name looks vaguely familiar, and Toni feels as though she may have read it somewhere before, but she can’t place it.

 

Putting the sheets to the back of the pile, her eyes scan over the next paper in front of her. It takes her a moment or two to realise what she’s looking at. But when she does, she immediately freezes. Her chest tightens and she can feel her heart rate picking up because what the _hell-_

 

It’s an **autopsy**.

 

But not just any autopsy, it’s...  Jason Blossom’s autopsy. Conducted by a Dr. J. Curdle.

 

And while that in itself might not seem all too surprising, in the top corner, beside ‘manner of death’ is the one word that has Toni’s breath caught in her throat.

 

 _Manner of death:_ **_Homicide_ **

_Cause of death: Strangulation and asphyxiation._

 

“What are we even looking for, anymore, Jug? This is a waste of time-” Fangs is saying, as Toni tunes back into their background conversation.

 

Wetting her lips, she lowers the file to look up at her friends, heart racing in her chest. This definitely isn't what she signed up for. What _any_ of them signed up for. They were expecting to find something _small_ on Clifford that they could hold against him, something that proved he was having an affair, or something that could show he was skipping out on taxes… Something _small_. Something that they could use to get him to back out of the sale. Not something like this, this- whatever this is…

 

“Guys,” she speaks, voice quiet and yet at least an octave higher than she anticipated. She thinks she might be trembling a little, because this is so overwhelming. Whatever they’ve got themselves caught up in now is not as trivial and harmless as they had initially thought. She doesn’t seem to catch their attention, because none of them look up from the papers before them. Drawing in a sharp breath, she speaks a little louder. “Guys!”

 

The urgency in her voice must be evident, because all three of their heads snap up at the same time, eyes suddenly fixed on her. At seeing how pale she is, the soft tremble of her hands, Fangs is over at her side in a flash, hand on her arm and a frown on his face.

 

“What is it, Tiny? What’s-” he begins, tone gentle, until Toni holds up the paper in her hand.

 

The other two boys make their way over too, all eyes on the sheet of paper that seems to hold countless answers, but also raise a shitload more questions. What does this even mean?

 

“Homicide? What? No, Jason’s death was an open and shut case. It was ruled accidental… He fell down a twenty-five foot drop in Fox Forest,” Jughead’s eyes are wide, and he snatches the report from Toni’s hands. Her own are shaking too much to hold onto it. “ _Asphyxiation and strangulation_?”

 

“There’s a-a series of bank transfers from Clifford to the coroner. Total of th-thirty thousand dollars,” Toni says, extending it to show them, eyes nervously scanning over the faces of her friends. She’s not sure how to react. Not sure how to feel.

 

She didn’t know Jason. No. But that doesn’t mean his death didn’t impact her, didn’t hit hard when she heard about the seventeen year old kid in her maths class that had snapped his neck in Fox Forest. And now, to find out that… His own father is either responsible for his death, or covering up for someone who is? It seems… Unthinkable. And-

 

Cheryl.

 

Oh god, Cheryl. Her throat almost closes up at the thought of her. She remembers the first few weeks back at school, after summer. She remembers when Cheryl started back, two weeks into the year, and all the stares she had received. She remembers seeing Cheryl walking down the hall, Veronica Lodge’s arm wrapped around her, as she all but trembled in the careful embrace, because of the _painful_ loss of her brother, having to return to school without him, facing _everyone_ judging her and her family… Toni had never exchanged a word with her, then, but she felt her heart aching for the poor girl, even while the rest of the student body entertained rumours that she or her family had been responsible.

 

Toni thought it ridiculous then. And she still thinks it ridiculous now that anyone could’ve thought Cheryl was responsible. But Clifford… If he did this… It’s going to break Cheryl all over again. Toni doesn’t know her very well, not yet, but she knows loss. She knows what it feels like to cry over the body of the person that you love most in the world. She had been there when her father died, and the thought of anyone having to feel all that tears her apart inside.

 

“Clifford paid Doctor Curdle to fake an autopsy?” Fangs speaks eventually, and, all of them look more conflicted and shocked than she’s ever seen them.

 

“To cover up him murdering his son,” Jughead concludes, jaw clenched, eyes hard as he looks down at the paper again, shocked into silence.

 

Toni draws in a sharp breath, swallowing the burning emotion rising in her throat. “B-but why? What reason would he have to, to do that?” she asks, voicing the most prevalent question in the moment. It’s mostly evident to anyone that Clifford Blossom isn’t a good man, Penelope most likely isn’t one of God’s angels either. But to kill someone? To kill your son? What reason in hell can there be for that?

 

“He was getting too close to the truth, of course.”

 

It takes them all at least five seconds to realise it wasn’t one of them that just spoke.

 

Toni feels a horrible, sickening fear spreading through her body as she slowly turns around, to find Clifford Blossom stood in the doorway. Holding a gun. Pointed right at them.

 

Toni tries to control her racing mind, panic pulsing through her, flooding every inch of her body. Flashes of a silver barrel against her forehead, cold metal against her temple all flash through her mind, sending her stomach churning-

 

_No, not now. Don’t think about that **now**._

 

Her throat is dry, and she can feel her heart racing. Faster than before. It’s pounding in her chest, and her palms are sweating, and her eyes are stinging with tears because, _fuck-_ they’re going to die, they’re going to die- Clifford Blossom is going to shoot them all…

 

“What truth?” Jughead asks, his voice surprisingly clear and coherent. He’s still clutching the paper in his hands, and aside from the fact that his knuckles are white with tension, he seems to be the most composed out of them all.

 

Clifford lets out a quiet laugh, adjusting his grip on the gun in hand. “Feeling brave are we, Mr Jones?” he asks, smirking when they all, Jughead included, blink in shock at the use of his name. “That’s right. I know who you are… Silly children, did you really think I don’t have security cameras in my own house?”

 

Toni wants to curse Jughead, because that’s probably the one part of the plan that he account for. She blinks her eyes closed for a moment to try and keep herself calm, ignoring the single tear that slides down her cheek. She wants to speak, but she doesn’t trust her voice not to betray her.

 

“What truth are you talking about?” Jughead repeats, and to Toni’s surprise he takes a step forward, holding the paper in hand a little higher. “What truth was dark and horrible enough that you had to strangle your own son to keep it hidden?”

 

“Jones,” Sweet Pea hisses quietly, clearly scared, his hand finding its way to rest against Toni’s arm, and it provides a small amount of comfort to be reminded that her _brothers_ are here with her. But fuck, if Jughead gets them all shot-

 

Clifford laughs, a loud, almost manic sound that sends a shiver up Toni’s spine. “I am not the town’s richest man simply because I sell maple syrup, son,” he says, and all of their brows furrow in confusion - except Jughead.

 

There’s a slight pause. “Drugs?” he asks, and Clifford’s lips curl upwards.

 

“You catch on fast,” he responds, holding the gun a little higher as his gaze scans over them all. His eyes linger on Toni a moment too long, and it makes her stomach churn a little.

 

“You’re not going to kill us. Because I’ll tell you one thing, my father knows we’re here and he knows exactly why we’re here. And if you kill us all now, he’ll know it was _you._ Everyone will. You wouldn’t get away with it,” Jughead speaks, clearly, directing a glare towards Clifford. “You wouldn’t get away with it, like you thought you did with Jason.”

 

Clifford raises an eyebrow, nodding his head slowly. His gaze scans over them all, lips pursed in a tight line. “Why _are_ you here, exactly?” he asks, and for the first time, Toni sees Jughead hesitate.  

 

“You’re- you and Hiram Lodge are buying the trailer park,” he says, voice quiet and steely. “What’s your plan, to turn it into a drug lab?”

 

Clifford sighs heavily, tutting as he shakes his head. “That's it? All this for that worthless piece of land? You foolish children,” he says, lips still curved up into a sickening smile.

 

“You’re not going to kill us,” Jughead repeats, although he sounds less certain this time.

 

There’s a long silence, and Toni is starting to realise that maybe Clifford isn’t all too sure what he plans to do either. He looks deep in thought, and his eyes are flitting between them all, as if he’s trying to see an invisible solution. Eventually, he releases a deep sigh and shakes his head, lowering the gun. “You’re right. I’m not. Give me the autopsy and you’re free to go.”

 

“ _W-what_ ?” Toni speaks this time, voice high in shock. He can’t possibly think that they won’t tell someone? He can’t possibly think that they’ll just _let it slide_ that he murdered a kid?

 

“You heard me, kid,” he nods, holding out his hand for the incriminating sheet of paper.

 

Jughead glances at them all, and they all give firm nods because, of course they’ll take their lives over this goddamn file. Taking a few hasty steps forward, he hands over the paper, eyeing the gun in Clifford’s hand.

 

“Why are you letting us go?” he asks, narrowing his eyes. “What… What are you going to do?”

 

“Stop asking questions. Or would you rather I change my mind and shoot you all now?” Clifford suggests, voice dripping with sarcasm that sends a wave of nausea through Toni. She grips Sweet Pea’s wrist in her hand, taking a step towards the door because, she’s not sure why in _hell_ Clifford is letting them go, but they can figure it out once they’re safe, and away from here.

 

“Come on, guys, let’s get the hell out of here,” Jughead says, as Clifford steps out of their way, face not exhibiting any particular expression, simply still in an eerie calmness. He doesn’t make a move to stop them.

 

As soon as they’re out of the office and down the stairs, they’re legging it. Toni doesn’t usually like to run, but she sprints. Faster than she’s run since eighth grade PE class. It takes them a fraction of the time to scale the gate and jump off on the other side, compared to what it did when they arrived. Even then, they don’t stop running until they’re safely on their bikes, speeding off in the opposite direction of Thornhill.

 

Toni’s heart is still pounding in her chest, and not just from the running. She can’t help the sick fear that sits in her stomach like a brick, making her grip onto the handles of her bike until her knuckles are white from the effort. Her head is throbbing, and a million questions are circling in her mind. But there’s one thing, one person, most prevalent in her thoughts.

 

 _Cheryl_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sort of a cliffhanger. don't hate me! let me know what you think xo


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiii guys! next week's chapter may not come, or it may be a few days late given that i have some pretty intense exams coming up; so just a fair warning. 
> 
> phew this one's heavy, uhh... trigger warnings for suicide, suicidal ideation and mentions of child abuse. your mental health comes first every time, so if these are things that may or will trigger you - please don't read this chapter. i'll be more than happy to respond with a brief summary of the chapter in the comments if you so wish. 
> 
> without further ado, enjoy :)

 

“Fuck,” Toni’s eyes are wide as she looks to all her friends. This hadn’t been _remotely_ how she envisioned her evening panning out, and she’s filled with a cold dread, her heart racing with adrenaline and veins burning with the fear that’s coursing through her body. She leans against the handles of her bike, head feeling dizzy.

 

Jughead is staring down at his phone with the same shock, lips pursed in a tight line whereas just a few seconds ago they’d been delivering the first - or second - most terrifying piece of news yet this evening. The white glow from his screen exaggerates the drained, pale colour of his cheeks, but he in fact looks as though he may vomit, or pass out, or _both_.

 

“Oh fuck, _fuck_ …” Fangs’ eyes are wide as he stares straight at Toni, the flickering lights of Pop’s diner illuminating his face with an eerie red glow. His hands are gripping the handlebars of his bike, knuckles white, and Toni feels the same daunted confusion that her best friend is undoubtedly experiencing too.

 

“How do you- how do you know?” Sweet Pea asks, and looking to him, Toni realises he’s just as terrified as Fangs.

 

Jughead blinks a few times, lifting his phone to display a message from Betty. Of course Nancy Drew would know first; Toni almost rolls her eyes. “Okay, guys, maybe this isn’t as bad as it seems…” Jughead begins, and they all look to him in shock. How the boy that is usually the wimpiest of them all manages to be the calmest in disaster, is beyond them.

 

“A guy is dead, Jones! And we’re… We’re the last ones to have seen him!” Fangs protests, eyes wide as he looks to Jughead in outrage.

 

_Clifford Blossom is dead._

 

Toni tries to focus on the facts, rather than letting her panic get away from her. Because maybe Jughead’s right. What had they been planning to do? What was their next step going to be? None of them had had a clue, so possibly, _maybe_ , this wasn’t the worst thing that could’ve happened. Except for the fact that…

 

_Clifford Blossom is_ **_dead_ ** _._

 

“He confessed,” Jughead states simply, looking towards them. “In his suicide note, he confessed everything that we know. Meaning there’s no need for us to go the police, no need for us to get involved, because they know everything that we do. It’s an open and shut case.”

 

There’s a silence while they all absorb the truth behind Jughead’s words. Maybe he’s right, but does that erase the happenings of tonight? Does that give them the pass to clear their guilty conscience; move on like nothing ever happened? Toni isn’t sure.

 

“If we hadn’t broken in, he’d still be alive. Probably,” Toni says, gritting her teeth as she runs a shaky hand through her hair. Another silence follows, because they all know she’s right. Like it or not, they’re all inadvertently responsible for Clifford Blossom’s death.

 

Jughead releases a sigh, nodding his head and slamming his hand down against the handlebars of his bike. They all look to him, in the unanimous understanding that he’s the one with the answers right now. “Yeah. Maybe, Toni, but if we hadn’t… done whatever it is that we did, then his wife and daughter would still be living under a roof with a killer. He’s a… a murderer.”

 

It only takes Toni’s mind a second to register what he just said.

 

_His wife and daughter._ _His wife and…_

 

Cheryl.

 

She’s not sure what she’s doing, but Toni is jumping back onto her bike before the rational part of her brain has time to interject. Reaching into the pocket of her Serpent jacket, she’s fumbling for her keys, shoving them into the ignition as the boys watch on in shock.

 

“Tiny, where the fuck-”

 

Toni doesn’t give Sweet Pea the chance to finish his question, because the engine is roaring to life, and she’s balancing on the balls of her feet, ready to go. “I’ll- I’ll call you later,” she shouts, over the noise, and within a few seconds, her bike is speeding out of Pop’s parking lot, a cloud of exhaust in its wake, leaving the three other Serpents watching her go, in confusion.

 

Toni knows where she’s planning to go, _exactly_ where, but as she’s riding her bike past Sweetwater River, and towards the house notorious for it’s chilling presence… Her headlights cast a flash of light over a dreadfully familiar car, haphazardly parked by the road side.

 

A candy red Chevrolet Impala. A car that’s almost the same flaming red colour as the hair of the only person Toni can think of right now. Six months ago, that car had been parked outside of school everyday, and while Toni may have only allowed herself the occasional glance in their direction at the time, she remembers the Blossom twins stepping out of that car every morning, Jason’s arm always protectively around Cheryl’s shoulders, challenging anyone to do much as look at her wrong.

 

It’s unmistakably Cheryl’s brother’s car, and brings Toni to a grinding halt, a little off the roadside.

 

There’s only one reason she can think of, why Cheryl would be here, at the cliffside that overlooks Sweetwater River, at this time of night, after inevitably finding out the news that she has. That reason has Toni’s heart pounding as she launches herself off her bike, fighting through the trees, towards the clearing where she _hopes against hope_ that she’ll find Cheryl.

 

*

 

Cheryl’s shoulders are shaking, breathing ragged and violent as she stands atop the cliff towering over Sweetwater River. She’s not sure how she got here, everything since leaving the restaurant has been a blur of police cars, screaming, _crying_ , confusion… Her heart is pummelling against her ribcage as if it’s a drum, and Cheryl is certain that the spreading feel of dark numbness hasn’t been this present and intense since _Jason._ Since the last time she saw his body…  

 

She was stood right there, the last time she saw him alive, and she can see the spot amongst the trees aside the riverbank below, the spot where she stood as he wrapped his arms around her and planted a brief kiss to her forehead. It hadn’t _been_ a goodbye, not really, they both anticipated seeing each other in a few hours - meeting at their promised checkpoint, to return back to Thornhill. Neither of them expected that to be the last time they’d ever see each other.

 

_All because of Clifford._

 

Cheryl can’t breathe from how angry she is, it’s weighing her down, making her mind spin, making her body ache, but she’s also so, so… broken. She’s destroyed. The only person who’s ever shown her any semblance of love, the only person _she’s_ ever loved is… Dead. Gone forever. Because of her father.

 

It wasn’t an accident, it wasn’t a tragic and unfortunate, yet sadly inevitable story. No. It was a _murder._ A father who murdered his son, went about playing the part of a grieving father, until he was caught a little over two months later, wrote a confession note and… Hung himself.

 

Cheryl’s eyes are still burning with the image of her father’s lifeless body hanging from the banister in the barn. She can still _see_ it clear as day, still feel the dread, and fear spreading through her veins at the distraught _cry_ that left Penelope’s throat. Because he was a murderer, a horrible man who is responsible for ruining the _one good thing_ in Cheryl’s life, but, god… Some of her tears are still falling for him, her _father_ , because he’s dead, and this is all just- just so horrible.

 

That’s why she’s stood here. That’s why she’s half hoping that her trembling legs will buckle and give out, sending her tumbling off the edge of the cliff to her demise, so that she doesn’t have to make the jump. Because she’s not sure if she can, not sure if her legs will allow her to make the leap off the edge… Take the cowards way out like her father.

 

But it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter what people will think anymore. They already thought horrible things, and if she stayed, it would be even worse, now that the _truth_ is out there. A confession in black and white, on the paper signed with Clifford’s name. He said he ‘couldn’t live with the guilt any longer’, and… Cheryl understands. She feels the guilt too. The guilt that she’s alive, and Jason’s dead. The guilt that she was never _good_ enough to be the one he chose for the business, never good enough to have a chance to save Jason. The guilt that… _her_ father had killed _Jason._

 

A whimper escapes her lips amongst her silent sobs, and she bites it back despite the fact that there’s no one around to hear it. Nightfall covers the river like a dark cloak, the water surface shimmering ever so slightly beneath the moon’s gentle light. It’s beautiful, really, and Cheryl decides that… If she’s going to die anywhere, here would be a nice place. Here where she last saw Jason.

 

She’s not sure how much time passes, before she’s taking another trembling step towards the edge. Her feet are no more than an inch away from launching her down towards the rocky shore of the lake, where she’ll inevitably… well, die, she assumes.

 

Just one more step… One more step and the pain is over. One more step and the hatred, and anguish that’s currently flooding her entire body, the only emotion pulsing through her veins… It will finally end. She’ll be reunited with Jason.

 

Finally. Jason-

 

The roar of a motorcycle engine breaks her out of her thoughts, and she prays it will pass soon. But then it’s gets louder, closer, the sound almost deafening with the proximity, but Cheryl doesn’t budge. Maybe if it gets loud enough it will startle her into stumbling off the cliff, because, god, call her a coward but she’s not sure if she can take those final steps…

 

The engine kills, and there’s a short silence, before a desperate voice is calling out, the only sound in what is now the dead silence of the night.

 

“Cheryl!”

 

The voice is achingly familiar, and while Cheryl at any other time Cheryl would probably give _anything_ to hear it calling her name… She can’t, she’s falling apart right now, she’s _breaking_ , why is Toni Topaz of all people here? The one person who she _least_ wants to see her as the crumbling mess that she is.

 

“Cheryl, please, just… Take a step back.”

 

Cheryl doesn’t move, she draws in a sharp breath that makes her lungs ache, heavy like they’re filled with a thick tar, and she’s fighting to keep her rising sob quiet, but she can’t, it’s erupting from her in a long painful sound and, fuck- she just wishes Toni would leave. She wishes Toni didn’t have to see her like this. Why is she even here? Why, why, why…  Why does she care?

 

“Just, listen to my voice, okay? I know it must feel impossible right now, and I won’t even begin to try and understand the pain you’re feeling, but, Cheryl… you’re not alone in this, okay? You don’t have to do this, this isn’t the only way. You _don’t_ have to jump,” Toni’s voice is firm, and yet calming, and despite the soft tremble to her words, Cheryl finds a shred of comfort in them.

 

She’s not even sure why she’s here. Is she here because she’s desperate? Because she’s willing to do _anything_ to make the pain stop, to make herself feel better again, like she hasn’t done since before Jason died? She doesn’t care what it takes, she just wants the throbbing loneliness, sadness, _anger_ , to stop.

 

“M-my father… My father k-killed J-Jason,” Cheryl chokes out, voice quiet and uneven. She knows Toni probably knows that, is probably aware of that and that’s why she’s here, but… It still seems partially unreal. It still doesn’t seem _plausible_ that Clifford had stood with his hands around Jason’s neck and choked the life out of him. The thought makes her body tremble, makes her feel like she’s being torn up from the inside, out.

 

Toni sighs quietly, and the small sound alone is filled with more empathy and understanding that Cheryl has expected. “I know. I know, Cheryl, and I- fuck, I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine how much pain you must be in, and how desperate you must be to just put an end to it all, but… I’ve been there, okay? I’ve been in the place where you are, at the lowest point of rock bottom where ending it all seems like the only way out. I’m not trying to pretend like I understand exactly how you’re feeling, because, I don’t - it’s different and I know that. But I’m still here, okay? And at the risk of sounding all too cliché, I’ll tell you; things got better. The pain I was feeling didn’t immediately stop, but I found the _hope_ that I needed to fight. And I got through. You can do the same, Cheryl. You can get through this, okay?”

 

_Toni had been here? Here as in… Toni had tried to kill herself?_ As hypocritical as it may seem, Cheryl feels a stab of pain at the notion that Toni had ever felt as much _crushing_ pain as she is now, so much so that she felt like she had to go to extremes to end it.

 

“How? H-h… How did y-you get through it?” Cheryl wishes she could speak a little more coherently, but her voice is a meek tremble, revealing all the uncertainty and pain that she’s feeling right now.

 

“I’m gonna touch your arm, okay?” she hears Toni’s voice, and the girl is suddenly a lot closer, breath warm against the shell of her ear.

 

Cheryl gives a numb nod, feeling a careful hand slide up her bare arm, goosebumps prickling at her skin and a shiver running down her spine. Toni’s hand is warm, and Cheryl is suddenly aware of how goddamn _cold_ it is, and how much she wants to lean into Toni’s embrace to be warm.

 

“My friends reminded me all that I have to live for. All the hope and aspirations that I have, and how badly I don’t want to waste _this_ , this _life_ ,” Toni says, hand rubbing a soft circle against Cheryl’s ivory skin. It’s too dark for her to notice the bruises, and Cheryl’s grateful. There’s a small silence, and then Toni’s other hand falls to settle against her waist, and Cheryl draws in a sharp breath, the gentle affection something that she hasn’t received in so _long._ “The same goes for you, Cheryl. You’re not alone, okay? I’m here.”

 

Cheryl shakes her head, ignoring the throbbing headache as she does so. “For n-now. B-but you’ll l-leave, Toni. Everyone does… You should just g-go. You sh-should leave now, instead.” Cheryl purses her lips tightly, trying to control the tremble of her jaw. Toni is only here because she’s scared that Cheryl’s going to kill herself, that’s the only reason she’s holding onto her right now, the only reason she’s soothing her, and honestly Cheryl can’t make any promises otherwise-

 

“Do you want me to go? Do you want me to leave you, Cheryl?” Toni’s voice is gentle, just as gentle as her hands that slowly tug against Cheryl’s body, coercing her into taking a small, stumbling step backwards until her back is pressed against Toni’s front. There’s a small distance between her and the edge now, and Cheryl feels an inch of relief that she tries to ignore.

 

Cheryl can’t bite back a whimper. She shakes her head. There’s no use denying it, she doesn’t want to be alone, she doesn’t want her to leave. She doesn’t want to feel the absence of Toni’s soft hands against her body because, god, she’s not sure what she’ll do if Toni leaves. Well, she’s almost certain she’ll be joining the current of the river, at the foot of the cliff, crashing against the rocks.

 

“Good. Because I’m not going anywhere, okay? I’m _here_ for you. You’re gonna be okay, Cheryl,” Toni murmurs, and Cheryl can feel the warmth of her breath against her ear again. “You’re gonna be okay.”

 

Suddenly, she can’t hold it in anymore. The pain that’s sitting in her chest like a heavy ball of emotion; anger, pain, anxiety, confusion… It all explodes from her in a loud sob, her body breaking out into trembles as her tears begin to fall.

 

Toni makes a soft noise of empathy, the arm around Cheryl’s waist pulling her closer, and Cheryl turns in the embrace until she’s facing Toni. They’re still precariously close to the edge, and Toni shuffles backwards slowly, arms securely around Cheryl’s waist, maintaining eye contact, each step carefully taken. They come to a stop a couple of feet away, and Toni lifts her hand to brush away the tears clinging to Cheryl’s eyelashes, lip caught between her teeth.

 

“It’s gonna be okay,” Toni says quietly, and Cheryl can’t help the tears that spill from her eyes as she blinks them closed, trying to fight back the stifling emotion, because she doesn’t want to feel this _here_ , doesn’t want to experience this vulnerable pain, out here in the open, when she’s terrified that she may still turn around and fall to her ultimate demise.

 

Toni’s staring at her so, so caringly, and Cheryl doesn’t understand _why_ she cares, _why_ she’s here…

 

“I’m so _sorry_ , Cheryl,” Toni says softly, hand sliding down to cup her face, thumb stroking her jawline. There’s a small pause, and Cheryl tries to figure out what Toni’s thinking, her concerned eyes roaming over Cheryl’s face and making her feel a little self conscious. “What I’m about to say… Fuck, this is going to sound horrible, but I just need you to know this, okay? I understand if you decide you hate me or whatever, but… You deserve to know the _whole_ truth.”

 

Cheryl frowns in confusion, her own hand moving up to dab at her tears harshly, nodding her head, indicating Toni should continue. Usually, a statement as such may panic her, but Cheryl figures that the situation at hand can’t get any worse, not really.

 

“Okay, I’ll just… My friends and I were in your house earlier this evening. We sort of- we broke in to find anything incriminating to use against your father to get him to back out of the sale on the trailer park,” Toni sucks in a sharp breath, and Cheryl tilts her head in simple confusion, sniffing softly as she leans her head into the palm of Toni’s hand that’s rested against her face. “I know it’s not an excuse, and I’m not trying to justify it, but, fuck, Cheryl, we really needed to save our homes, you know? We- _I_ found the file with your brother’s real autopsy, and just as we were reading it, your father came home. He let us go, but I guess _this_ must’ve been his plan from the moment he found us. He knew he couldn’t kill us, so the only other option was jail or-” Toni cuts herself off, and her eyes are wide and guilty as she stares slightly upwards at Cheryl. Cheryl isn’t certain, but she thinks that Toni’s eyes have glassed over with tears, glinting slightly under the dim moonlight. “Ending his life.”

 

Biting down on her lip, Cheryl nods slowly, careful not to move too much, so that Toni won’t remove her hand. She _is_ understandably a little confused but evidently not as angry as Toni is anticipating. Yes, okay she broke into Cheryl’s house, which any other day may come as a shocking piece of information, but after everything that’s happened tonight, the most important thing that Cheryl got from all that is that essentially, Toni spared her from having to live under a roof with a killer any longer. Her _brother’s_ killer.

 

Cheryl’s torn up, of course she is, her _father_ is dead, but… A small part of her, is unable to help the relief that she feels. The relief to be free of the abuse, the fear, the hidden bruises; all things that Clifford brought to her life. Not to mention, he _murdered her brother._ Cheryl’s not sure whether that sentence will ever stop hurting so badly. “T-Toni, it’s not your fault that he… he killed himself,” Cheryl swallows the lump in her throat, gaze falling to settle just aside of Toni’s eye. It still doesn’t feel quite real, the words don’t register to be entirely true just yet. “I’m a little confused, but I-I don’t want you to leave.”

 

Cheryl is aware of how vulnerable she sounds, her voice cracking as she lowers her gaze again shyly. She really doesn’t care right now; she doesn’t care what Toni did, nor does she think that the Serpent should feel guilty for it. She was trying to save her home, her family and friends, right? If that’s the case, then Cheryl can put it to the back of her mind and think about it later, because right now… “Please don’t leave.”

 

Toni grips her chin carefully, her warm hand tilting Cheryl’s chin downwards to look straight at her with a firm stare, that is somehow also heavy with empathy. “I’m not leaving. I promise. I’m right here, Cheryl. You’re not alone.”

 

Taking in Toni’s words, jaw trembling slightly, Cheryl sucks in a gasp of air, finally starting to breathe a little easier. Her chest is still cramping painfully, and her mind is still spinning with the most horrendous thoughts, but she’s no longer hysterical. She’s no longer seconds away from launching herself over the cliffside. Right now, in this second, Toni is keeping her grounded.

 

This gorgeous girl who Cheryl had never _spoken_ to before two weeks ago, simply admired her pink hair and Serpent jacket from afar, her warm brown eyes that Cheryl’s never really had the chance to see before… this girl is her saviour tonight, and Cheryl _really_ doesn’t want to let her go, yet. And if the hand on her waist, and fingers dancing against the ivory skin of her cheek are anything to go by - Toni doesn’t plan to let her go anytime soon either.

 

So maybe she can do this. Maybe it will take time, maybe it will still hurt every single morning when she opens her eyes, only to be faced with the harsh reality of another day where she gets to live and her brother doesn’t. But, maybe she can bear the pain. Maybe she can breathe through it and survive. Maybe Toni’s right, and it’s not time for _her_ end yet…

 

Maybe.

 

*

 

Toni is surprised when Cheryl reaches into her pocket and shakily hands her the keys to her car. She doesn’t argue with it, though, because Cheryl’s hands are trembling, her eyes heavy and exhausted, all the signs that are letting Toni know that she’s by no means in any fit state to drive a car right now. And she’s _definitely_ in no form to ride on the back of a motorbike. Toni’s bike will be fine if she leaves it here overnight.

 

Toni takes the keys carefully, tossing them between her hands for a few moments, in deliberation, as she watches Cheryl. She isn’t going to leave her now, no matter _where_ she takes her. But she isn’t entirely sure where they should go. Every place that she can think of has its own host of risks, and she knows that; she can’t think of _anywhere_ , except taking Cheryl back to Thornhill, which is very possibly the last place she needs to be right now.

 

“Cheryl, will your mother be worried about you? Will she be wondering where you are?” Toni asks, ducking her head slightly as she tries to catch Cheryl’s gaze, wanting to get a sense of where her mind is. She seems mostly zoned out, her mind elsewhere and deep in thought. It makes sense, but Toni doesn’t want to allow her to get too caught up in her own head… She knows the dangers of that, at a time like now.

 

Trying not to cringe at the thought, she brushes her finger over the bumpy skin on the inside of her wrist with a soft inhale. Now isn’t the time for her to start thinking about her own past, she reminds herself.

 

Cheryl sniffles at her words, looking up at Toni. In the small amount of light that’s coming from the streetlights now they’re by the road, Toni can see that her deep brown eyes are red-rimmed and tired. “She told me to g-get out,” Cheryl says, shaking her head as she looks to the left of Toni for a moment or two, a nervous habit that Toni has observed in her before. “She’s… she’s not…” Cheryl’s eyes are wide and worried as she looks to Toni.

 

Toni feels her chest aching in empathy, because she looks so _lost_. And scared. If there’s even a chance of her being able to make Cheryl feel a semblance of okay, then she’s going to do everything within her power to do so. “It’s okay. You don’t have to explain right now,” Toni shakes her head a little, placing her hand on Cheryl’s arm in a small act of comfort. The girl is freezing cold to the touch, and Toni gives her hand a soft squeeze, before pulling back to shed her jacket.

 

She feels a little empty without the weight of the leather against her, but wastes no time in draping the jacket over Cheryl’s shoulders, pulling it around her by the lapels. The cold winds are a little chilly against Toni’s bare arms, but she imagines that it’s nothing in comparison to how ice cold Cheryl’s skin feels.

 

Cheryl looks a little surprised for a moment, the notion of having a Southside Serpent’s jacket around her shoulders obviously rendering her still for a moment or two, before she looks to Toni with a small, hesitant smile that doesn’t even come close to reaching her eyes. She wouldn’t expect any more from Cheryl right now.

 

Squeezing the small hand in her own, carefully, Toni takes a few steps away to open the passenger door of the car, noticing how Cheryl’s eyes widen in panic for a split second as she steps back, seeming to calm down as soon as she realises Toni’s intent. Offering her a gentle smile, Toni guides her forward with a small tug of her hand, holding the door open for Cheryl to get in. She struggles with her seatbelt for a little, her hands trembling too violently to get it clicked in, but eventually she does and Toni closes the door gently.

 

She takes a second to breathe deeply once she’s closed the passenger door. She skims her hand over the bonnet of the car as she walks around to the driver’s side, tossing the keys up in her other hand. _How did today turn into this?_ She’s certain that Cheryl didn’t wake up this morning expecting her day to turn out like this - finding out that her father was responsible for her brother’s murder, and then being the one to find him, dead.

 

Toni remembers the pain. She remembers the pain _she_ felt when her own father died. And while it may be a different kind of love lost between Cheryl and her father, a different kind of grieving… Toni remembers the desperation, the empty ache in her chest, the never ending pain that drove her to where she had been… sitting on the side of her bathtub, a razor pinched between her fingers. That had been her lowest low, her _rock bottom_ , and she remembers how hard it had been to crawl back from that. Fangs and Sweet Pea had been her lifeline and… If Sweet Pea hadn’t broken the door down, if Fangs hadn’t tied that rag around her wrist, if they hadn’t taken her, desperately, to see FP, to fix her up, then, fuck, she might’ve-

 

_Don’t do that. Don’t let your mind go there._

 

Toni forces a breath of air into her lungs, blinking away the bleary tears that had momentarily clouded her vision.

 

As she starts the car, the rumble of the engine coming to life seeming to startle Cheryl a little, Toni makes a decision. They’ll go back to her trailer. There is the risk of her uncle stumbling through the door in the early hours of the morning, reeking of alcohol and vomit, and most likely scaring Cheryl senseless but… There’s also a high possibility that he’ll stay passed out on the floor of the Whyte Wyrm until the morning, when he’ll pick himself up and join his mates for a Sunday morning pint of beer; and the cycle will repeat.

 

“Is it okay if we go to my trailer?” Toni asks softly. She’ll have to park Cheryl’s car around the back, and ensure that none of her fellow Serpents see Cheryl because a _Blossom_ on the _Southside_ ? That’s an unlikely occurrence that would undoubtedly draw attention and cause suspicion. Two things that they _don’t_ need right now.

 

Cheryl looks over, gaze meeting Toni’s, before she gives a numb nod. Toni isn’t sure whether the implications of doing so registered with Cheryl or not, but she figures it’s the best she’ll get right now.

 

The sound of the car engine rumbling as the cars trundles on is the only noise aside from the soft trembles of Cheryl’s breathing every time she inhales. Toni’s too nervous to break the silence, not wanting to send Cheryl into another bout of tears when she’s only just calmed down from the last one. It’s not that Cheryl doesn’t have the right to cry right now, because she does, _god_ , of course she does. But Toni wants to focus on getting the girl to her trailer, safe and in one piece, because then she’ll actually be able to do a little more to help than simply stand and mutter words of sympathy.

 

She’s struggling a little to keep her attention both on the road and checking Cheryl every few seconds, and she’s so out of practice in driving _cars_ that she’s half convinced she might drive them off the road if another car passes them anyway.

 

But they get there eventually, and Toni drives up behind her trailer, the car coming to a halt out of sight. A heavy, relieved exhale leaves her lips as she looks up to the windows of her trailer, finding all the lights off as she’d left them earlier in the evening.

 

It only occurs to her now that there’s the risk that the boys may come knocking at her trailer later, after her unexpected departure from Pop’s, and she really hopes they don’t. Jughead might understand her good intention behind offering Cheryl refuge, given the fact that he’s definitely more rational-minded than her two best friends, and also dating Betty Cooper who Toni knows is, by association, a friend of Cheryl’s. But Sweet Pea and Fangs would dub her reckless and stupid, no doubt, they wouldn’t understand that not only does she want to ensure that Cheryl doesn’t try again to do something stupid and hurt herself, but she wants… She wants to be there for her, offer her someone to lean on in this horrible time, when she clearly has _no one_ , otherwise she wouldn’t have found herself seconds away from launching herself into the icy depths of Sweetwater River, where she would undoubtedly never resurface. Not to mention, they would go ballistic to find out that Toni told Cheryl of what they’d done earlier in the night, and while she’s still not totally clear on why she did so, she just knows that Cheryl deserves as much of the truth as she can handle right now. So she hopes they’ll keep their distance, and maybe she’ll send them a message to ward them off.

 

“Is this y-your trailer?” Cheryl’s voice breaks the silence, quiet and scratchy, and it’s evident that she’s been crying from the sound of her it alone. She’s peering out the window, and Toni’s glad that she doesn’t see any signs of judgement in her eyes, but she also thinks that maybe finding herself at Sunnyside trailer park - while pretty unusual - is fairly low down on the list of notable things that have happened today.

 

Toni offers a nod and a small smile. “It’s not much, I know, and it’s a little messy. But-” she begins to justify, admittedly a little hesitant of having a Northsider in her trailer, but Cheryl looks to her with a small shake of her head, hesitating for a long moment before reaching across the console to squeeze Toni’s hand.

 

“It’s home,” she responds, the understanding glaringly prevalent in her eyes. Toni wonders briefly whether Cheryl feels the same about Thornhill. Whether that empty shell of a house that she had crept around earlier with such trepidation, fearful of interrupting the weird, hostile energy that seems imminent in such a place… Toni wonders whether Cheryl thinks of that house as home.

 

“It is,” Toni confirms, hand squeezing Cheryl’s in response. She wants to let her know that it can be a safe place for her too, and yet she doesn’t have the words to say as such, so she hopes that the gesture does the sentiment justice.

 

Cheryl breaks eye contact, and Toni takes that as her cue to unbuckle her seatbelt, killing the engine and tucking the keys away into the her jeans pocket. “Your car will be safe back here, and-” Toni begins, but Cheryl draws in a sharp breath, shaking her head and looking up to Toni once more.

 

“It’s Jason’s car,” she interjects softly, voice low and quiet, yet simultaneously insistent.

 

It seems important to her that Toni knows that, and so she gives a smile, as empathetic as she can muster, and nods. “Right. Well, it will be fine here, okay? And you shouldn’t have to worry about the other Serpents, not at this time of night, but… Keep your head down anyway.”

 

Cheryl gives a dubious nod, and Toni wonders for a second whether bringing her here was really the right choice. But at the end of the day, it was the _only_ choice, and if any of the other Serpents have a problem with it, they’ll go to FP (since, the older Serpents still refuse to acknowledge Jughead as their king, and while Toni felt the same way just a few days ago, she’s not too sure after tonight) and FP would understand. She knows that for sure.

 

“Is- is no one else going to mind me, uh, being here?” Cheryl asks, voice small, and it takes Toni a moment to realise what she’s indirectly asking.

 

She drops Cheryl’s hand, shaking her head as she reaches to open the door. “It’s just me and my uncle. Chances are he won’t be back tonight, but if he is, not to worry he won’t be much of a disturbance,” she says, shaking her head.

 

Getting out of the car, Toni’s gaze is drawn to the strange feat of seeing her Serpent jacket on Cheryl Blossom. She knows now isn’t the time to be thinking this way, but… A smile tugs at her lips even so, an undeniable affection pressing heavier at her chest than ever.

 

She had counted on crashing at Sweet Pea’s tonight, or something, and so she doesn’t have her key with her, resorting to whipping the spare key out from the flower pot beside the steps. It’s the most obvious hiding place ever known to man, and Toni knows that, but there’s nothing really of value inside their trailer, not much that she would miss really.

 

“This way,” Toni says softly, prompting Cheryl because she seems to be almost entirely spaced out, and while it’s worrying, Toni understands.

 

She’s had a hell of a night.

 

Cheryl nods a little distractedly, following Toni up into the trailer, taking a moment to sweep her surroundings with a curious gaze. It leaves Toni feeling unusually bare and stripped of her usual armour for a moment, a spark of fear suddenly shaking her at the thought that, behind those gorgeous brown eyes, Cheryl may be judging her right now. No one at school who isn’t from the Southside knows what the conditions are really like; not even her best friends really know the extent of how Toni spends every day scraping by, penny to penny, hand to mouth. The Serpent jacket slung over her shoulders simply gives her badass credibility at Riverdale High, along with the pink streaks in her hair and the ‘take-no-shit’ attitude… it’s all part of the act that rewards Toni with a shiver of pride every time a freshman shrinks away from her, in fear, in the corridor. It’s something she’s always wanted, _fear_ , and consequently respect, from everyone, because she’s damn sure not going to get that respect any other way… until now, until Cheryl. She doesn’t want Cheryl to fear her, and she’s still not sure why.

 

So now, she finds herself cringing at the sight that greets her; her trailer telling undeniable truth of her life, who she is, who she’s been _raised to be_ … an array of beer cans are sprawled across the living room coffee table, the mess of cushions and dirty clothes scattered across the couch, and the smell… a mixture of the thick stench of alcohol and the coffee she’d made this morning, all hanging in the air.

 

And yet, Cheryl doesn’t seem to display anything but a shred of relief as Toni yanks the door shut behind them, essentially shutting out the rest of the world, the rest of its dangers. All she does is tug Toni’s jacket a little tighter around herself, and the serpent is quick to make her way over to the thermostat, cranking it up a few notches. She feels a flood of relief when the vent beneath her feet _does_ warm up after a few seconds, because that means that FP had successfully transferred the money for the rent.

 

Toni Topaz will survive another day, it seems.

 

The sound of a burst of music breaks through the silence of her trailer. Toni turns around to look at Cheryl in surprise, and it seems to take them both a moment to figure out that it’s a phone ringing. Toni knows straight away that it’s not hers, mostly because she’d never have one of _The Beach Boys’_ songs as her ringtone.

 

Cheryl is fumbling around in her pockets within a few seconds, pulling out her phone, and staring in surprise at the device for a moment, before tapping the screen with shaky fingers and raising it to her ear.

 

“Hello, uh, Veronica?” Cheryl says, clearing her throat as she does so, then swallowing harshly.

 

There’s a long silence, in which Toni can’t hear what’s being said on the other side of the line, but she watches Cheryl draw in a shaky breath, eyes misting over once more, before she’s shaking her head despite the fact that the girl on the other end of the line can’t see her. “No, no, I-I’m safe,” she responds, her voice thick with tears, and Toni can’t help the way that her chest clenches.

 

Maybe it’s a small victory, but it’s true, Cheryl’s safe. And maybe Toni’s partially responsible for that. Aside from her murderous father, Toni has no idea what Cheryl’s home life is like, but if the morsel of information that Cheryl had shared about her mother is anything to go by, then… Toni could truly be offering her the only place of safety that she has to go. And that’s- well, that’s something that means a lot. And she knows that, she’s been there before. Been in the position where she needed someone to turn to, needed a place to go to escape from-

 

_No. Not now. Don’t think of_ **_that_ ** _._

 

“No I’m with a… a friend, Ronnie,” Cheryl says, quietly, and Toni glances over, catching the shy gaze that Cheryl casts her way. She looks uncertain as she speaks the words, and Toni wants to reassure her, wants to give Cheryl an eager nod, and a smile and tell her that, yes, she’ll be her friend or- or whatever Cheryl wants her to be.

 

But she knows that her reputation precedes her, and definitely not in all positive ways, so it understandably may take Cheryl a while to trust that Toni’s here for real. She’s not going to duck and run, she’s not going to turn on her. She wants to be here for Cheryl, however she may need it.

 

“No, you don’t have to come get me. Tell your mom thank you b-but… I’m okay here. I’m safe,” she repeats those two words that have Toni turning away slightly to hide the shadow of a smile on her lips. “I know, thank you… I’ll let you know. B-bye, Ronnie.”

 

Toni wonders why it’s taken Cheryl’s ‘best friend’ so long to call her, when Betty had alerted Jughead _over_ an hour ago about what had happened with Cheryl’s father. She’s not an expert on Veronica Lodge or anything, but she knows for sure that if anything of this magnitude happened to Sweet Pea or Fangs, the second she heard about it, she would be blowing up their phones if she was unable to get to their trailer.

 

She doesn’t want to judge, though. It’s not her place, she reminds herself firmly.

 

“Could I get some water, please?” Cheryl’s voice once again breaks the silence, words laced with a shy tremble, and Toni turns around to give a small nod and - what she hopes is - a reassuring smile.

 

“Sure.” Toni pauses, eyes scanning over Cheryl, her posture rigid and guarded, hands tucked into the pockets of her Serpent jacket but Toni thinks they might be shaking. “You can sit down if you’d like. Make yourself at home, yeah?”

 

Cheryl’s lips curl upwards into another shy smile. Toni tries her best not to focus on how adorable that is, simply returning the gesture, and making her way into the kitchen. The mess that greets her has her holding back a wince of displeasure; not to mention the _smell_. She never usually notices how bad it is, and she assumes it’s because she’s so conscious of Cheryl judging her, for whatever the reason is that she suddenly cares so deeply for her wellbeing and perhaps even approval.

 

Returning with a glass of water as promised, Toni stops short in the doorway leading to the living room, because Cheryl has taken a seat on the couch, and removed the Serpent jacket from her shoulders, in effect exposing her bare arms which are… littered in bruises. The darkness outside must have concealed the discolouration of her skin before, and yet Toni isn’t sure how she missed it.

 

Toni _knows_ bruises like those. She knows that rings of black and blue around your arms, patches of purpling skin, are typically only the consequence of one kind of thing, one type of violence. Toni’s _had_ those bruises, she’s-  

 

She breathes a gasp before she can stop herself, and Cheryl’s head snaps up, eyes wide and worried. Her face is the epitome of a deer caught in headlights, suddenly scrabbling with the jacket in a shaky attempt to cover herself back up again, but she seems to realise it pointless, and drops the jacket back into her lap with a trembling exhale.

 

“Cheryl…” Toni sets the glass down on the coffee table, taking a seat beside Cheryl, eyes fixed on the girl, wide with worry. Closer now, she can see the bruises better, and the welts that stand out against the ivory skin, undeniably intentional, if that wasn’t already evident from the pain in the girl’s telling eyes. “Cheryl, what-”

 

“Please don’t,” Cheryl’s voice is no more than a whimper, and she bows her head, fingers digging into her thighs as she does. “I c-can’t, Toni, please…”

 

Toni knows. She _knows_ , has been there, has felt the pain. She knows the deep rooted fear and shame that’s flooding Cheryl with each passing moment that Toni’s eyes remained trained on the _evidence_ of violent inflictions marking her skin. But she also knows it’s not her place. Cheryl doesn’t owe her anything, isn’t obligated to share or confide, and maybe she will in due time, and maybe she won’t. It’s not Toni’s place to decide as such, and she knows that. If anyone had asked her such questions about the bruises marking her skin, those years ago, she knows that she would have had a similar reaction.

 

“Do you want me to see if I have any ice? It could help,” she suggests, after a long silence. She doesn’t want to invade, but she’s not going to let Cheryl sit there in pain if there’s something that she can do to ease it.

 

Cheryl purses her lips, looking up at her with a small shake of her head, but Toni can see that she’s grateful for not being questioned further. “It was almost a day ago, ice won’t help now,” she responds softly, and despite the sinking feeling in her stomach, Toni gives a nod.

 

She doesn’t want to think about how those bruises got there, and yet her anger towards Cheryl’s parents has just increased tenfold. She’s not sure which of them is responsible, but she wouldn’t put it past either of them. She doesn’t know much of the Blossoms, but she does know of their notorious evil. Everyone does. And while Toni prides herself on being able to take measures of self defence in any situation necessary, and has been known to make the odd empty threat promising violence, even throwing playful punches at her friends… she would never, ever lay her hands on someone with the intention to harm them, for any reason other than protecting herself or someone she cares about. And the notion of someone wanting to harm their own child in that way, makes her feel sick.

 

Yet once again, she reminds herself to keep her emotions in check, maintain control over her rising feelings. _It’s not her place._

 

Forcing a breath of air into her lungs with another nod that indicates her restored confidence, and a small, but present, smile, she turns to face Cheryl once more. “What d’you day we watch a film?” Toni nods towards the small box TV in the corner of the living room. “I know it’s not the seventy inch flat-screen that you’re used to, but… A pleasant distraction?” she suggests, eyes scouring Cheryl’s face.

 

Looking up with a small breathy chuckle, Cheryl nods, carefully setting aside the Serpent jacket bundled in her arms, folding it over the arm of the couch. Toni appreciates the effort. “A film sounds good, Toni.”

 

Hiding a relieved sigh behind another smile, Toni glances towards the old DVR player sat on the television table. She sucks in a breath of air through her teeth, giving a teasingly solemn shake of her head, “I have a total of two films, both pirated, so it’s a choice between cam quality _Titanic_ or _Bridesmaids_ ; take your pick.”

 

“Any other day I would vote for Kate Winslet, but I think the comedy of _Bridesmaids_ would serve as a better distraction right now,” Cheryl chuckles, leaning back slightly against the couch, an amiable smile on her cherry red lips.

 

Toni can’t help but be curious about her Kate Winslet comment, because, she’s certain that almost every straight girl ever watches that film solely for _young_ _Leonardo DiCaprio_ , and while she knows she shouldn’t base assumptions about Cheryl’s sexuality off of a flippant remark… well, her attention is piqued.

 

Even so, she smiles, standing to move towards the DVR. “Bridesmaids it is. There’s nothing better than a rom-com to lift your spirits.”

 

And she’s proven to be right. Because less than an hour later, Toni finds herself no longer watching the film playing out on the screen, her attention instead focused on Cheryl. She’s trying to maintain the facade of following the movie, but in reality she’s all but enamoured, eyes on Cheryl and realising how screwed she is because… that girl has got the most beautiful laugh in the world.

 

_Oh fuck._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> only realised upon editing that this chapter starts and ends with the word fuck. oh well. we'll go with it. 
> 
> your comments, kudos n stuff make my day; i hope you enjoyed it!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhh yeah, another chapter... a thing kinda almost happens sooo, read on. 
> 
> also, i've posted a new oneshot collection fic, so go check that out if you like! anddd enjoy :)

 

The overhead fan in Toni’s bedroom is a lot noisier than anything Cheryl is used to having to tolerate when trying to get to sleep. It makes a repetitive clicking motion with each spin, and it’s driving Cheryl crazy. She’s not sure that it’s the only reason she’s unable to close her eyes and actually get to sleep, but it’s the easiest to focus on right now.

 

Toni had insisted that Cheryl take her bedroom, promising that sleeping on the couch would not be a problem for her. Of course Cheryl had attempted to object, not wanting to steal the girl’s bed, but it all but fell upon deaf ears, and she didn’t have much energy to fight it anyway; her entire body almost _aching_ with fatigue by the time the movie finished.

 

So here she is, lying in (contrary to her four poster bed with Egyptian-cotton sheets and silk pillows) a slightly scratchy and strangely small bed, wearing an oversized shirt with a big ‘S’ on the front that she assumes stands for _Serpents_ , and she’s doing her best not to focus on the fact that everything around her smells like Toni Topaz.

 

It’s not a bad thing, not by any means, but now isn’t the time for her to be focusing on any feelings that she may or may not (but definitely does) have for the Serpent girl. For whatever reason that Cheryl is unable to pinpoint just yet, Toni has been kind enough to open up her home to her. Yes, it may not quite be the living conditions that Cheryl’s used to, but the underlying fumes of alcohol, and looming danger that awaits beyond the trailer itself, all aside, it’s more homely than Thornhill has ever been.

 

Cheryl feels _safe_.

 

She’s not sure whether that’s something to do with Toni herself, or just the fact that her father… The _monster_ who has done nothing but bring her pain for her whole life, is finally gone. And while Cheryl does feel the grief of her loss - of course she does, he’s her father - she also feels a heavy relief, although it brings her immense guilt to admit as such, even to herself. But Clifford Blossom was an abusive piece of trash who murdered her brother, and Cheryl knows that even if he is, or was, her father, she has the right to find some form of peace in his death.

 

So while his sudden demise plays a role in Cheryl’s eased sense of fear, she knows that her knight in shining armour, who presented herself in the form of Toni Topaz, also is largely responsible. Cheryl isn’t all too sure what was going through her head, just hours prior to this moment, she just knows… It was a flurry of panic, a whirlwind of pain and anguish after a sudden revelation and loss of hope that left her feeling utterly defeated and desperate to be reunited with her brother. And while she would still give anything to see Jason again, of course, and this night has done nothing but flare the pain and grief of his loss once more… She’s so glad that Toni arrived in time to stop her from making a decision that would have almost certainly killed her. She saved her **life** , and that’s a debt that Cheryl isn’t sure how she’ll begin to repay.

 

Not only that, but she’s showing a kindness and side of herself that Cheryl hadn’t known existed. She’s not entirely sure what she did to warrant Toni offering her shelter and safety this way, whether it’s out of pity or something else, but she’s _eternally_ grateful that she’s here rather than back at Thornhill with Penelope who would undoubtedly be channelling her twisted grief and rage into some form of abuse upon Cheryl. This is all simply proving to her that there’s so much more to the pink-haired serpent, beyond intimidating glares in the corridor and the facade of ‘big bad gang member’, than Cheryl ever could have imagined.

 

She eventually realises that there’s no way she’s going to get any sleep just lying here staring at the ceiling fan, despite how exhausted her body feels. She decides to go to the kitchen and get herself a glass of water - not for any purpose of quenching a thirst, but simply to move around a little.

 

Cheryl does her best to be quiet, but as soon as she creeps out of Toni’s bedroom and reaches the end of the corridor, she’s able to see the figure on the couch shifting and sitting up, Toni’s face lit dimly by the beams of moonlight streaming in through the rickety blinds of the trailer window. “Cheryl?” Toni speaks softly, running a hand through her hair as she offers a smile. “Are you okay?”

 

Swallowing harshly and pulling Toni’s shirt a little further down her thighs, she gives a small smile in response and a nod. “Yeah, I’m… I’m okay, I just couldn’t sleep,” she says, taking a few more paces forward, leaning slightly against the doorway of the living room as Toni reaches out to flick the side table light on. “I’m sorry if I woke you, I was just going to grab some water, or something.”

 

“It’s alright, you didn’t, I couldn’t sleep either,” Toni chuckles softly, adding a nonchalant shrug as she pushes herself up off the couch. Stretching her arms into the air, her shirt hitches up slightly, and Cheryl does her best not to focus on the tan skin of Toni’s admittedly _very_ toned abdomen that she’s exposed in the process. “I’ll grab you some water if you like.”

 

“Oh, no that’s alright. I’m not really thirsty I just had to get up rather than lying there restlessly,” Cheryl sighs, and despite her sleeplessness, her legs still feel a little unsteady and weak with her enervation.

 

Toni sighs softly and nods. “I get that. I never used to be able to get to sleep easily, and I would always go on walks to clear my head a little. Of course, that’s probably not a viable option anymore, but the Southside was a lot more legitimate when I was younger. Sunnyside trailer park was… safer.” There’s a hint of sadness in Toni’s voice as she speaks, and Cheryl frowns, nodding slowly.

 

It’s only now that the mention of Toni’s childhood has arisen that she begins to wonder how exactly it is that Toni seems to live by herself. She doesn’t remember her saying anything yesterday about her parents… she vaguely recalls the mention of an uncle, but nothing specific. “Have you lived here all your life, then?” Cheryl asks softly, folding her arms across her chest and leaning against the doorframe. She hopes she doesn’t sound too interrogative, but she’s interested to learn more about the ins and outs of Toni Topaz.

 

“The trailer park? Yeah. This trailer? No, I… our old one was bigger, and pretty nice. Well, as nice as trailers can get, I suppose,” Toni slowly sits back down on the couch, bundling up the blankets that she’d been lying beneath and pushing them aside, patting the spot beside her. “Come sit.”

 

Cheryl only hesitates for a second, briefly stuck between not wanting to interrupt anymore of Toni’s sleep and desperately wanting to talk to the girl, before she makes her decision and walks over to sit beside Toni, leaving enough of a gap that it’s not too weird. “No I like your trailer, I think it’s very… authentic and hospitable.”

 

Toni snorts softly, lips curling up into an amused smile as she turns her head to look at Cheryl. “Thanks, Blossom, but I know it’s not quite the five star residencies that you’re used to.”

 

Sighing quietly, Cheryl smiles in return, shrugging her shoulders. She tips her head in thought. “Thornhill doesn’t have the warmest energy. It- it never has done.”

 

“I noticed,” Toni responds softly, and it takes Cheryl a moment to remember what she means. “I also… I understand how hard it can be to live in a place so full of memories, of someone you’ve lost. Good or bad, it doesn’t matter, it’s hard.” Toni’s staring at her, face so sincere, eyes holding such empathy that Cheryl is unable to do anything but be completely honest and open.

 

She gives a nod, dropping her gaze to her lap and catching her bottom lip between her teeth. “Yeah. It’s like everywhere I look, little pieces of J… of Jason, are right there. Tiny little reminders of him, in every corner of the house, almost as though he’s still there. Except, he’s **not** . And that-” Cheryl cuts off, her voice dipping with emotion. It's been a matter of months, but even talking about Jason still hurts, still has her chest clenching painfully, _heart_ aching at the reminder of her loss. Clearing her throat, she shakes her head and continues. “ _-that_ , hurts more than anything.”

 

Toni reaches out, taking Cheryl almost entirely by surprise when she encloses her hands in her own. Toni has small hands, slightly calloused assumably from riding her motorcycle, but they’re warm, and the contact sends a pleasant shiver up Cheryl’s spine. “You’ve been through so much, Cheryl. I’m sure that I don’t even know the half of it, but even I can safely assume that these last few months have been hell on earth for you. That house? It holds all those memories for you, every haunting detail of it. That’s not something you want to be around.”

 

Cheryl wonders how Toni is managing to capture how she’s feeling so perfectly, and the prevalent understanding in her eyes… god, there’s so much more to Toni Topaz than she’s aware of, and she knows it. To sit before her with such empathy and reason, she must’ve felt her own pain, suffered her own loss, been _hurt_ before. The idea of it saddens her, but she can’t help but be grateful that Toni’s acting so selflessly as her anchor right now.

 

“What I’m trying to say, Cheryl, is that I understand. I’ve been in need of a place to go, before, I’ve been in the position of running from… someone, and something, and so I know how helpless you feel. And you have a safe haven here for as long as you need. I’m not going to turn you out, or anything like that,” Toni says, squeezing Cheryl’s hands firmly in her own.

 

Processing Toni’s words, Cheryl swallows harshly, shaking her head. “Toni, I… I couldn’t. You’ve done nothing but show me unadulterated kindness so far. You saved my life, you’ve opened your home to me, and you’re sitting awake at three in the morning helping to shoulder my burdens. I couldn’t expect more, I-”

 

“Cheryl,” Toni’s voice is firm, but not unkind. Her hand slowly slips out of Cheryl’s grip, up her arm, brushing softly at the bruises on her alabaster skin. “I am not letting you go back to a house where they did this to you. I don’t know who it was, your mother or father, but it doesn’t matter. Any parent that allows this to happen to their child is not someone that you should be around. I’m… god, I know people think I’m a bitch, but I’m not a monster, Cheryl. I’m not letting you go back there.”

 

Blinking rapidly to keep building tears at bay, Cheryl drops her gaze. “You’re the furthest thing from a monster, Toni Topaz,” she replies, voice cracking despite her attempts to repress her emotions. “But… b-but why do you care so much? Y-you’d never spoken so much as a word to me, before a couple of weeks ago. We… I’d like to think we’re friends now, I would, but you don’t owe me anything, Toni. Why are you being so kind?”

 

Toni huffs out a sigh, hand moving slowly up Cheryl’s arm, fingers brushing her skin gently in an act of comfort. “You don’t see it, do you?” she murmurs softly, breathing a quiet, humourless chuckle. “Cheryl, you’re quite possibly the most selfless person I’ve ever met. Despite the fact that my friends were utter dicks to you, and I honestly didn’t do much to stop it. None of our reasons were good enough justifications to take it out on **you** , and yet, you were still _beyond_ friendly to me. I’m not sure what it is, Cheryl, but you just- you’re someone that I can’t help but be drawn to. You-” Toni cuts herself off, wetting her lips and tilting her head “-you make me feel like I’m a _better person_ when I’m around you, Cheryl.”

 

Cheryl stares at Toni for a few moments, head spinning slightly as she processes her words. Until this point, a small part of her has still been in fear that maybe Toni has been doing _all_ of this out of pity, out of necessity, or fear that Cheryl will run straight back to Sweetwater River if Toni turns her away. But now? Well now…

 

Her stomach flutters, and she can feel the thoughts that her mother and father so easily labelled _deviant_ rising, once more. She can’t keep them held down when Toni’s giving her those eyes, that look, so earnest and… perhaps wanting? Is Cheryl crazy to imagine that perhaps, _perhaps_ , Toni feels all of this too? After what’s she’s just said…

 

“T-Toni,” Cheryl breathes quietly, the hand that’s still rested in the serpent’s, squeezing carefully. Her gaze flickers from Toni’s own deep, caramel eyes, and down to her lips; soft, plush, _kissable._ Cheryl’s cheeks burn at the thought alone, a guilt settling in the pit of her stomach and she forces her eyes back up to meet Toni’s.

 

Toni’s eyes snap up to meet her own, almost at the same time, and they’re darker than before, overcome with something that is so unmistakably _longing_ , or perhaps nothing quite so intense, but it’s present all the same. And Cheryl can’t unsee the way which the pink-haired girl is regarding her, now. The feel of Toni’s hand in her own is suddenly electric, and she’s aware of the tiny circles that her fingers are brushing on the skin of Cheryl’s arm… it’s all amplified tenfold, the atmosphere around them perhaps buzzing in anticipation.

 

Cheryl wonders whether she’s about to have her first kiss.

 

“Cheryl,” Toni’s voice is clearer than hers had been; the low, rasp of her voice breaking through the heavy silence, but not disrupting it, “Cheryl, we…”

 

Tongue darting out to wet her bottom lip, Cheryl nods, wanting Toni to continue but also unsure if she can pay attention to anything that’s said right now. And then the said girl’s eyes snap down to her lips, only momentarily, but Cheryl catches it. She catches it, and she decides to be brave.

 

She inhales softly, eyes scouring over Toni’s face, her flawless skin, each divot and crevice of her face, her cheekbones, her jawline, Cheryl takes it all in. And then she’s leaning closer, closing the already decreasing gap between them, her hand gripping onto Toni’s, probably too tight, but she’s only a small distance away when-

 

Toni draws in a sharp breath of air and pulls back, away from her. Cheryl’s cheeks are suddenly burning, and she drops her gaze to her lap, an irrational yet _crushing_ heavy weight suddenly sitting on her chest, anxiety skyrocketing.

 

_No, no, no…_ why did she do that? Of course Toni doesn’t like her like that, of course she was simply being an understanding _friend_ , Cheryl should have never let her **deviant** thoughts get in the way of that. She shouldn’t have allowed them to cloud her judgement, cloud her rationale, let her make a spontaneous and stupid decision that she _regrets…_

 

“Oh god, I-I’m sorry, that… I shouldn’t h-have done that, I-” Cheryl begins to ramble, embarrassment building as she does everything within her power to avoid meeting Toni’s gaze.

 

But she’s suddenly cut off, by the feel off two soft hands against her cheeks, tilting her head upwards, ever so gently but firmly enough that she’s forced to comply and meet Toni’s gaze. She expects to see anger, or disappointment - the emotions that have grown all too familiar to see in the eyes of Penelope Blossom as her mother glares down at her disapprovingly - or at very least _mocking_ , but instead…

 

Toni’s smiling, eyebrows raised slightly in understanding, and Cheryl feels confusion swirling in her stomach until the girl opens her mouth to speak. “Hey it’s okay, don’t apologise. I want to kiss you too, Cheryl, I _do._ Just… not right now, not while you’re feeling like this,” Toni murmurs softly, and her thumbs are stroking soft repetitive circles on Cheryl’s jaw. “You’re super emotional right now, and running on no sleep, and I’m not in the business of taking advantage of vulnerable girls, okay?”

 

Blinking in surprise, Cheryl stares at Toni for a moment or two, feeling all but dumbstruck. “You want to kiss me too?” she echoes quietly, almost tempted to pinch herself and make sure this isn’t some strange, elaborate dream that her brain has concocted. Because, god, _Toni wants her too?_ That seems so far beyond impossible, and yet it’s happening, and Cheryl can’t quite believe it.

 

Toni’s lips curl upwards into a smile, and she nods her head fervently. “Of course I do,” she responds so earnestly and sincerely, that Cheryl almost wants to cry in happiness.

 

“O-oh, well that’s good,” she manages to say, doing her best to hold back the exploding excitement that’s vibrating within her, her cheeks burning red again, and Toni laughs softly. Not cruelly, though, it’s perhaps… affectionate? Cheryl isn’t sure, but either way it makes her smile too, eyes a little teary and clouded from the high emotions of the moment.

 

All of a sudden she finds herself yawning, and she drops one of Toni’s hands to cover her mouth, ducking her head with a quiet chuckle. “Apparently I’m tired now,” she says, and Toni grins softly, nodding and rubbing her arm carefully.

 

“You’ve had… a busy night. You should try to get some more sleep now, okay?” Toni suggests, resting back against the couch cushions a little more, seemingly unable to disguise her own fatigue any longer either.

 

Swallowing, Cheryl nods but doesn’t say anything. There’s a question on the tip of her tongue, but as usual she finds herself held back by her own nagging worries and hesitations.

 

“Cheryl?” Toni prompts softly, giving a small smile and a knowing tip of her head, “what is it?”

 

“I-I don’t want to cross a line, or anything, but could you possibly…” she falters, looking towards Toni’s bedroom as she scrapes her teeth across her bottom lip. “I couldn’t get to sleep by myself, so could you, maybe, lie with me? To sleep?”

 

Toni’s face breaks out into a smile. “Are you asking me to _sleep with you_ , Cheryl?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows teasingly, prompting Cheryl to all but choke out a splutter of surprise.

 

Her cheeks redden, eyes widening. “I-I… _Toni_!” she settles with exclaiming, indignantly, dropping her gaze to her lap in embarrassment; Toni knows just how to tease her.

 

“Hey, relax. I’m just kidding; you’re cute when you’re flustered. Of course I’ll lie with you,” Toni murmurs, nails lightly scratching against the skin of her wrist absentmindedly. Cheryl feels almost instantly at ease, giving Toni a shy smile and a nod.

 

She wonders how it’s possible that Toni has made her feel _so_ much better, in less than half an hour.

 

Following Toni down the corridor to her bedroom, Cheryl can’t help but feel a little shy. Toni had just admitted to wanting to kiss _her_ , and Cheryl’s never been with anyone like that before. She’s never had anyone in her life who’s interested in her like that before (neither boy, nor girl) and it’s completely unchartered territory for her. She’s had her fair share of crushes, indeed; her best friend Heather in junior high, Josie McCoy, and even a short term infatuation with Veronica. But she’s never voiced her feelings before, never _acted_ on them, never had them reciprocated. Her exquisite yet secretive captivations have never left the confinement of the many hardcover sketchbooks that she’s become good at hiding in the most inconspicuous spots of Thornhill. Containing sketches she couldn’t _bear_ to show anyone else; couldn’t safely expose herself because look what happened when her parents found a relatively harmless paper copy of Toni… Cheryl can’t stomach the thought of what could’ve befallen her if they’d found one of her more _risqué_ sketches. The thought alone ignites a spark of embarrassment within her.

 

“Cheryl… hey, are you okay?” Toni inquires softly, stepping into Cheryl’s line of sight, brow furrowed into a concerned frown.

 

Feeling an unfamiliar warmth in her chest at being asked such a customary question, yet one she’s not used to being _genuinely_ asked, Cheryl gives a small smile and a quick nod. “I’m okay,” she confirms softly, because she’s far too tired to divulge anymore of her innermost thoughts tonight. After a hesitation, she steps into Toni’s room and nods to the bed, a smile tugging at her lips. “Do you take the left or right side?”

 

“Well it’s a single bed, so usually the middle, but I’ll take whichever,” Toni says, and Cheryl giggles softly, shaking her head at Toni.

 

“I… usually sleep on the right,” Cheryl says, and Toni gestures towards it with a smile.

 

The nerves are back as Cheryl slips beneath the covers once more, lip caught between her teeth. A little tense, she rests back against the pillow, watching Toni flick off the hall light before ambling over and lying down beside her. There’s a small gap between them, but barely any room for them to be doing so, and Cheryl couldn’t physically press herself any closer to the wall. Not out of any aversion towards being close to Toni, but simply hesitant to do anything _wrong_.

 

There’s a silence only disrupted by the sound of the fan clicking round overhead, both Cheryl and Toni staring up at it silently for a few moments. Toni shifts slightly on the bed, and Cheryl turns her head to look at her and sees that she’s stuck her hand out, in the space between them on the bed, palm upwards. Hesitating, and glancing to Toni, Cheryl’s cheeks warm once more at the soft smile Toni gives her. She wastes no time in sliding her hand into the serpent’s, fingers entwining.

 

She sees Toni smile in her peripheral vision.

 

“Goodnight Toni,” Cheryl murmurs after a while, finding her eyelids are in fact beginning to feel heavy now, and she’s most likely on the cusp of her consciousness.

 

Toni squeezes her hand gently, thumb brushing a small circle over Cheryl’s knuckles. “Night Cheryl,” she murmurs, lips twitching, “Sweet dreams.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so thAt happened. i won't make y'all wait long, don't worry :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay! here we go. sorry i missed last week’s update, i’m struggling big time with writing at the moment, but i’m doing my best. hope you enjoy this chapter! it’s a bit of a filler and kinda short but uh... some stuff kinda happens i suppose ;)
> 
> also i’m actively using twitter now so, talk to me on there if you like !! it’s @chxrylblossomx

 

The next day passes mostly in an indescribable blur. Sunday morning has Toni taking a visit to Jughead’s trailer to borrow some films for her and Cheryl to watch (majority being old classics such as The Breakfast Club, that Cheryl seems to have a secret affinity for). Sunday also brings her uncle ducking in mid-morning, amidst their viewing of Rocky. He’s barely there ten minutes, and although he reeks just as much of alcohol as the whole trailer itself does, he seems not to be too drunk. At least not enough for it to noticeably inhibit him. Greeting Toni with a grunt and failing to acknowledge Cheryl, he stumbles into his bedroom, disappearing off again after just a few minutes in there. No doubt back to the Whyte Wyrm, Toni thinks with a tight grimace.

 

She exhales in shaky relief as soon as the trailer door bangs closed behind him, allowing herself to fester in the relief that he won’t be around to cause anymore unrest than Cheryl’s already experiencing at the moment. He’s not unkind, not really, but if Toni’s learnt anything through the years of living with her uncle, it’s that anyone who stands in the way of him getting his fill of alcohol is a mortal enemy.

 

Cheryl looks to her nervously, wetting her lips and giving a small smile. “Your uncle?” she asks, tilting her head. “I-I… remember you mentioning something about him last night. I’m not too sure though, it’s all a bit foggy.”

 

“Understandably,” Toni nods, and then sighs. “Yeah my uncle. He-” she cuts herself off with a tight-lipped smile, though, because there’s not much else to say about Harry Topaz that doesn’t involve her divulging further information on her personal life that is… irrelevant right now.

 

Cheryl hesitates, smiling softly at Toni. “Carry on. You have more to say, right?” she prompts, and Toni blinks in surprise. It’s true, she does, but she’s not sure if Cheryl’s really up for hearing about her tragic backstory right now. The girl has enough of her own going on as it is.

 

“No, it’s okay. That’s all.”

 

It’s almost as though Cheryl reads her thoughts, though, because she shakes her head a little. “It’s okay, Toni. You don’t have to, but I… I won’t judge you, or anything. I honestly don’t think I have the grounds to, even if I wanted to.”

 

Giving a small empathetic smile, the serpent sighs and shrugs her shoulders. “He’s my dad’s brother. He took me in after my parents…” she trails off, catching her lip between her teeth and drumming her fingers against her thighs. “After my dad passed, and my mom just- well, she isn’t in the picture anymore.”

 

Swallowing harshly, Toni tries to keep all the looming unsavoury memories from resurfacing. A lot of that time is blocked from her memory, and she doesn’t want to shatter that tenuous barrier, because she’s not sure how she would begin to cope if it all came rushing back.

 

“I-I’m so sorry, Toni,” Cheryl says, and Toni feels a warm hand against her knee, squeezing lightly. For once, the sentence doesn’t sound patronising, or dripping with forced sympathy - it sounds genuine. “How old were you?” she asks, tentatively.

 

“My uncle took me in when I was fifteen. But, uh, my dad died two years before that,” Toni explains, and she gives a small smile, exhaling shakily. She misses him, of course she does. But now, looking back, it’s easier to remember him with a smile on her face, rather than tears in her eyes. She prefers to cling onto the happy memories, rather than those of him in his last moments, after the-

 

She pushes that particular memory down, swallowing the lump in her throat.

 

“Is that what you meant when you said you know how it feels? To live in a house, a place, so full of memories?” Cheryl asks, and Toni pauses, clearing her throat with a slight nod.

 

Cheryl waits patiently, intense brown eyes watching her closely.

 

“Yeah. I guess it is,” Toni sighs, running a hand through her hair out of habit, and dropping her gaze to her lap. “After my dad died… Everything reminded me of him. Cartoons on Saturday morning, the smell of cooking filling the trailer after school… hell, even the Serpent jackets made me think of him. It didn’t help that-” she cuts herself off, before she can say what she’s really thinking. It didn’t help that my mother blamed me for it.

 

Cheryl knows that she’s holding back, because she squeezes her knee gently, and when Toni looks up, she gives a small encouraging nod.

 

“It didn’t help that my mother thought it was my fault. She… she would tell me every day, how it should’ve been me rather than him. That I was to blame,” Toni allows a shaky exhale to escape her lips, placing her hand on top of Cheryl’s to keep herself grounded. Her head spins slightly at the mention of her mother, because while she can think back on her dad with more of a smile on her face, it’s not quite the same for her mom.

 

Cheryl hesitates, brushing her thumb over Toni’s knuckles. “H-how did it happen, Toni?” she asks, and Toni draws in a sharp breath at the question.

 

Memories of guns, and gangs, and snippets of blood and screaming flash through her head. She remembers that day like it was yesterday; most of it, anyway. The Ghoulies surrounding them, nameless faces wearing sneering expression, a hand holding a gun to Toni’s head, pressing the cold metal barrel to her temple, her dad screaming and shouting, a bang— Goosebumps erupt on Toni’s skin as a shiver runs through her body.

 

“He was shot,” she says quietly, exhaling shakily. “We… we were surrounded by Ghoulies. They threatened to shoot me if my dad didn’t do as they asked - I can’t even remember what they wanted - but he went for them. He tried to save me. It was stupid, they had a gun, he could’ve never-” a whine almost escapes her lips as a sob rises in her throat, and she draws her hand away from Cheryl’s to wipe a stray tear from her cheek. “They shot him. I don’t think they ever planned to, because they freaked out and ran, and… I tried to call for help, but, I was… fuck, I was frozen. Trying to help him and trying not to panic and… yeah. It all happened too fast, and by the time the paramedics got there, there was nothing they could’ve done anyway.”

 

After a few moments, Toni feels shaky fingers against her cheek, brushing away the tears that unwillingly escaped her eyes, and it makes her smile slightly, lifting her gaze to meet Cheryl’s. She’s surprised to see nothing but understanding in her eyes; understanding and empathy, but no superficial pity. Cheryl offers a hesitant smile, her hand falling slightly to cup Toni’s cheek, and Toni remembers doing the same for her just yesterday.

 

Toni exhales softly, giving Cheryl a watery-eyed smile, swallowing harshly. She’s glad that Cheryl hasn’t chosen to speak yet, because she’s not sure that she’ll be able to continue once she’s stopped. “You know that I… I told you I’d been where you were? When you were…” Toni trails off, not exactly wanting to remind Cheryl of the traumatic events of the previous night.

 

Cheryl gives a wordless nod, her thumb brushing over the caramel skin of Toni’s cheek.

 

“After my dad died,” she exhales softly, tracing a soft pattern on her knee and trying to calm her racing heart, “I tried to… uh, kill myself. Not- not immediately. But my mom, she… she made it really fucking hard for me to want to live,” Toni says, releasing a humourless chuckle, and she feels Cheryl’s thumb still on her face. She winces.

 

“Did she hurt you?” Cheryl asks, not forcefully, but gentle and prompting. Her other hand falls to settle on top of Toni’s on her knee, and Toni feels comforted.

 

Enough so to sigh quietly and nod. “Yeah. She did,” Toni pauses, gaze falling to Cheryl’s bare arms, discoloured with purpling bruises, and she pushes down the sickness she feels at the thought of the people who did that to her. “Never that badly, but-” she begins, but she’s cut off by Cheryl squeezing her hand tightly.

 

“Abuse is abuse, Toni. It isn’t comparable. Don’t belittle your own experiences, d-don’t do that,” Cheryl says, firmly, eyes shining slightly, and only now does Toni notice that she looks to be on the verge of tears herself.

 

She nods slowly, squeezing Cheryl’s hand in return. “You’re right, I know, I’m just used to brushing it off,” she sighs quietly and drops her gaze. “It was bad, I guess. And it got to the point where I couldn’t really do it anymore. And…” Subconsciously, her gaze drifts down to her arm, despite the fact that her sleeve covers the scar that she’s grown to so heavily detest.

 

Cheryl wets her lips, drawing in a sharp breath as her fingers brush at the palm of Toni’s hand, before resting on the fabric of her sleeve. “May I?” she asks softly, eyes meeting Toni’s, soft and asking.

 

Toni finds herself nodding, blinking rapidly to hold back her tears as Cheryl pulls up the sleeve of her flannel, just up to her mid-forearm. Toni forces herself to look away, not sure what Cheryl’s reaction will be, not sure if she could bare to see disgust or judgement; although that may be an unreasonable prediction. She feels Cheryl’s warm fingers brushing against her wrist and goosebumps erupt on her skin.

 

“Toni…” Cheryl murmurs softly, the hand still against her cheek moving carefully, and her fingers stroking Toni’s jawline carefully.

 

Toni can’t bring herself to look at her. She simply nods her head, keeping her gaze fixed just over Cheryl’s shoulder.

 

“Toni, look at me,” Cheryl speaks quietly, brushing against her cheek once more, before Toni drops her gaze to the girl sat before her.

 

Cheryl’s not looking at her in disgust, or disappointment, or anything of the kind. But once again; understanding. Of course she is, god, she’s so fucking perfect-

 

“You’re so strong, Toni,” Cheryl says, voice quiet but heavy with conviction and earnestness. She pulls Toni’s sleeve down once more, squeezing her hand. “I-I can’t imagine what all that must’ve been like for you. You’re… so strong.”

 

Toni watches her for a second longer, before smiling softly and bringing her hand up to dab at her eyes, and Cheryl suddenly looks a little shy as she smiles in return. “You’re strong, too, Cheryl. You know that, right?” Toni says, tipping her head slightly and revelling in the warmth of Cheryl’s hand against her cheek. “So brave, after everything. You’re incredible, Cheryl, and I… I’m going to do my best to make sure no one ever hurts you again.”

 

Cheryl ducks her gaze slightly but doesn’t let her smile slip. Her cheeks flush a soft red though, and it almost makes Toni chuckle. She’s not sure she’ll ever tire of making Cheryl Blossom blush. “I guess we’re both pretty amazing then,” Cheryl responds softly, and Toni isn’t sure whether Cheryl believes her own words, but she’s determined to make sure that she will - eventually, at least.

 

“Yeah, I guess so,” Toni chuckles quietly, sliding Cheryl’s hand from her cheek, and taking it into her own. That brings Cheryl’s attention to her again, and Toni offers a small smile. “So… that thing, that almost happened last night.”

 

There’s no doubt for either of them about what she’s referring to.

 

Cheryl looks nervous, nodding, hesitating. “I… I’m…” she seems to try to begin an explanation, eyes a little jittery with anxiety, and Toni’s quick to squeeze her hands gently, and comfortingly.

 

“Hey, it’s okay, calm down,” she murmurs, deciding it’s now her time to comfort Cheryl. She herself is pretty comfortable in her bisexuality, and has been since she was about twelve, but she’s not too sure if it’s the same for Cheryl. She’s going to take a wild guess and assume that it’s not. “Tell me… have you ever kissed anyone before?” she asks.

 

Cheryl’s cheeks burn, and she drops her gaze. “I-I… well, I…” she chokes out, and Toni almost laughs at her adorable flusteredness, but she’s not sure if Cheryl would interpret it wrong; as her maliciously making fun of her, which she just wouldn’t do.

 

“It’s okay, Cheryl,” she murmurs, smiling and shaking her head. “I’d be honoured to be your first… kiss,” she says, a little teasingly because she can’t help it.

 

The proposition seems to overwhelm the girl slightly, and Toni wonders how long Cheryl’s been interested in her for, and how she didn’t notice before last night, but she thinks maybe that’s a question better for later - the same for questioning where exactly she believes she lies on the Kinsey scale.

 

Cheryl seems to pause for a few moments, before she blushes even deeper and nods her head quickly. “I-I’d like that, Toni. I’d like that a lot,” she agrees softly, and Toni decides to cease the moment before doubts hinder the both of them.

 

“Okay then,” she murmurs, drawing in a soft breath, and shifting a little closer to Cheryl. She brushes her hand against her thigh carefully, before resting her hand there and meeting Cheryl’s gaze. Her nerves are prevalent, and Toni squeezes her thigh soothingly, moving her other hand out of Cheryl’s and lifting it to cup her face.

 

Cheryl swallows harshly, eyes flitting over her face, and Toni feels a smile tugging at her lips as she glances from Cheryl’s eyes to her lips.

 

“I’m… gonna kiss you now, okay?” she murmurs quietly, waiting for Cheryl’s consent which comes in the form of a tiny nod, before she surges forward slightly, capturing Cheryl’s lips with her own - just as she’s been wanting to do for… well, too fucking long.

 

She slides her hand into Cheryl’s hair, running her fingers through her red curls as their lips move languidly together. Cheryl’s a good kisser; inexperienced, a little reserved, but each passing second has the warmth and want in the pit of Toni’s stomach growing. She tugs lightly at Cheryl’s hair, and she gasps against her lips, soft pink lips moving against her own.

 

Toni doesn’t want to take things much further (well, she does, but she doesn’t think Cheryl’s ready for that) and then Cheryl pulls back for a breath of air before attaching their lips again, her hand finally moving up from her lap to rest against Toni’s waist, fingers curling into the fabric of her jeans. Her eagerness makes Toni smile, and after a few seconds longer, she regretfully pulls back, stroking Cheryl’s cheek carefully as the girl whines at the loss of contact, and she allows herself to smile properly. “Sure you’ve never done that before, Blossom? she asks, softly, chuckling at Cheryl’s bashful blush.

 

“N-no, I… That was wow,” she says, blinking as she leans into Toni’s hand, smiling in return. Her eyes are shining with excitement, and Toni can’t deny the pulsing adrenaline coursing through her own veins.

 

She nods in agreement, leaning forward and placing a final chaste kiss to Cheryl’s lip. “It really was,” she murmurs, brushing her cheek before chuckling and sitting back slightly. “Are you hungry? It’s kinda lunch time and we weren’t up for breakfast.”

 

Cheryl takes a few moments to regain her composure, before she smiles and nods slowly. “Yeah, kinda, I-”

 

She’s cut off by the sound of a phone ringing, and Toni knows that’s not her ringtone. She looks to Cheryl, who jumps up and moves over to the counter, picking up her phone. Toni watches as her face drains of colour, and she immediately feels a spark of worry.

 

“Cheryl?” she questions softly, watching as dark brown eyes flicker over to her, full of trepidation.

 

Lifting her phone up, Toni can tell her hand is trembling. “It’s my mother,” she says quietly, drawing in a sharp breath, before answering it and holding it to her ear.

 

Even from across the room, Toni can hear Penelope Blossom’s voice down the line, and she sounds angry. She can’t hear the woman’s words, but the tone alone makes Toni tense up, and she keeps her gaze on Cheryl, trying to gauge the emotion on her face, which currently seems to be emotionless.

 

“I… I’m a-at Veronica’s,” Cheryl speaks, her voice trembling more violently than Toni has ever heard it, and Toni’s heart clenches in empathy for her. “No, I-I… I took Jason’s car,” she says, and then seconds later winces and flinches away from the phone slightly. Toni can hear the ranting from the other end of the line getting louder.

 

“D-do I have to?” Cheryl asks quietly, after a few seconds of silence on her part. She’s met with an almost shriek on the other side of the line. “B-but, I…” she cuts herself off, and Toni can see her hand clutching her phone is beginning to shake slightly.

 

“Okay, mommy. I-I’ll be there.”

 

Then she’s hanging up, and Toni stands, making her way over with a concerned frown. “What did she say?” she asks, carefully, extending her hand to touch Cheryl’s arm as she approaches. She can’t help the worry she feels at the snippet of conversation she caught.

 

Cheryl swallows, ducking her head, sniffling softly. Toni can see the watery shimmer of her eyes, tears impending, and Toni rubs her arm in a motion that she hopes to be soothing. Sniffing a little harsher, Cheryl lifts her head, offering a weak smile. “I have to g-go back. Or she said, I… I won’t have a home to go to anymore.”

 

Toni stares at her in shock. “Oh, Cheryl,” she murmurs softly, heart swelling with empathy, and she moves to stand in front of her, pausing for a moment of thought before giving a firm nod. “Okay, I… I’m coming with you.”

 

She doesn’t allow herself to overthink it. She’d be nothing more than a monster if she let Cheryl go back to that abusive household all by herself.

 

Cheryl looks up, the surprise evident in her expression. She falters for a second, before swallowing and shaking her head. “Toni, no. She wouldn’t… I told her I’m at Veronica’s, and…” Cheryl shakes her head slightly, biting her lip. Her gaze flickers over to Toni’s serpent jacket, hung up by the door. Toni knows that Cheryl’s mother and (formerly) father are nothing if not heavily prejudiced against the Southside, and especially the Serpents. She would probably shoot Toni the moment she stepped foot on her property.

 

Toni sighs, running a hand through her hair, biting her lip. “I’m a Serpent,” she fills in for Cheryl, grimacing slightly. “Well then I’ll drive there with you, I’ll wait in the car. I’m not letting you go there alone, Cheryl, okay? I meant it when I told you I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure no one hurts you again.” She knows she sounds desperate, but truthfully, she kind of is. There’s no way she’ll stand by and send Cheryl back into the arms of an abusive parent without doing anything to help.

 

Cheryl looks conflicted. After a few seconds she wets her lips and nods, exhaling shakily. “Alright. But, Toni, what if she wants me to stay?” Cheryl asks, lip trembling slightly.

 

Toni can see the fear in her dark brown eyes, and she shifts forwards slightly, the hand still resting lightly on Cheryl’s arm sliding up to squeeze her shoulder and she pulls her into a careful hug.

 

Cheryl doesn’t resist, in fact, leans into it, her own arms wrapping around Toni’s waist and squeezing tightly. The slight height difference, means that Toni has to push herself up onto tiptoes to be able to wrap her arms around Cheryl’s neck, holding onto her just as tightly as Cheryl is clinging to her. She’s not the type of person who usually gives hugs, but she can tell that Cheryl’s the type of person who wants them. Toni rubs her back slightly, holding her a little tighter.

 

“I’ve got you. You’re safe, okay? I’m going to do everything I can to make sure it stays that way,” Toni murmurs, and it’s true. She will do anything to keep her safe. She’s not exactly sure what yet, but she’s going to come up with something to make sure Cheryl’s mother doesn’t have a hold over her anymore.

 

Cheryl sniffles lightly against her shoulder, and Toni’s heart aches slightly when the girl pulls back and reveals teary eyes. “Thank you, Toni,” she breathes softly, swallowing the lump in her throat and mustering up a small smile.

 

Toni simply leans in to place a soft kiss to her cheek, revelling in the way Cheryl’s face instantly turns a bright red. Drawing in a sharp breath, Toni brushes her thumb over Cheryl’s cheek and gives a small smile.

 

“This might sound crazy, but… I think I have a plan. But I’ll need you to trust me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because toni topaz actually HAS a backstory worth writing !!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys! sorry i missed last week’s update, i just have a lot going on at the moment! i did post a tweet about it, so if you wanna get updates on my fics and see other random choni related stuff my twitter is @chxrylblossomx 
> 
> okay, this chapter’s kinda vital i suppose. cheryl gets the closure she needs! small trigger warning for mentions of abuse.
> 
> without further ado... enjoy! :)

 

The burning flames cast a light onto Cheryl’s face, the colour akin to that of her copper red curls. Cheryl’s hand trembles ever so slightly at her tight grip on the candelabra, and despite her face being lit with an orangey hue from the candlelight, Toni can tell she’s utterly paled with nerves. 

 

She’s seen Cheryl anxious before; picked up on her stutter, the way she chews at her lip, clenches her fists, but… she doesn’t think she’s ever seen her quite this nervous. She understands though, because, three years ago Toni’s own mother was able to reduce her to a nervous wreck, and she sees that same fear on Cheryl’s face. A type of deep-seated fear that only a parent can instil within you. 

 

“Are you sure about this, Cher?” Toni breathes, voice barely above a whisper because they know that any  _ second  _ now Penelope will be back from the sheriff’s station, undoubtedly ready to rip Cheryl to shreds - whether metaphorically or literally, Toni doesn’t want them to have the chance to find out. 

 

For a few seconds, Cheryl’s eyes don’t shift from the candelabra, seemingly transfixed with the flame. But then she looks up, eyes meeting Toni’s for a split second, chin quivering slightly as she inhales a sharp breath of air. Her nose wrinkles as the smell of gasoline hits her full force, and Toni can’t help but find the action adorable.

 

“Not in the slightest, Toni.”

 

“You don’t have to do this, you know? It’s not too late to change your mind. We can come up with something else, something with less…” Toni hesitates, wetting her lips and resting a careful hand on Cheryl’s unsteady arm. “Less finality.”

 

It was her plan to begin with, of course it was, in the short time she’s known Cheryl it’s become apparent that she’s not one to break the rules. But by suggesting Cheryl scare her mother with the threat of burning down Thornhill, she hadn’t _really_ thought that Cheryl would propose that they go through with it. Hadn’t expected to stand in the doorway of the girl’s bedroom as she packed up two suitcases worth of her belongings, dumping them out front so they could grab them on their way out. 

 

Toni’s not about to stand in her way, though. She’s not about to try to persuade Cheryl out of it because she  _ understands _ . Every corner of this haunted manor holds a fragment of Jason, holds constant reminders of Cheryl’s unrelenting pain. 

 

This could be the best thing for her.

 

Or maybe the craziest, Toni’s not sure, but she’s not going to attempt to change Cheryl’s mind. Nor is she going to leave her side.

 

“No, I-I’m sure Toni. I… I have to end this. Once and f-for all. For Jason, and for myself,” Cheryl murmurs, accompanying her words with a nod of certainty that Toni doesn’t dare to question. 

 

“Okay.” Toni nods, firmly, hand sliding down Cheryl’s arm to steady her trembling hand, fingers carefully gripping her wrist. “You’ll be careful though, won’t you? No accidentally setting yourself on fire or anything.”

 

Cheryl’s lips twitch into a small smile, eyes flickering to Toni’s as she nods her head. “I’ll be careful, Toni. I promise.”

 

Drawing in a sharp breath, Toni slowly nods once more, eyes scouring over Cheryl’s face. “Okay… okay, and although I’m not opposed to teaching your ghastly mother a lesson, try not to let her get burnt to a husk either. I need you  _ not  _ dead nor in jail, okay?”

 

Smile widening slightly, Cheryl nods again, eyes shining slightly in light of the flame. There’s a short silence between them, and then Cheryl swallows harshly, smile slipping as her eyes dart to the doorway. “Toni…” she begins, and the girl in question tips her head slightly, giving Cheryl the go ahead to continue, hand squeezing her forearm carefully and comfortingly. “I-I’m not  _ crazy _ , right? This isn’t… this isn’t crazy?” 

 

“Of course it’s crazy,” Toni says, without missing a beat, and she rushes to continue at the further fall of Cheryl’s smile. “Burning down your house down  _ is _ fucking crazy, Cher. But after everything you’ve been through, the last few months, even the last few  _ days _ … after all the shit you’ve survived, conquered, and come out the other side of - you’ve earned the right to a little crazy.” Toni smiles softly, brushing Cheryl’s arm lightly and then dropping her own to her side. “There’s nothing wrong with crazy.”

 

Cheryl laughs softly, and Toni feels her heart  _ expand _ , and is just about to join her in the sentiment when the sound of a car pulling up in the drive cuts them both short. 

 

Cheryl  _ freezes _ . 

 

“Cher? Hey, you’re gonna do fine, okay? I’m gonna go out the back like we talked about, and I’ll be waiting, alright? You’ve got this.” Toni grips her shoulders firmly, able to feel the trembles of the girl’s body as she does so. 

 

Toni hesitates for only a second, before placing a careful kiss on Cheryl’s cheek, squeezing her shoulders once more and slipping out of the living room. The front door clicks open just as she does, and as she finds her way into the kitchen and out the back of the house, all Toni can think is,

 

_ Please don’t let her get hurt again. _

 

*

 

“Cheryl?” 

 

Penelope’s voice slices through the silence, being the only sound aside from the almost silent flickering of the flames of the candlebra. 

 

“Cheryl, dear  _ god _ , what is that smell?” Penelope shouts again, and Cheryl hears the sound of her handbag hitting the floor, then her heels against the wooden floorboards. It’s shortly after followed by, “I know you’re  _ here _ , child, the Impala is parked out front-”

 

Penelope Blossom stops short in the doorway of the living room, dark brown - almost  _ black  _ \- eyes flying wide in surprise at the sight of her daughter in the middle of the room, in clothes she’d never allow her to wear and holding high a candlestick. It only takes her a second to regain her composure, though, as she’s shaking her head, an infuriated huff leaving her lips as she does so. 

 

“Stop these childish antics now. Put down the candelabra, Cheryl, and get  _ out  _ of those clothes. I always knew the Lodge girl was a bad influence on you,” she begins to ramble, taking a few more steps towards Cheryl - who still feels  _ frozen _ , glued to the spot in fear - until she stops, falters. 

 

“What… what is the smell, Cheryl?” she asks, once more, and Cheryl finally thinks that maybe she sees a crack in the previously stainless steel facade. 

 

She tightens her grip on the candelabra, straightening her posture and clearing her throat. “Gasoline,” she croaks out, voice a little shaky, but clear nonetheless. 

 

Penelope stares at her for a second, before she swallows audibly, reaching a hand out. “Dear god, Cheryl… hand me that, hand me that  _ now _ , do you hear me?” she speaks firmly, waving her hand a little as a small reminder of authority, eyes darting nervously down to the carpet. She can see now that it’s soaked through. 

 

“I’m afraid I c-can’t do that, Mommy,” Cheryl responds, and tries to ignore the tremble in her tone, “So please take a step back.”

 

Penelope’s eyes widen slightly. She hesitates, clearly conflicted, before she complies. She looks angry, though, and Cheryl can imagine just how demeaning it is to take orders from the daughter you view to be such  _ scum.  _ She enjoys it immensely. 

 

“This isn’t a game, Cheryl. I have no clue in damnation what it is that you’re playing at, but this is  _ dangerous _ . You’re going to face the consequences for this, do you understand?” Penelope rambles, and Cheryl wonders how she’s still trying to pretend as though she’s in control here, in  _ charge _ . One slip of the hand, and Cheryl could set them both ablaze. 

 

Of course she wouldn’t. Because  _ Toni _ . But Penelope doesn’t know that.

 

“I’m not playing a game, Mumsie. I’m here for one reason, and one reason  _ only _ ,” she lowers the candlestick a little, internally rejoicing at the flash of fear on Penelope’s face. 

 

“And what is that?”

 

Cheryl smiles, an actual smile that feels weird and out of place, but… definitely as though she’s earned it. “To burn this house down.”

 

Penelope looks scared once again, and Cheryl almost feels remorse, she  _ almost does _ . Almost thinks she could place down the candles, and walk out the house. Satisfied by shaking up her mother alone, hoping - vanely, perhaps - that Penelope wouldn’t pursue her. But then she remembers all the times that she’s no doubt looked at her mother with that same fear on her face. All the times she’s been  _ terrified _ , been absolutely frozen in fear because of  _ her _ , and Clifford, and everything they’ve done to her… all those times, and not once did Penelope take pity on her, show her some mercy. Not once did the onslaught of abuse lessen, not once did she receive a kind word or a loving glance. 

 

No. Not once. And she intends to show the exact same amount of mercy. 

 

Swallowing all her doubts and fears for the moment, Cheryl allows herself a sharp inhale, forcing her hands to stop trembling. Her mother is  _ listening.  _ Well and truly listening to her, and maybe for the first time in seventeen years. She isn’t going to waste this opportunity. 

 

“This is the house where Jason and I were born. The house where you raised us both. The house where you and Daddy decided to  _ groom  _ him for the stupid g-goddamn drug business. The house where we played together, where we ran around, and grew up… and it is the same place that Daddy sat upstairs in his study and planned Jason’s… m-murder. The same place that you and Daddy both subjected me to  _ years  _ of abuse, a-and… never  _ once  _ gave me a shred of love or the affection that I-I… I  _ deserve _ . This house is the embodiment of our family’s depraved, twisted ways. Every inch of this godforsaken hellhole holds another memory, another abhorrent truth that I- I can't  _ stand  _ to be around any longer.”

 

Cheryl watches Penelope swallow once more, arms tightening across her chest, a bead of sweat on her forehead, lips pursed in a tight line. She isn’t sure whether her mother is scared, but as horrible as it is, she hopes so. 

 

Then Penelope laughs. A short humourless chuckle, but it sends shivers down Cheryl’s spine all the same. “You’ve lost your mind, that’s all there is to it. You’ve gone  _ crazy _ , Cheryl. Just like I always knew you would.”

 

Inhaling sharply, Cheryl nods her head. She wets her lips, subconsciously glancing towards the window despite the drawn curtains. She finds comfort with the fact that Toni’s right out there; waiting for  _ her _ . In fact, her heart warms a little. “Maybe I have. So what?” she asks, but continues quickly. “What you and Daddy did to me, was abuse, plain and simple. But it ends now, Mommy. With this house, goes… everything. Every bad memory, every night of bruises, e-every beating… All of it goes away.”

 

Cheryl’s hands are beginning to shake, and perhaps it’s the adrenaline of the situation, she isn’t sure but she can’t maintain this for much longer. Not to mention Toni will be growing worried. Toni gave her a fifteen minute limit, just in case things went bad. She draws in a sharp breath. 

 

“Anything else to add?” she asks, tipping her head slightly as she looks at her mother. 

 

Penelope has never looked at her for quite this long, with quite so much depth of emotion in her eyes, and if Cheryl wasn’t vibrating with the situation at hand she may stop to think about it. “Dear god, child… you’re well and truly mad.”

 

Without a second thought, Cheryl allows her hand to slip. Her grip slackens on the candelabra and it falls to the ground, almost in slow motion, colliding with the gasoline soaked carpet as Cheryl takes a step backwards. An orange flame explodes from the carpet, neon and bright, like no fire she’s ever seen before. She rushes to the outskirts of the room, because it’s spreading fast, and she can already feel the heat against her legs. 

 

Penelope’s at the wall, desperately tugging at the family portrait of the four of them which hangs above the fireplace and for a second - just a single second - Cheryl’s heart aches for the semblance of a family that she lost. But then it’s gone, replaced by the hatred towards her parents, the aching grief she feels for Jason… 

 

She grabs Penelope’s arm, squeezing tightly and tugging her towards the exit that’s slowly closing up, engulfed by bright angry flames. Taken by surprise at the action, Penelope is pulled in her direction, and although the woman stumbles, Cheryl powers forward, ignoring Penelope’s muffled hisses, drowned by the roar of the flames. 

 

“The  _ portrait _ , Cheryl!” Penelope cries loudly, and Cheryl feels her mother scratching at her arm. 

 

She ignores it, biting back a wince at familiar pain, pulling further towards the exit. She hates her mother, she  _ does _ , but by no means will she allow this woman the satisfaction of dying at her hands. She may now be an arsonist but she won’t add a murderer to the growing list of her criminalities. 

 

Cheryl reaches the front door, using her free hand to tug at the handle which is already hot to the touch. She manages to wrench it open, though a yelp of pain escapes her at the burn she feels at her palm, and in that moment her grip falters and Penelope is ripping away from her, before Cheryl can stop her. 

 

“Mother!” she screeches, a cough escaping her lips, despite the now fresh air leaking in from the open door. Her heart hammers a little faster in her chest as Penelope vanishes behind a wall of flames that seem to encompass the living room.

 

_ No, don’t let her do this to me… don’t let her make me a murderer… no, no, no- _

 

“Cheryl! Hey, hey, come on!” 

 

It’s Toni. It’s  _ Toni,  _ and as much as Cheryl’s heart leaps at the realisation, her mother’s inside, she’s in there,  _ goddamn it Penelope…  _

 

“My mother, Toni, she’s- I tried to pull her out, she ran back in f-for the portrait, I…  _ stupid  _ p-portrait, I c-can’t-” Cheryl’s breathing is suddenly shaky, her voice trembling, eyes blurred with tears as the situation begins to catch up to her. 

 

She hears Toni’s footsteps rushing towards the house, and her voice again, Cheryl’s fucking anchor amidst the panic. “Hey, you cant go back in there, Cheryl, okay? I know… but the firemen are on their way, yeah? Come on out,  _ please _ , the smoke isn’t good for you, Cher,” Toni’s voice sounds a little frantic too, and a few seconds later the sound of sirens register in her brain as well. 

 

_ Already? How did they get alerted so fast? _

 

Cheryl feels a whine escaping her lips, panic building up more because Penelope still hasn’t emerged from the flames, what if she’s dead, oh god, oh  _ fuck _ -

 

That’s when she sees her, emerging from the circle of flames like goddamn Daenerys Targaryen, except Cheryl wants to scream and smash that stupid portrait she’s clinging to. Penelope barges past her without a thought, and Cheryl takes note of her loud coughing, ash-blackened hair, the redness of her face… 

 

She bursts out of the building shortly behind her mother, subconsciously taking a deep breath in and coughing harshly as soon as the fresh air hits her lungs. She stumbles straight into Toni’s arms, a gasping sob escaping her lips before she can stop it. Her lungs ache ever so slightly, but she’s  _ fine _ , really, she’s fine, right, she’s okay… except… no, she’s really not. 

 

Another sob leaves her and then she’s gripping onto Toni, holding her close, focusing on the feel of her warm body against her own and blanking out of everything else. 

 

“I’ve got you, shh… okay, Cher, I’ve got you babe,” Toni’s voice is soft in her ear, the arms that are now around Cheryl are strong and safe, but also warm and gentle. Her hand rubs a careful circle against Cheryl’s back, all but keeping her up with her arms hooked beneath the sobbing girl’s own. “Let it out, it’s alright, you’re safe with me…” 

 

In the background, it’s a blur of chaos; fire trucks and an ambulance haphazardly parked in the drive, Penelope Blossom clinging to her portrait and crying, deaf to the attempts of an EMT to comfort her, firemen already starting towards the house to begin the vane task of salvaging the rapidly crumbling building… 

 

But Cheryl’s blind to it all, for now, focusing simply on Toni. On the girl who’s become her anchor in such a short time, the girl who’s providing her with more safety than she’s known in her entire  _ life _ . The girl who holds her so tightly that she feels truly protected… Cheryl focuses on her, on her words, on her hold, taking as many deep breaths as she can despite the dull ache of her chest. 

 

“I’m right here, Cher. I’m not going anywhere, okay? Not now, not tomorrow, not the day after that… you’ve got me, okay?” Toni’s murmuring, lips pressed to the shell of her ear as she does so.

 

Cheryl draws in a trembling breath, clinging to Toni tighter as her legs weaken beneath her. “Don’t l-let me go, Toni,  _ p-please _ ,” she whines out, fingers curling into the fabric of Toni’s leather jacket, nose burying further into Toni’s neck. 

 

She feels the arms around her tighten, the lips at her ear press a feather light kiss, the hand on her back rub a little harder. Toni hushes her softly.

 

“Never, Cheryl. Never, I promise.”

 

*

 

“Okay… okay, here, sit down, yeah? Do you want a drink or anything?” Toni’s hands are gentle on Cheryl’s shoulders, carefully easing her down onto the couch. 

 

Cheryl allows Toni to guide her, collapsing back against the cushions with an exhausted sigh as soon as she’s done so. Taking another shaky breath that still makes her lungs ache slightly, Cheryl shakes her head and gives Toni a soft smile. “I’m okay, I promise, Toni.”

 

Watching her dubiously for a second, Toni sighs and nods, running a hand through her hair. “Will you let me know if you need anything, though?” she asks, to which Cheryl smiles and nods. 

 

“I will,” Cheryl can’t help but chuckle quietly because Toni’s such a worrier. “Actually, will you… sit here? Like, close to me?” she asks, cheeks flushing slightly as the words leave her lips, because being able to ask such a thing makes her stomach feel warm and fuzzy.

 

“You want me to cuddle you?” Toni asks, lips lifting into a teasing smile that makes Cheryl groan and shake her head, dropping her gaze.

 

“No, never mind, I-”

 

She’s cut off by Toni flopping onto the couch beside her and lifting up her arm. She grins softly at Cheryl, shaking her head. “I’m just teasing you, Cher, I’m sorry. Of course I’ll cuddle you, c’mere.”

 

Cheryl’s cheeks burn slightly, and she nods, shifting closer to Toni with a slightly shy smile. She leans into the other girl’s embrace happily, a sense of safety encompassing her just as soon as Toni’s arms do. It’s a growingly familiar feeling that she can’t envision herself getting sick of anytime soon.

 

It falls silent for a little while, but it’s a kind of comfortable silence that allows Cheryl to settle into Toni’s arms and relax, focusing on Toni’s hand tracing gentle patterns on her shoulder. 

 

The quiet is eventually broken by Toni, who dips her head slightly to place a light kiss to Cheryl’s temple, tugging her the slightest bit closer. “Has Veronica messaged you, or anything?” she asks, and when Cheryl shakes her head, she hears Toni let out a quiet sigh of frustration. “Seriously?”

 

“I- uh, no, I don’t think she has.” Cheryl frowns, dropping her head slightly, a little confusion swimming in her gut.  _ Should  _ Veronica have messaged her? Sure, the news of Thornhill burning is probably spreading around town like a wildfire by now… the gossip surrounding Penelope Blossom’s admittance to hospital for minor first degree burns and minimal smoke inhalation has likely reached the Lodge’s household but… 

 

Oh.

 

Cheryl hears Toni sigh, and then feels two gentle fingers beneath her chin, lifting her head slightly. “Hey, I didn’t mean to make you worry. She could be giving you space, or even looking for you, or maybe she hasn’t even heard yet…” Toni trails off, shaking her head a little and giving Cheryl a smile. “Don’t stress, okay?”

 

Cheryl nods, still uncertain, and Toni leans in slowly and plants a light kiss to her lips. It only lasts a second or so, maybe not even that, but Cheryl’s entire body lights up with enough excitement to push any negative thoughts out of her mind, and her lips curl up into a shy smile.

 

Toni laughs. “Better?” She asks, thumb brushing Cheryl’s jaw carefully, smiling in return when she receives a nod. 

 

“Much better,” Cheryl responds, lifting her hand to twirl the ends of Toni’s hair around her fingers as she tips her head a little. Swallowing, she gives a small nod to herself and meets Toni’s eye. “I do have a question, though.”

 

“Go ahead.”

 

Cheryl sighs softly, capturing her bottom lip between her teeth to try and control her nerves. She reminds herself that it’s only Toni, no need to be nervous. “What will it be like at school?” she asks, continuing to play with the ends of Toni’s soft pink hair. 

 

Toni falls silent for a little while. In fact, it’s long enough that Cheryl begins to worry a little, but when she shifts a little uncomfortably, Toni meets her eye once more and flashes a small reassuring smile. “Honestly? I’m not too sure, Cher,” she sighs quietly, eyes scanning over the redhead’s face for a few moments. “I know that… it’s going to be hard for you to face everyone, after everything, and if you’re not ready just yet that’s completely understandable. But as for what it will be like for  _ us _ ? I don’t really know.”

 

Cheryl isn’t used to seeing Toni so unsure, and it’s a little unsettling. She nods slowly, cuddling further into her and resting her head back on Toni’s chest. She takes a deep breath in, tracing the dip of Toni’s shirt lightly and pursing her lips. “Okay, I just- your friends. I-I don’t want them to… to be mean to you if they find out. So if this has to stop, then I-I understand.”

 

She’s surprised when Toni sits up abruptly, displacing her from her comfortable position on the girl’s chest, and even more surprised when she feels two hands against her face and finds herself staring Toni straight in the eye. “ _ No _ . Cheryl, don’t think like that, okay? I’m not leading you on, I’m not going to ditch you, I… fuck, I care about you a lot!” Toni says, swallowing harshly, eyes flickering over Cheryl’s face. “I’m not sure how public the knowledge of  _ this  _ can be, just yet, because… well, people, you know? They talk and judge and stare and, I’m not sure how ready either of us are for that- but, I’m not going anywhere alright? I’m not going to leave you.”

 

Cheryl stares at Toni for a second, before pursing her lips once more and nodding quickly. She has to do her best to hold back her tears because, god, she’s so  _ sick  _ of crying in front of Toni. 

 

She must seem so  _ weak _ .

 

But Toni’s words stir up emotions within her, all the ness of emotions that she’s been struggling through the last few days, and it’s so  _ hard  _ to keep it together when Toni makes her feel safe enough to want to let go. 

 

“Hey… hey, look at me,” Toni coos softly, and Cheryl obliges, a single tear slipping down her cheek as she does so. “It’s okay, you can cry if you want to. It’s alright.”

 

Cheryl sniffles slightly, shaking her head and bringing her hand up to rub at her eyes harshly. “No, I’m f-fine, it’s just-”

 

“It’s a lot,” Toni finishes for her, smiling understandingly at the nod she receives. “I know, Cher. So why don’t we just take a couple of days, okay? We don’t have to go tomorrow, not if you’re not ready.”

 

Cheryl stares at her for a moment, dabbing at here eyes still. “Both of us?” she asks. 

 

Chuckling quietly, Toni raises her eyebrows. “You think I’m gonna leave you? Not a chance,” she mutters, threading her fingers carefully through Cheryl’s hair for comfort, “Does that sound like a plan?”

 

“Yeah,” Cheryl nods, smiling a little shyly, the weight on her chest suddenly feeling a lot lighter. “Yeah, that… that sounds good, TT.” The nickname slips out without a second thought, and only when Cheryl catches Toni’s slightly arched eyebrow does she register what she said. 

 

“TT?” Toni questions, smirking, stroking Cheryl’s hair lightly. 

 

Shrugging, Cheryl simply burrows closer to Toni with a sheepish grin, revelling in the feeling of Toni’s fingers tangled in her curls. “Toni Topaz… TT. I won’t use it again if you don’t like it, I just-”

 

“Shh,” Toni chuckles softly, shaking her head and planting a kiss to Cheryl’s forehead. “I like it. It’s cute. Just like you.”

 

Feeling the all too familiar itch of a blush at her cheeks, Cheryl allows Toni to embrace her even closer, relaxing into the serpent’s arms with a contented sigh and a small smile on her lips. Yes, this weekend’s been hell - one thing after another - and nothing could make her want to relive it, but… 

 

She’s  _ so  _ fucking thankful that she has Toni at her side to make it all that little bit easier.

 

So she wouldn’t trade her position right now for _anything_.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know your thoughts!! i mean it when i say that hearing from you guys literally makes my day <3


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